Coming Home(89)

Her expression was smooth as she looked at him.

Guarded.

“What are you doing here?” she asked softly.

Danny wet his lips before he held up her jacket, and she glanced down at it before bringing her eyes back to him.

“Thanks,” she said, reaching to take it from him, and he handed it over before shoving both hands in his pockets.

“I’m ready to tell you everything, Leah.”

The tiniest flicker of surprise flashed across her face before she composed her expression again, folding her jacket over her arm.

“I know I don’t deserve it,” he said, “but just hear me out. After that, if you want nothing to do with me, I promise I won’t ever bother you again.”

She stood there in silence, her eyes searching his face, and then she bit her lip before she stepped to the side, granting him access to her apartment.

He walked past her and into her living room, the nerves temporarily winning out over his resolve, and he reached up and rubbed the back of his neck as he heard her close the door behind him.

“How did you know where I lived?”

Danny jammed his hands in his pockets again. “I looked you up,” he said as he turned to face her. “I’m sorry. You weren’t answering my texts, and to be honest, I thought if I asked, you would’ve told me not to come, and I had to come. I can’t do this anymore. The partial truths and the bullshit and the secrets.”

She sighed softly, laying her coat over a nearby chair before she motioned for him to sit down. Danny lowered himself onto the edge of her couch, leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees as he dropped his head.

A few seconds later, he heard her come into the room, and he looked up as she curled into the chaise lounger next to him, her eyes on the hem of her sweatshirt as she twisted it between her fingers.

He took a deep breath before he shifted to face her, and her fingers stilled as she glanced up at him.

“Last night,” Danny started, and her eyes instantly dropped. “I’m really sorry about the way I handled that.”

Her eyes were still pinned on her sweatshirt, but Danny could see her cheeks flooding with color.

“It wasn’t that I didn’t want you. I did. I wanted you so f*cking bad. I still do.”

Leah’s eyes flashed up, her expression taken aback, and he felt his shoulders soften.

“Did you really think it was because I didn’t want you?”

She shrugged. “What else was I supposed to think?”

He exhaled heavily before dragging both hands down his face. “God, I’m an *,” he mumbled. “You have to understand something, Leah. You had just told me you hadn’t dated anyone, hadn’t been with anyone in two years, and then you wanted me. It didn’t matter how bad I wanted you. I couldn’t do it. Not before you knew the truth. You were making a decision without having all the information. I didn’t want you to regret being with me, and there’s a good chance that after you hear what I’m about to tell you, you would have. And I refuse to be another reason for you to doubt yourself.”

Danny leaned back against the couch, running both hands up through his hair as he said, “I’m sorry I asked you to leave the way I did, but Jesus Christ, Leah, I only have so much self-control. I was trying so hard to do the right thing, but the way you were looking at me…and the way you were kissing me…and then hearing you say please.” He closed his eyes and exhaled, the memory causing his stomach to flip in a way that had nothing to do with nerves. “I didn’t know how much longer I could hold out with you right in front of me. I was hanging on by a f*cking thread as it was,” he said, rubbing his hand over his eyes.