Bride for a Night(168)

Could they have been more than mere figments of her imagination?

She shook her head. “If you truly did glance my way, you were excessively discreet,” she said dryly. “I would have wagered my father’s last quid you had never so much as noticed me, let alone recalled my name.”

“I did not wish to admit my interest, not even to myself,” he smoothly retorted.

“Why? Because I was the daughter of a mere merchant?”

“In part.” He wearily rubbed the back of his neck. “I am not proud of my snobbery, but I cannot deny that it played a role.”

Talia flinched, but she preferred his honesty to pretense. “And the other part?”

“I had made the decision that my wife would be chosen because of her suitability to assume the role of the Countess of Ashcombe and not because of my own wish to have her as my wife.” He held her startled gaze. “Indeed, I intended to ensure that I had no feelings for her whatsoever.”

She made a sound of disbelief. She had known that many members of nobility were satisfied with arranged marriages, but she had supposed that they must at least hope for a measure of affection.

Otherwise it was surely no more than a soulless business arrangement.

“You desired to be indifferent to your wife?”

“Utterly and completely.”

“But…” She struggled to follow any logic that would lead a man to a loveless marriage when he could surely have any woman he pleased. “Why?”

“It is difficult to explain,” he muttered, heaving a faint sigh as he studied Talia’s stubborn expression. He clearly did not have to read her mind to know that she was far from satisfied with his explanation. “You know that I was young when my father died and I inherited his title?”

“Yes,” she agreed slowly, searching his guarded expression as she wondered what the devil his father’s death had to do with their conversation. “I know that it was very difficult for you.”

“It was.” Pain darkened his eyes. “I had trained all my life to become an earl, but I was still overwhelmed by the sense of responsibility that I was forced to shoulder. Suddenly I had servants and tenants who were all depending upon me to take care of them.” He shuddered. “And then there was my family.”

“It is a wonder you did not bolt.”

He gave a sharp laugh. “Believe me, I considered the notion more than once,” he admitted. “Only the knowledge that my steward would find me and drag me back by the scruff of my neck kept me from packing my bags.”

Despite her determination to nurture the angry resentment burning in her heart, Talia found herself unable to ignore the glimpse of the vulnerable young man who must have been terrified by his father’s sudden death.

“Whatever your uncertainty, you have obviously accepted the need to fulfill your duties,” she said.

He smiled, as if genuinely pleased by her approval. “Over the years I have come to accept my position. I hope that my father would have been proud of what I have accomplished.”

She blinked. Good heavens. Surely he did not doubt his skills as an earl?

“Of course he would be proud,” she insisted, barely resisting the urge to reach out and brush back a lock of his tousled golden hair. “Your servants and tenants not only respect you, but they are clearly prospering beneath your care.”

“Our care,” he gently corrected. “They might respect my leadership, but they adore you. You have not only earned their loyalty in just a few weeks, but I have discovered that they truly would lay down their lives to protect you. They were plotting to invade France when they realized you had been taken by Jacques Gerard. It was only because I swore that I would return you safely to Carrick Park there was no mutiny.”