Boiling Point (Crossing the Line #3)(65)

Polly worked to calm her breathing, to no avail, her head light with the temptation of him. It would be so easy to take the offered reins and continue along the same albeit gratifying path, but they couldn’t exist inside it forever. She didn’t want to. Not when they could be something even better. Something lasting. “I gave myself an orgasm before I left for Roanoke.” Her confession released in a single gust of breath, her words stunted by the anger that instantly shuttered his features. “After the way you touched me in the hallway, I had to—”

“Excuse me?” Austin moved toward her in slow, measured steps that were far more daunting than a full, barreling sprint might have been. His nudity made him larger, more real. Right there. Raw, sexual male animal with a score to settle, and the utmost capability to do it. When he reached her and didn’t stop, Polly had no choice but to back away until her bare bottom was wedged against the kitchen table—halting her progress. “That rule was set in goddamn stone,” Austin enunciated. “I was very clear. Break it and all bets are off.”

“So?” Lust dug its claws into her stomach. “What are you going to do about it?”

His head tilted to the left. “Turnabout is fair play, don’t you think, sweet?” Polly’s mouth went dry as he fisted his fat erection. Roughly. His thumb circled the head as he completed a choking slide of his grip. Such a tiny detail, and yet it caused yearning to weigh down her loins. An all-consuming requirement to be filled by his steel flesh. Have her body thrust into. Austin made a sound of misery at whatever he saw in her expression, closing his eyes. “I can’t even look at you while I f*ck myself or I’ll spill everywhere before you’ve had a chance to suffer.”

Heart twisting, Polly shook her head. “You don’t want to make me suffer.”

“No, I don’t.” Austin shouted, releasing his distended arousal to advance on her, coming so close she bent backward over the table. “I don’t. But what else do I have? You stole the only way I know how to keep you.”

“No. No, that’s bull, Austin.” Her instinct was to hold him, pull him close, but if they touched in this state of frustration, they would give in to their attraction, and nothing would get solved. “You said all bets are off? Fine. That’s what I want.”

“I don’t understand,” he said, voice vibrating. “I thought you wanted control.”

“That’s what you told yourself, but it wasn’t just about me. You needed me to punish away your guilt, and I won’t do it anymore.” Swallowing her dancing nerves, Polly slipped her fingers into his hair and looked him in the eye. “What you gave me…I love how it made me feel. How it brought us together. But I won’t ever do it again—not until you stop feeling like you deserve it. You don’t.”

She couldn’t read him for long, scary seconds, his face carved from stone as he scrutinized her. Relief filtered into her chest when he finally responded. “You have no idea what I’d do to become even slightly worthy of you, Polly. Even if every failed attempt shaved five years off my life, I’d jump in headfirst every time.”

God, she was staggered under the weight of that confession, but it was a weight she wanted. Needed. “You don’t have to do anything. You’re already there,” she breathed, shaken. But it wasn’t enough. “I don’t always want to be in control. Sometimes I need…really need it to be you.”

Fire sparked in his eyes, his nostrils flaring. She felt rather than saw his hands curl into fists at her thighs before they lifted to grasp her hips in an unforgivable grip. “Shall we start by evening the score, then?” Her world blurred into a series of colors as Austin spun her around, shoving the upper half of her body face-first onto the kitchen table. She only had time to glimpse the wooden cooking spoon she’d left on the table a second before he picked it up, the movement almost thoughtful. His heat left her only a moment before she felt the unmistakable sensation of smooth wood sliding down her back. It lingered at her bottom a moment before Austin struck it against her flesh, eliciting a sharp slap. “I will still receive the occasional punishment, when it’s what you need. But there will be times where I reciprocate. Are we in agreement?”

“Yes,” Polly managed, excitement careering through her veins. “Agreed.”

“That’s very good, sweet, because I’ve already got one lined up.” Austin’s fingers tangled in her hair, holding her cheek down against the cool surface. Again, the spoon landed with a smack against her backside. “This is for being born with an ass that turns men, including me, into animals.”

Her fingers curled on the table. “Y-you’re punishing me for something I have no control over?”

“I never said my reasons were rational.” With one wing-tip-clad foot, he nudged her feet wider, leaving her with nothing to hide. “When it comes to you, I don’t possess a single rational thought. I’m 100 percent f*cking irrational over you.”

When she felt the concave smoothness of the spoon cup her core, a perfect fit, she whispered his name, eyes squeezing shut. “Austin…”

“Symbolic, isn’t it? Since I’d eat your * for every meal?” He flipped the spoon over, moving it in a gentle sawing motion, smoothing the wood over her clit. “But we were talking about this ass of yours, and I’m far from finished. It’s flexing for me right now. Do you even notice it? Or did the gods build that feature into you hoping it might torture me to death?”