Bang(96)

“Fuck,” he moans in a sensual brute as we both come together.

Holding me close to him, my body begins to tremble in fiery aftershocks. I’m wrapped all around Declan when he eventually pulls his head back. Our breaths are erratic and labored as we try to find our way back down.

In a staggered voice, Declan pants, “I want to make you into everything you’ve ever dreamed of being.”

And with those words, I don’t need any convincing.

Fuck Bennett.

Fuck the revenge.

Fuck it all.

I have everything I’ll ever want right here inside of this beautiful man.





I HAVEN’T GONE to see Pike yet. I know I have to, but I’ve been afraid about how he’s going to react to the news that I want out of this. Bennett has been back in town for the past few days, and I find myself caring less and less about playing his wife. For me, it’s over, but I feel I can’t walk out until I talk to Pike.

I’ve seen Declan every day since Bennett has returned, and to say he’s growing impatient with me is a severe understatement. My excuses are wearing thin, so I finish getting ready to drive out and tell Pike the new plan—the plan that will, for the first time, leave him without me by his side.

The guilt is insurmountable at this point. How do you tell the man, who is probably in love with you, and the one who has been your protector for the past twenty years, that it’s no longer the two of you? That you’ve fallen in love and want to be with that other person? Pike and I have always been together, always honest with each other, until now. I told him I didn’t love Declan, but I knew he could see right through me. See deeper than even I could at that point. I knew I cared for Declan, that he was a friend that I was being drawn to, but I hadn’t yet realized that I had already fallen for him. Pike already knew though; that’s how connected we are.

The house phone rings as I throw on my sweater, and when I answer, it’s Manuel from downstairs.

“Mrs. Vanderwal, I’m sorry to disturb you, but there’s a gentleman here saying he’s a cousin of yours.”

“What?” I question, wondering who the hell is down there, and then I hear the unmistakable voice of Pike, arguing, “Dude, just let me go up.”

“Yes, please, Manuel,” I quickly interject as rampant fear streaks through me. “Go ahead and send him up.”

My nerves crash, confounded as to why the hell Pike would come here. Never has he come here. We agreed from the start that our paths would never cross outside of Justice, so as I pace the foyer, waiting for his knock, I try to grapple with my thoughts and compose myself, all the while knowing what I must tell him.

When the knock comes, I open the door, grab his arm, and yank him inside, snapping, “What the f*ck are you doing here?”

But his eyes don’t meet mine, instead they scan around the room, taking in my home of the past four years. “Holy shit,” he murmurs. “So this is where you’ve been while I’m rotting away in that shit tank?”

“Pike, what are you doing here? Are you crazy? What if Bennett was home?”

“Relax, Elizabeth. I’ve been sitting outside all morning waiting for that shit-stain to leave,” he says, walking past me and into the dining room. “So . . .” he starts, letting the word linger as he drags a finger down the length of the cherry wood dining table, “. . . where the f*ck have you been for the past month?” His words scrape out in frustration.

“I-I’m sorry. I ju—”

“Cut the shit. You told me Bennett was going to be out of town this past week, yet you never once came by to see me. Why is that?”

“Pike, please,” I say on a shaky voice as chills run down my trembling arms, scared shitless with what I’m about to reveal.

“Please? What the f*ck is going on with you, Elizabeth?!” he shouts, his voice booming through the open space as he slams his fist against the table. “You used to run to me the second Bennett left, you used to beg for my dick, but now, when you do finally decide to show your face, you rush out the door.”

“Why are you screaming at me?!” I yell.

“Because you’ve got a job to do and it isn’t getting done!” He walks the edge of the table and back over to me, but when he gets close, I take a step back. “Why isn’t it getting done?”

My pulse races as I stutter out the words I’ve been afraid to say to him. “B-Because . . .”

“Because why?” he hisses as he glares at me.

Swallowing hard, I force out the words, “Because I want out.”

His jaw locks and he begins a rhythmic clenching and unclenching of his hands, fisting them at his sides. He takes a moment before he breaks the silence, seething, “What do you mean you want out?”

“Pike, please don’t flip out on me,” I say, trying to keep my voice calm.

“What do you mean you want out?”

“I can’t . . . I can’t do this anymore.” My face grows hot with the tears that threaten.

“It’s Declan, isn’t it?”

“I’m so sorry, Pike. I never thought—”

“You’re nothing to him but an illusion, Elizabeth,” he says, cutting me off.

“I love him.”

My confession sparks a fury in his eyes, and when he takes another step towards me, I take another back, pissing him off.