Caged (Mastered, #4)(9)

Cut him some slack.

Molly couldn’t believe she was about to do this. “The best way to remember your speech is to recall the high points.”

His gaze snapped back to hers. “The what?”

“High points. The most important thing you wanted to say.”

“I already did that when I said I was sorry.”

“And . . . ?”

“And I was a dickhead.”

“And . . . ?” she prompted more firmly.

“And I want to start over with you.”

“You had the chance to start over and you blew it when you stood me up.”

“You never let me explain.”

“You never tried,” she retorted. “You showed up at my house three times when I missed kickboxing class. But after you stood me up, all I rated was a lousy text message?”

“Technically, I didn’t stand you up.”

“Yes, you did. And it’s too late for excuses.” She ducked under his arm and pointed to the front door. “Go.”

“Not an excuse but an explanation. See . . . I was there that day, the day of our date, sitting in the parking lot, watching you.” He described her outfit in detail, along with her facial expressions. “I was a f*cking coward, staying in the car instead of coming in and telling you the truth.”

“Oh, that you suddenly remembered you weren’t attracted to me because I’m not a hot-bodied stripper?”

“Not. Even. Fucking. Close.” Deacon took a step forward with each terse word. “Maddox overheard our entire conversation in the dojo when I asked you out.”

Molly put her hands on his chest, stopping his advancement.

“He reminded me I needed to focus on my fight. When I told him my life off the mat wasn’t his f*cking business, he made it his business.” The muscle in his jaw flexed. “He went to Ronin. They pulled me from teaching to concentrate fully on MMA training. I was pissed as hell.” He paused to inhale a deep breath. “Mostly because they were right.”

“And?”

His blue eyes shimmered with regret. “And after the fight was over, I figured I’d grovel, but you’d already moved on. I worried I’d lost out on you to that * banker.”

Molly stared at him. This wasn’t the overly confident Deacon she knew. This man had vulnerability in his eyes as if he expected rejection. “It’s your career, Deacon. I could’ve handled you needing to focus on training. I would’ve been disappointed, but not angry and hurt.”

“Would you’ve gone out with Jake?”

Why did that bother him? “Would you have expected me to wait around until you were through with your fight?”

“Probably not.” He curled his hand around her face. “I can’t change the past, babe. I can apologize for it. Which I’ve done. I can ask you to forgive me for hurting you, which I’m doin’ now. And I can admit I want us to happen.” He offered a wry smile. “I did a shit job trying to get that across to you Saturday night.”

With Deacon close enough she could feel his body vibrating from nerves, she had a spark of hope this could be the beginning, not the end.

You’re such a sickening optimist.

No. You’re just a fool.

A fool about to take a big chance.

“Say something,” he urged.

“I only went on three dates with Jake and I didn’t sleep with him,” she blurted out.

Deacon eased back to look at her. “It kills me to ask this, but why not?”

“Because Jake didn’t do it for me. Like Fisher doesn’t do it for me. It’d be easier if . . .”

“If what?”

If other men did it for me, but they don’t. Not by half.

She’d tried, dammit. Telling herself over and over that other men besides Deacon were hot. Other men sported amazing bodies. Other men were inked with cool tats. Other men broadcast that don’t-f*ck-with-me vibe. Other men spoke with a sexy voice that hit the mark between rough as gravel and smooth as whiskey.

But when all of those attributes belonged to one man and that man owned them without apology?

Goodbye, other men.

“Molly. Tell me.”

She swallowed hard at the intensity in his eyes. “You do it for me in a bad way, Deacon McConnell. You always have. Even when you scared the crap out of me.”

Then he slanted his lips over hers and kissed her with tenderness. And he seemed as surprised by that as she was. “Give me another chance,” he said as he feathered kisses up her jawline. “I can figure out how to do this relationship shit.”


“That’s what you want? A relationship with me?”

“Yeah.”

In that moment, when their gazes collided, the heat in his eyes imparted a few things.

Sex with him would be raw. Borderline rough. Rarely tender.

There wouldn’t be candlelit dinners beforehand.

There wouldn’t be cuddling or spooning afterward.

Being naked with him would likely ruin her for sex with mere mortal men.

Those thoughts must’ve been easy to read on her face, because Deacon treated her to the most wicked grin she’d ever witnessed. “I see a whole lot of interest in those pretty brown eyes, and no fear.”