Brutal Vows (Queens & Monsters #4)(84)

“Stop fighting me. I’m not letting you go. And don’t close your eyes, goddammit!”

“Will you stop shouting into my face, please?”

I put my mouth right next to her ear and say hotly, “Your jealousy is misplaced. I’m not in love with anyone else.”

“I’m not jealous!”

She’s horrified by the suggestion, which makes me think I’m right.

It also makes me so fucking turned on, I want to rip that dress off and fuck here right here on the back seat.

I grab her head in both hands and kiss her again. She squirms, trying to get away, pushing against me until I pin her wrists together. Then I fist my other hand into her hair and kiss her again, this time groaning into her mouth with need.

“Quinn, stop. Let me go.”

“I’m never letting you go. There’s a contract that says I can’t.”

“You heartless bastard.”

“Look at me. Calm down and look at me, Reyna.”

Breathing hard, she turns her face away but glances back with a hostile, distrustful look.

Keeping my voice low though I’d like to shout at her, I say, “I’m not in love with anyone else. I’ll answer any questions you want me to, but first you need to understand that fact. I was infatuated with Riley, yes. I wanted there to be something between us, yes. But there wasn’t. I never even kissed the lass. Never touched her. She was under my protection, and I fucked it up so badly, she ended up shot. By me. Accidentally, but nevertheless, it was my bullet she took. So you’ll have to forgive me for being more than a little fucked up over that, Reyna, but I’m not in love with her. She’s not who I want.”

I press a soft kiss to her lips. “I have the woman I want, even if she does hate me.”

She stares at me in silence. Then, in a voice so low I can barely hear it, she says, “I don’t hate you.”

My heart pounding, I pull her closer and kiss her again. I kiss her all the way back into the city and right up until Kieran stops the car in the underground garage. Then I take my wife upstairs to the honeymoon suite and lock the door behind us.

I stalk toward her. Wide-eyed, she backs away from me.

“Don’t be afraid of me, Reyna. I swear on my mother’s grave, I’ll never harm you.”

“It’s just that every time I think I’ve seen your highest intensity level, you set a new record.”

The last thing I want is for her to think I’m in any way as psychotic as Enzo, so I point to a chair and order, “Sit. Fuck, I mean please sit down.”

I prop my hands on my hips and start to pace, because apparently, it’s the only way I know how to blow off steam without shooting something.

Reyna perches on the edge of the leather chair and watches me warily.

I stop in the middle of the room, blow out a hard breath, and close my eyes. “When I was nineteen years old, I fell in love with a married woman.”

“You don’t have to—”

“Be quiet. You’ll get your chance to talk.”

I don’t even have to look at her to know she’s murdering me with her eyes, but it doesn’t matter. Right now all that matters is that I clear the air between us. I need to get her naked and into bed, and that won’t happen if she’s still angry with me.

I walk over to the bar and pour myself a scotch. I chug it, then hold up the empty glass.

“No, thank you.”

“Suit yourself.” I pour another and drink that, too. Then I set down the glass, turn around, and fold my arms over my chest as I lean against the marble bar top.

I have no idea how to say what needs to be said, so I decide to try to get through it with as few words as possible.

I draw a slow breath, blow it out, then speak.

“Her name was Shannon. She was five years older than I was. We met at a rugby match. She told me she was married, but I didn’t care. I pursued her relentlessly. Eventually, she gave in.”

My laugh is low and humorless. “I can be very persistent when I want something.”

I’m lost in dark memories for a moment, then shake my head to clear it. Reyna watches me in taut, unblinking silence.

“Her husband found out. I don’t know how. I also didn’t know he was in the Serbian mafia.”

Reyna’s lips part. Her hands tighten around the arms of the chair.

She senses what’s coming.

I look right into her eyes when I make my confession.

“He killed her for her betrayal. Slit her throat and left her body on my front lawn. Then he went to my parents’ house, first thing that same morning. They were still in bed when he put a bullet in both their heads.”

I’m keeping it together until the next part, where my voice breaks.

“He killed my little sister, too. Slit her throat the same way he did Shannon’s. Police said later she didn’t die right away. Took her a while to choke to death on her own blood. Hannah was twelve.”

Reyna lifts her hands to cover her mouth.

I close my eyes again so I don’t have to see the look of horror in hers.

“Next he went to my grandparents’ houses. He bound them and lit the house on fire, same thing with both. All four of them were burned alive.”

Reyna says faintly, “Oh God. Quinn.”

“Don’t call for God yet. It gets worse. My older sister lived with her husband and three young children. The husband he tied up and bludgeoned to death. All three kids he shot at point-blank range. I won’t tell you what he did to my sister. She was a very pretty girl. Then he went through the rest of my family, one by one, picking them off like fish in a barrel. Aunts. Uncles. Cousins. Their kids, husbands, and wives. By the time he was through, forty-two people had been murdered. My entire family tree was wiped out. Because of me.”