Conviction (Consolation Duet #2)(52)

“No, I’m not going anywhere again. I have my daughter, and I wouldn’t ever put you through something like this again,” he says and looks away. The tone in his voice makes the underlying message clear.

“What does that mean?” I can’t help but ask anyway.

“It means that I wouldn’t choose deploying over you. I’m here, Lee. I’m not going to leave, or get injured, or die. I’m here.” Aaron’s voice is low and pleading.

“You did leave, get injured, and hell, you died too. You weren’t active then. Don’t use this against me,” I warn.

He stands and looks at the ceiling. “This is our house, Natalie. It’s where we made a home. We conceived a child here, had fights here, made love here, and I thought we’d grow old here.”

I don’t know where all of this is coming from. He hasn’t tried to make a move in months. We’ve been friendly and I’ve never lead him to believe there was a chance at more.

“I did too. I didn’t choose for our life to fall apart. I know you made mistakes. I’ve forgiven you for them, but it doesn’t change how I feel. I don’t want to fight with you about this,” I plead for him to stop.

“I don’t want you to have a baby with him,” Aaron’s voice cracks at the end. He stares at my stomach and tears fall from his eyes. I follow his gaze and realize I’m in my shorts and a tank top with a very clear baby bump. “I thought maybe you were, but I didn’t want it. I’ve really lost you. Haven’t I?”

“Have I led you on?” I ask with hesitation. I tried hard not to ever let him think we were going to get back together.

He looks at Aara and back at me. “I hoped, Lee. I’m getting help. I know I f*cked up . . . God, I know it . . . but I’ve always loved you. I would do anything to prove to you how good we could be. I’m doing everything the doctors want. I’m not seeing anyone because they’re not you. We can get back and we can be better.”

“Aaron, please don’t do this now. First, Liam is deployed. His mother is on life support and I’m pregnant. I love you, I always have, but our love changed. It became friendship and comfort. We let it slip through our fingers and then the choices each of us made defined our future. You will always have my past, but Liam holds my future.”

“We define our futures.”

“So do our pasts,” I say hushed.

Once again, he glances at my stomach and rests his head in his hands. I give him a minute because I can’t imagine this is easy for him. The pain of finding out about Brittany was horrible for me, and I certainly didn’t want him to find out this way.

“Were you trying? Were you going to tell me?” he asks gruffly.

“Not before I told him, and no, we weren’t trying,” I reply honestly.

“Un-f*cking real. I couldn’t get you pregnant after years of trying and . . .” he trails off.

Aaron stands and walks over to Aarabelle. He places a kiss on the top of her head before turning back to me. “I’ll never stop loving you, but right now I can’t look at you. I’ll be back later, but I need some time.”

I don’t want to hurt him. It was never my intention. “I’m sorry you found out like this. I’m sorry you’re hurting.”

“I guess we’re even now,” he sneers.

I know he’s angry and upset, but it stings. Instead of going back at him, I stay silent. This won’t end well for either of us, and I won’t break him further.

He looks at me once more and the pain rolls across his face. Aaron cups my face with his hand and then drops it.

Without a word, he walks out the door and the loud sound of it closing slams the door in my heart.



It’s been three whole days. Seventy-two hours that I’ve yet to hear from Liam. I’m growing anxious and frustrated. I called the Red Cross again, ensuring the message was delivered to his command, which it was. His father called me this morning asking if he was going to make it home, and I couldn’t answer him.

I don’t know what to do, but I need to do something. Paige arrives to watch Aarabelle so I can go get some answers. I grab my purse and rush out the door. It makes me sick that I’m going to go this route, but I have no choice.

Aaron called this morning to find out what was going on. Even he seemed concerned that Liam hadn’t gotten in touch. He apologized again, but said he needed some time away to get his mind straight. Then he offered to still keep Aarabelle if I needed. If anyone’s lost the most, it’s him. He lost his wife and his best friend and the life he thought he was coming home to.

My phone rings and my pulse spikes. “Hello?” I answer immediately not even looking at the caller I.D.

“Lee, it’s Jackson.”

“Hi,” I say depressed.

“I’m guessing you still haven’t heard from him?”

“No, nothing, and I’m getting worried.”

“I’m sorry, I just wanted to see if there was anything you needed. I can call a few people and try to get some damn answers.”

I know he’ll do whatever he can, but there’s really no way he can get answers. He’s not active anymore. He’s a contractor. Sure, he has connections but they’re not going to hand over information on an active mission.