Calmly, Carefully, Completely(37)

He freezes, and his hand tightens on my hip. “Nope.” He shakes his head.

I pull my head back and look into his eyes. “It’s all right,” I say. “I want to try it.”

He sets me back from him. “Nope,” he says again. He shakes his head even more vehemently.

“Why not?” I can’t believe I’m begging this man to kiss me. Is this what I’ve been reduced to?

He heaves a sigh. “I’m not going to kiss you because I can’t tell if you want to kiss me or if you want to kiss someone you don’t think is a threat for practice.”

“What if it’s a little bit of both?” I ask.

He shakes his head, and I think he might be a little bit pissed. “When you feel an overwhelming desire to kiss me—” He stops and pats his chest. “—When you want to kiss Pete,” he says. “I’ll kiss you. If you want to practice, you can find someone else to help you out.”

I don’t understand. “It’s just a kiss.”

He takes my chin in a gentle grip and forces me to look into his eyes. “When I finally kiss you, it’s going to be because you want to kiss me, Pete, the man, the one who looks at you with wonder in his eyes, the one who is so f*cking scared of these brand-new feelings for you that he sometimes can’t breathe, the one who is dying to taste you. I have thought about you almost every day since I met you, princess, and I don’t want to get you off my mind.” He kisses the tip of my nose quickly and pulls back. “But when I kiss you, it’s going to be because you have a thing for me that’s as big as the thing I have for you.”

I can’t help it. I look toward his lap. He chuckles.

“Yeah, that too,” he says with a laugh.

“So what do we do now?” I ask. I can’t believe it. The first time I have wanted to kiss someone since the assault and he’s too much of a gentleman to take me up on it.

“Let’s go shopping,” he says. He nods, as though he’s thinking it over. “Do we have to be in a hurry to get back to camp?”

I shrug. We probably should. “Dad will light up my phone if I’m not back in an hour or two.”

He nods and looks down at his watch. “It’s almost lunchtime.” He grins. “I think it’s time for our third date.”

I roll my eyes and follow him out of the exam room. My knees are still wobbly from our near kiss. If he ever really kisses me, I’ll probably turn into a puddle on the floor.





Pete



I want to kiss her. I really, really want to kiss her. But I’m not even going to go there. Not until she’s ready. And it’s not because I’m afraid she’ll Cujo my ass. It’s because I really care about her. I have for a long time, and these past two days with her have only made me want to get to know her even more.

I remember when Logan brought Emily home for the first time. We laughed at him because she spent the night, and he’d had plenty of women in his bed, but he’d never, ever had one sleep over. He didn’t even have sex with her, not until weeks later, and she slept in his bed every single night. He fell head over heels in love with her. Immediately. Looking back on it, I remember trying to figure out what the f*ck he was thinking. Now I get it. There are some girls you sleep with. And then there are other girls you want to sleep with so badly that you hurt, but you don’t because they’re special.

We get out of the truck at the drugstore, and I walk around and take her hand in mine as we walk toward the sliding door at the entrance. She jerks her hand back, but I don’t let it go. I hold on tightly but gently. She startles, and I’m afraid for a second that she’s going to punch me again. But she takes a deep breath, steadies herself, and her grip relaxes in mine.