All I Believe (Firsts and Forever, #10)(52)

I smiled at him and said, “Fair enough. No, not really. What about you?”


“Me neither. Shit, that conversation went nowhere fast.” He very slowly slid almost all the way out of me, then pushed back in, burying himself to the hilt again. I moaned softly and he said, “That little mewl is not helping.”

“That wasn’t a mewl, it was a moan.”

“Oh, it was a mewl, and it was f*cking adorable.” He repeated the long, slow slide in and out. “Let’s talk about something else.”

I caressed his back and cupped his ass with both hands. When I squeezed his butt cheeks and pulled him deeper into me, a tremor went through him. “Like what?”

He hovered above me, his thick hair falling over one eye. “That thing you’re doing to my ass isn’t helping.”

“So just cum already! Then we can get to rounds two through fifty-six.”

He laughed at that. “Fifty-six! Are you trying to kill me?”

“We have the next two weeks, this house, and this bed. Four times a day sounds reasonable, right?”

He began moving in and out of me with slow, contained thrusts as he brushed my hair back from my face with a gentle touch. “Actually, when you put it that way, the number’s probably a bit low.”

“Good job,” I said.

“With what?”

“You’ve been f*cking me for over a minute and haven’t cum in me yet.” I flashed him a big smile.

That made him chuckle. “The sex math was a good distraction. It’s tough to reach orgasm while you’re working out sums in your head.”

“So, there you go.”

He was still moving in me slowly, sliding almost out and pushing all the way back in, sending waves of pleasure through me every time he brushed my prostate. I began rocking my hips, just a little, and he whispered, “Oh f*ck,” then began thrusting in me harder and faster. Luca slid his arms around my shoulders as he took me, his eyes again locked with mine. My foot had slid off his shoulder, so I wrapped both my legs around him and pushed up with my hips to meet each thrust.

He was in me so incredibly deep, bottoming out in me with each thrust, his body rubbing my hard cock, and I cried out as I came unexpectedly, my balls tightening up and my ass clenching his shaft as I shot a huge load all over my body. That was all it took to finish Luca off, and he came with a low moan, his beautiful face flushed and his full lips parted as he pushed himself into me again and again.

It took us both a while to recover, and he kissed me tenderly, his cock still in me for quite a while afterwards, his weight on me comforting and reassuring (though his knees and elbows supported most of it). “Have I mentioned how much I missed you?” he asked before kissing my cheek and neck.

“You might have said something about that,” I told him with a lazy grin. “I missed you too. I enjoyed the letters, though. Thank you for writing to me.”

“I’m glad you liked them.” He kissed my bare shoulder, then reached between us and held the condom in place as he eased himself from my body. After cleaning me up with the towel, he discarded the condom and cleaned himself, too, then pulled the fluffy, white duvet over us and settled in comfortably.

As I curled up in his arms, I asked idly, “Do you ever bottom?”

“Oh! Shit, we’ve never talked about this! I’m so sorry. I thought you wanted to bottom, it seemed like we just naturally gravitated to that.”

“I do. I was just curious. I’ve never topped and I guess I just sort of wondered about you.”

“Never?”

I shook my head. “My ex wouldn’t even entertain the notion.”

“Why didn’t you have sex with any of the men you dated before Erik?”

I shrugged and said, “Fear, mostly. Aside from this current bit of idle curiosity, I’ve always just wanted to bottom, and I thought it would hurt to be f*cked. I was right, too. It hurt like hell the first few months of our relationship, until I learned how to relax and take him.”

“That f*cking *,” Luca mumbled, his voice low.

“He is, but why the sudden need to cuss him out?”

“Because he hurt you. He didn’t prepare you properly, or guide you through it. If he had, it wouldn’t have hurt like that.”

I thought about that before saying softly, “I wish you’d been my first. I’m glad you were my first kiss, at least. That’s always been my fondest memory.”

His arms tightened around me and he kissed my forehead. “I wish I could have been your first, too. But if I’m very, very lucky,” he said softly, “maybe I’ll end up being your last.”

I looked up at him as the full meaning of his words sunk in. I asked, my voice almost a whisper, “What happens after these two weeks, Luca? What are we going to do?”


“I have absolutely no idea, but I’m no good without you, Nicky. When we’re not together, all I do is miss you like crazy and count the hours until we’re together.”

“I’m the same way.”

“Really?” I nodded, settling onto his chest again, and he told me, “We’re going to figure this out, Nico. I have no idea how, but we’re going to figure out how we can be together when these two weeks are up and reality crashes into us like a freight train.” There was something in the way he said that, a graveness in his voice that made me look up at him. Somehow, I didn’t think he was just talking about the fact that we lived on different continents.