Bang (Black Lotus #1)(64)
To ward off the pleasure in his touch is a doomed feat as I lie here, restrained, weak to everything he’s giving me until I feel the wet heat between my legs as I crash into fragments of pure warmth as it trills through my core and down my limbs. A glittering fire sparking inside of my veins, taking my body captive as I writhe under his touch, our hands clenched together.
All I can think in this moment is that this man is obscene.
He doesn’t give me a chance to gather all the pieces he just broke me into when he jerks me up and pushes me to sit on my heels as he stands on his knees before me. Fisting my hair in each of his hands, he yanks my head back, looks down at me, demanding, “Suck my cock with that sweet mouth of yours,” before forcing my head down, but I take him willingly into my mouth. He doesn’t give me any control as he tugs my hair, bobbing me up and down the length of him. I begin to fight his demanding ways, pushing my head back against his hands, wanting to move more slowly, but he’s much stronger than me with my hands bound behind my back.
“Don’t fight me, Nina,” he grunts, but I want to. I want to fight him and he feels it, yelling in scolding grit, “Yield to me!”
But I don’t and he pulls my hair harder, biting on his sulfurous voice, “Yield to it. Trust me, baby.”
The whisper of his pleading demands seep out through the cracks of his words. He doesn’t know I hear it, but I do, and something about it makes me turn it over to him, giving him the control he so desperately needs for some reason. He moves me along the heat of his large cock as I let my tongue glide along the silky smooth flesh. The sounds spurring from him are nothing but primal lust, and when I feel him thicken in my mouth, he throws me back on the bed, straddles his knees on either side of me, pulling off a couple of hard pumps, right before he shoots his cum onto my stomach and tits. His eyes are pinned to mine as he spreads himself on me while he continues to jerk himself off. I watch him—he’s beautifully brutal with his merciless touch.
He keeps my arms tied behind me as he lies down next to me and pulls me into his hold, hugging me against his strong body. I’m completely vulnerable to him, naked and restrained, but I’m not scared. He punished me, yes, but he’d never really hurt me. He keeps telling me to trust him, and I can at least trust knowing that I’m safe with him, so with my hands bound, my body goes limp, molding to his as he holds on to me.
We lie there together, his cum drying on my skin, as he combs his fingers through my hair, saying, “I only want to smell myself on you,” before he reaches behind me and unknots his tie.
As soon as my hands are free, I sling my arms around his neck, needing the comfort and not quite knowing how to react after what just happened between us. He cradles the back of my head, pressing his lips to my ear, whispering, “I’ve got you, darling.” And when I nod my head against his as I cling to him, he strengthens his hold on me as he breathes into my skin, “I adore you.”
My emotions are all over the place, and I don’t know what to do with the feelings that overcome me. It’s a sickening delight. I hate that he enjoys this with me, that he looks at me the way he does. But I really hate that I can’t escape with him. He doesn’t allow me that freedom and it scares the shit out of me. My heart continues to race as I lie here, and he feels it, keeping me close to him and giving me a soft, “Shhh,” in my ear. He holds me in his arms in a nurturing way, but Declan is far more primal than nurturing, yet somehow he’s able to blur those lines in moments like this.
“I missed you,” he eventually tells me.
“I missed you too,” I sigh. “But he’s gone, so I’m all yours.”
“I don’t just want you to be mine when he’s gone, Nina. I want it all the time.”
“It’s complicated, but I’m here with you, and I just want you now. No Bennett, please,” I urge.
Declan moves to kiss me, keeping his touches soft and affectionate, as we slowly move together. And with his lips against mine, he mumbles, “How are you feeling? Did I hurt you?”
“No.”
“I need you to know that I will always protect you,” he says, his words reminiscent of my father’s when I was younger, and when I pull away to look in Declan’s eyes, I can see the truth behind them.
“I know,” I tell him. “Trust comes hard for me, but I’m trying.”
“Love that.”
I smile at my manipulations as they come so easily with him. It’s like I don’t even have to think or try; I just speak and he’s putty in my hands. Eventually we fall asleep before waking a couple hours later. Declan orders up some food, and I lie, telling him that I need to be home because Bennett wanted to video chat later and he would know if I wasn’t at our place. Declan is frustrated but we agree that we will get together tomorrow and spend these next two weeks together as much as possible. Truth is, I have to go to Pike tonight.
Before I leave, Declan installs an app on my cell phone that will allow us to text without anything being tracked by phone records. His possessive ways make me laugh, but I’m curious to know why he is the way that he is.
IT’S NEARING MIDNIGHT and my stomach is in knots when I pull up to Pike’s trailer. I turn the car off and sit for a moment; the sounds of the sharp wind blowing over the snow-covered ground fill the silence. My nerves keep multiplying the longer I sit here. I’ve known that this day would eventually come, but the realness that it’s finally here pangs in my gut.