Cruel Fortune (Cruel #2)(40)

“What do you hope to accomplish by ambushing me? Whatever this act is, it isn’t going to work.”

“Who said it was an act?”

I narrowed my eyes at him. “You’ve done this in the past. I’m not going to fall all over myself just because you look good in a suit.”

“Oh, do you think so?”

I silently reprimanded myself for saying that out loud. Yes, of course, he looked sexy in a suit, but that wasn’t the point.

“Not the point,” I grumbled.

“Fine. You want to know why I’m here?”

He straightened and seemed to let whatever mask he’d been wearing slide off. In that instant, I saw my Penn. The one who’d ordered my favorite pizza and gone stargazing with me. Who’d laughed at stupid jokes and written seriously, avidly about his passion. Who hadn’t had to pretend with me…even when it was all a lie.

“Yes,” I whispered, taken aback by the sudden change, “I do.”

“Maybe I wanted to see you.”

“And you thought using your old charms would change things?”

“Flying a thousand miles and begging you to come back didn’t,” he said bitterly. “Why not try what actually worked?”

“Nothing is going to work. Not after what you did to me. So, let me leave.”

He stepped easily in front of me before I could bypass him and snagged my elbow. “Stay.”

“I’m not going to play mind games with you.”

“No mind games,” he said, stepping closer into me. “Just me.”

My heart lurched at the way he’d said that. At that look in his eyes that said, in a sea of people, he only had eyes for me. I wanted to revel in that. Wanted to trust that so much. But I didn’t. And I couldn’t.

“I haven’t seen you in a year, and now, you want this?” I whispered hoarsely.

“I’ve always wanted this,” he said sincerely.

I shook off that pain and shoved it back down where it belonged. I tugged my arm out of his grasp. “You put a bet on me, Penn. That you could get me to fall for you, and I did. How could I ever trust you again?”

“You seem to be trusting Lewis just fine.”

“Don’t bring him into this.”

“Don’t bring him into this?” he asked, fire burning in his eyes. “Are you fucking kidding me? You show up with my best friend, who I’ll remind you was there for that fucking bet and didn’t tell you about it either. Then you expect me to not talk about that?”

I glared at him. “I know he was involved. I’m aware.”

“Good. Then you’ll have to excuse me when I say that you must be out of your goddamn mind to be here with him right now.”

“Him instead of you?” I quipped. “Because you two are the exact same person, and there’s no difference whatsoever between the man who used and manipulated and bet on me and the man who didn’t?”

Penn laughed sardonically. “You don’t see through him? We’re friends for a reason. Lewis is not some innocent. You’re just another one of his many obsessions. And when he gets tired of them, what do you think happens?”

“Stop. You know what? If you want to discuss Lewis, then I’m out of here.” I shouldered past him and reached for the door. The knob twisted in my hand.

“Sure, just run away,” he snapped, his hand coming down on the door, so I couldn’t open it. “Don’t address the real issue here. Let’s not talk about the fact that you moved to my city after saying that you didn’t want this life. Yet here you are, Natalie.”

I whirled on him. “I am not in this city for you or Lewis or this life.”

“Doesn’t really look like that from the outside. Were you lying to me in Charleston when you said you didn’t want to be a part of this world? Were you lying when you said it could have worked out between us? I let you go because I understood where you were coming from. I hate my life. I can’t really escape. There’s no hope for me, and I refuse to put that burden on someone else. But now, you’re back, and you’re living this life of your own free will.”

My hands were trembling. I was so pissed off at what he was saying. The truth in his words and the lies in his words. The way he twisted what I’d said when he hurt me to fit the world I was living in now.

“I don’t have to justify myself to you.”

“No, of course not. You can walk all over my heart, but a justification is too much to ask for.”

“Walk all over your heart?” I gasped. “After what you did, you want me to believe that this is hurting you?”

“Isn’t that why you’re doing it?”

I shook my head in frustration. “God, you are so narcissistic. You’re just mad that you’re not getting your way.”

“Yes, I’m mad. I’m fucking mad that I let you go because you didn’t want this life. But now, you’re willing to have that life with someone else.”

The words were a slap in the face. They weren’t a lie either. This life didn’t feel the same with Lewis as it had with Penn. There wasn’t Katherine. I didn’t have ex-girlfriends trying to jump in and take what belonged to me. Or his mother firing me and calling me trash. Or a fucking bet. And I didn’t have to deal with this bullshit.