Collide (Collide #1)(160)

Trapped.

She felt trapped under the glare of those beautiful blue eyes, and she wasn't about to let him suck her back under their spell. "You're out of your mind if you think I'm falling for that one! You can't lie your way back into my heart, Gavin. I hate what you did to me, what you did to us, and most of all, I hate you!" Part of her froze when those words tumbled from her mouth because she didn't hate him. She couldn't. She loved him - loved him clear to the bottom of her soul. However, everything she knew he'd stood for from the second she'd met him was everything he'd proven himself to be.

Gavin recoiled as though she hit him again. His heart sank as shock shifted to realization that he may have lost her - and losing her meant he would lose himself. "You don't hate me. You love me," he choked out, not trying to hide the pain that was ready to crush him. Lifting his arms, he held her face between his hands, stroking the pads of his thumbs over her lips. "And, Jesus Christ, Emily, I love you with everything inside of me, with everything I am, with everything I'll ever be. Please. Don't leave me like this, knowing if I just hadn't let her in, this wouldn't be happening right now. She came to my house, and I shouldn't have let her in. I know I shouldn't have, but she was drunk, and her - "

"Stop!" she blurted out, shoving her hand viciously against his chest. It worked because she finally released herself from his hold. Stepping onto the curb, hot angry tears rolled down her cheeks as she flared her arms in the air in an attempt to hail over a taxi. With curtains of rain falling from the sky, her efforts went unnoticed as drivers sped past, drenching her body further.

Approaching her, Gavin felt lightheaded, hollow, and empty. He took her firmly by the elbow and spun her around. Their eyes, both equally dripping with hurt, bore into one another's. Bringing his arms up again, he cupped her cheeks and lowered his forehead against hers.

"You have to believe me," he whispered harshly, his voice laden with pain. "She passed out on my couch. I slept in my f*cking room, and nothing - nothing at all - happened." Now sobbing uncontrollably, Emily tried to back away, but Gavin moved his hands to the back of her neck and held her in place, his forehead still pressing against hers. "I told you that I'd never hurt you, and I meant it. I meant every f*cking word. Please don't do this to us...please. I'm not lying to you. I'm not him. I'm not Dillon."

Feeling trapped in the darkness of his gaze, Emily's heart paused as she watched tiny droplets of water trickle down his face - down to those perfect lips that had worshipped every inch of her body. Those perfect lips that had also worshipped another woman's body after she'd left. Now her tears came in a torrent as the thought of what he had done hit her with brutal force.

Shaking her head, she took several steps back, her eyes glacial. Turning around, she raised her hand to hail a taxi again, and to her surprise, one pulled right over. She reached for the handle and swung the door open. Gavin's hand quickly slammed against it, effectively keeping it shut.

"Let me get in, Gavin!"

"No. I'm not letting you go," he said, his voice booming. "You don't believe me?"

"I'm not kidding! Let me in!" she commanded again, the viciousness of her tone startling them both.

Running his free hand through his soaked hair, Gavin gritted his teeth. "You'll believe the f*cking lies he tells you on a daily basis, but you can't believe me?"

"Oh, now you're really reaching," she scoffed, trying to remove his hand from the door. "He's not the one who's lied to me!"