All I Want(85)

“You’re right. But as I said, things change. I’ve changed.” He tipped her face up to his and looked into her eyes. God knows what he saw there. Most likely a good amount of stubbornness because his gaze lit with wry humor . . . and damn. She’d missed him so much. She had to bite her lip to keep the words. He wasn’t getting her words, none of them, not a single one.

“Okay,” he said gently. “How about this instead—I’ll talk, you listen.”

She lifted a shoulder, as if to say: Look at me not caring, even as her pulse pounded as though she’d been running uphill.

He smiled; she could feel it against her jawline where he bent to nuzzle her, making her knees weak, damn him.

“You’re right,” he murmured. “I’m not an open book, not even close. You’re not the only one who carefully guards their heart, Zoe. It’s my default mode and it’s going to take me some time to get this right. I’m going to need some patience here, and you might even have to smack me upside the back of the head once in a while.”

“Only once in a while?” she asked.

He set a finger on her smart-ass lips. “No, you’re just listening now, remember? I’m being as open and honest as I know how here, babe. With you more so than I’ve ever been with anyone else.”

At that, she felt her heart melt more than a little. She stared into his eyes and saw that he spoke the truth. While her mind was spinning over that, he reached over and shut off the oven.

“Hey,” she said.

“Just making sure we don’t burn the place down while we figure this out,” he said, and while she scrambled for something appropriately scathing to say, he apparently decided he was done standing. He kicked a chair away from the table and sank into it, pulling her down on top of him.

“There’s nothing to figure out,” she said, the words not quite having the impact intended since she was straddling his lap. “I threw myself at you. And you shut yourself off from me. You were gone for a week. Seven damn days, Parker, and I spent every last one of them pining away for you.”

A full, genuine smile curved his mouth at this. “Pining? You?”

She crossed her arms, feeling pissy. “I didn’t mean that. Forget I said that.” She huffed out a breath. “I just missed you, dammit. A little.”

He was still grinning when he gripped her hips in his big hands and yanked her in closer so that not even a piece of paper could fit between them. “You going to run scared?” he asked.

She gaped at him. “You’re the one who let me go! You took off! You’re the big, fat baby here, not me.”

He went very serious. “And I’ll regret that to my dying day, Zoe. I was an idiot, a complete dumbass. I know that now. I want to be a part of your life. If I’m being honest, I want to be the most important part.”

“My life is in Sunshine,” she said.

“I get that. I’m interested in having a home base, too, but you’ve got to know that the home base I’m thinking of is you. Not a house. Not a town. You. As long as you’re with me, I don’t care where we live. Now it’s your turn. You’ve got to give me something here, a crumb, anything. I’m a desperate man, Zoe.”

She blew out a breath, feeling the last of her fear drain away as her heart bloomed and opened, warming her from the inside out. “You’re a better detective than this,” she said quietly. “I’ve managed to sabotage every single relationship that’s come my way except for the one I have with you. You’re the one I want. I love you back, Parker. Don’t ever doubt that.”

“God, Zoe.” He touched his forehead to hers. “I don’t know what I ever did to deserve you, but I plan on spending the rest of my life proving to you I’m worth it.”

It was the Parker James equivalent of begging on bended knee. She drew in a deep breath and then nearly had heart failure when Darcy stuck her head in the kitchen.

“Sorry,” she said, not looking sorry at all. “But I have to get home and I don’t want to leave before the show’s over. Can we fast-track it to the ending?”

Zoe stabbed a finger at the door and Darcy flashed a grin. “Fine. I’m out.” She took the time to point at Parker and then back at her own two eyes, mouthing I’ve got my eyes on you . . .

When she was gone, Parker looked at Zoe. “My sister has nothing on nosiness compared to yours.”

“Nope.”

He gave her a little smile. “She loves you.”

“Yep.” Zoe squeezed him tight. “Where were we?”

“You were about to spill your guts to me,” he said.

“I’m glad you came back,” she said. “Took you long enough.”

“I tried not to come back,” he said with a low laugh. “Christ, I tried.”

“I know.” With a little laugh of her own, she rested her head on his chest so she could admit this part without having to hold his gaze. “And I tried not to care.”

His voice had a wry smile in it as he hugged her into him. “We deserve each other.”

“Yes, we do.” His hands slid down her back to cup her ass, and she felt her body rev. She lifted her head. “Maybe we should go upstairs and give each other what we deserve.”