Beautiful Darkness(126)

It was all I needed to hear. I grabbed for the ropes, loosening the knots that bound Lena and her mother together. Lena was barely conscious, her body resting on the freezing stone. I touched her. Her skin was ice cold, and I felt the choking grip of the Dark Fire as my body started going numb.

“Lena, wake up. It's me.” I shook her, and her head rolled from side to side, her face red from the icy rock. I lifted Lena's body, wrapping my arms around her, giving her what little warmth I had.

Her eyes opened. She was trying to speak. I held her face in my hands. “Ethan —” Her lids were heavy, and her eyes shut again. “Get out of here.”

“No.” I kissed her as I held her in my arms. No matter what happened, it was worth this one moment. Holding her again.

I'm not going anywhere without you.

I heard Link scream. One Incubus had escaped the powerful wall of light that was holding the rest of them at bay. John Breed was behind Link, with his arm around Link's neck, canines bared. John still had the same glazed expression, like he was on autopilot. I wondered if it was an effect of the intoxicating fumes. Ridley turned and threw herself onto John's back, tackling him. She must have taken him by surprise, because Ridley wasn't strong enough to take him down on her own. The three of them fell to the ground, grappling for the upper hand.

I couldn't see more than that, but it was enough to make me realize we were in serious trouble. I didn't know how long the supernatural field would hold, especially if Macon was the one generating it.

Lena had to end this.

I looked down at her. Her eyes were open, but she looked past me, as if she couldn't see me.

Lena. You can't give up now. Not when —

Don't say it.

It's your Claiming Moon.

It's not. It's her Claiming Moon.

It doesn't matter. It's your Seventeenth Moon, L.

She stared up at me, her eyes empty.

Sarafine raised it. I didn't ask for any of this.

You have to choose, or everyone we care about could get killed here tonight.

She looked away from me.

What if I'm not ready?

You can't run from this, Lena. Not anymore.

You don't get it. It's not a choice. It's a curse. If I go Light, Ridley and half my family will die. If I go Dark, Gramma, Aunt Del, my cousins — they'll all die. What kind of choice is that?

I held her tighter, wishing there was a way I could give her my strength or absorb her pain.

“It's a choice only you can make.” I pulled Lena to her feet. “Look at what's happening. People you love are fighting for their lives right now. You can stop it. Only you.”

“I don't know if I can.”

“Why not?” I was shouting.

“Because I don't know what I am.”

I looked into her eyes, and they had changed again. One was perfectly green, and one was perfectly gold.

“Look at me, Ethan. Am I Dark, or am I Light?”

I looked at her, and I knew what she was. The girl I loved. The girl I would always love.

Instinctively, I grabbed the gold book in my pocket. It was warm, as if some part of my mother was alive within it. I pressed the book into Lena's hand, feeling the warmth spread into her body. I willed her to feel it — the kind of love within the book, the kind of love that never died.

“I know what you are, Lena. I know your heart. You can trust me. You can trust yourself.”

Lena held the tiny book in her hand. It wasn't enough. “What if you're wrong, Ethan? How can you know?”

“I know because I know you.”

I let go of her hand. I couldn't bear to think of anything happening to her, but I couldn't stop it from coming. “Lena, you have to do it. There's no other way. I wish there was, but there isn't.”

We looked out over the cavern. Ridley looked up, and for a second I thought she saw us.

Lena looked at me. “I can't let Ridley die. I swear she's trying to change. I've already lost too much.”

I already lost Uncle Macon.

“It was my fault.” She clung to me, sobbing.

I wanted to tell her he was alive, but I remembered what Macon said. He was still Transitioning. There was a possibility he still had Darkness within him. If Lena knew he was alive and there was a chance she could lose him again, she would never choose to go Light. She wasn't capable of killing him a second time.

The moon was directly over Lena's head. Soon the Claiming would begin. There was only one decision left to make, and I was afraid she wasn't going to make it.

Ridley appeared at the top of the steps, breathless. She hugged Lena, taking her from me. She rubbed her face against Lena's wet cheek. They were sisters, for better or worse. They always had been. “Lena, listen to me. You have to choose.” Lena looked away, pained. Ridley grabbed the side of her cousin's face, forcing Lena to look at her. Lena noticed right away. “What happened to your eyes?”

“It doesn't matter. You need to listen to me. Have I ever done anything noble? Have I ever let you sit in the front seat of the car a single time? Have I ever once saved you the last piece of cake, in sixteen years? Ever let you try on my shoes?”

“I always hated your shoes.” A tear rolled down Lena's cheek.

“You loved my shoes.” Ridley smiled and wiped Lena's face with her scraped and bloody hand.