Aflame (Fall Away #4)(68)

“I got her first,” he teased. “Sorry.”

He wasn’t at all sorry, judging by the shitty-ass grin on his face, but it was okay. I stared at the tightly wrapped pink bundle in Madoc’s big arms, looking like nothing more than a little loaf of bread, and I tried to wrap my brain around the fact that that was my sister.

I couldn’t even see her, she was so buried in blankets.

Tate stayed at my side, and I could feel my mom watching me as Jax veered around to go to Madoc’s side.

“Hey, Quinn Caruthers,” he sang, putting a gentle hand on her head.

Madoc looked at her with awe, already in love, while Jax loomed at his side, and I could tell he was itching to get her into his arms.

I didn’t know why I felt like a third wheel. I glanced at my mom, who was watching me with patience.

“All of her brothers.” She reminded me, urging me with her eyes to go get a closer look at the baby.

I inhaled a deep breath and walked over, flanking Madoc’s other side as I dropped my eyes and took in the little bit. The little bit of nothing who was already succeeding in making my knees buckle.

“Isn’t she perfect?” Madoc said holding her up on his forearms in front of his body, so we all could see.

And everything inside of me gave way.

My chest splintered in a hundred different cracks, my hands tingled, and what I felt was almost a craving to hold her.

Her glistening eyelids covered her eyes in sleep, so I couldn’t tell their color, but the rest of her had a reddish tint that made her look like she’d been through the ringer today.

Her plump new cheeks looked soft and fragile, her nose was no bigger than my pinky nail, and the little triangle gap between her lips as she breathed—every little thing—felt like it was digging its way into my heart. I reached out, unable to resist slipping my finger into her fist.

How could anything be so little?

The tiny fingers—as frail as matchsticks—wrapped around my finger, and my throat swelled, and I tried to swallow against the painful ache, but it was too much.

“We’re your brothers, little girl,” Jax cooed.

“Yeah.” Madoc laughed. “You’re so screwed.”

Everyone laughed, high off the rush of a new baby, but I was falling. The blanket shifted, and I looked down to see her little feet nudge their way out.

“Jesus, she’s little,” I breathed out, amazed. I looked up. “Mom, I . . .”

But my mom was crying, tears streaming down her face, and I immediately felt like shit that I hadn’t gone to her first.

“Are you okay?” I asked, trying to slip away from Quinn’s little fist, but it was no use.

She shook her head clear, smiling. “I’m on top of the world,” she assured me. “The picture I’m looking at right now couldn’t be more perfect.” And she started crying again, looking at Madoc, Jax, and me. Jason brought her head into his chest, looking completely disheveled himself.

“She’s going to be a blonde,” he pointed out, referring to his new daughter.

“How do you know?” Jax asked, curious.

“Because she’s practically bald. Just like Madoc was.”

Madoc snorted and shot his dad an annoyed look.

I put my hand on top of her head, amazed at how it fit in my palm. I felt Tate watching me and looked up to see a smile in her eyes.

“You want to hold her, Jared?” my mom spoke up.

I shook my head. “I don’t think—”

But Madoc was already on me, handing her off. I brought my arms up, feeling them shake under the weight of her weightlessness.

“Oh, shit.” I breathed hard.

“Language.” I heard my mom’s faint mumble.

Madoc took his arms away, slowly lowering her head into the crook of my arm, and even though she weighed nothing, I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to hang on to her.

Different from any other feeling I’d ever had.

I pinched my eyebrows together, studying every little inch of her sweet face.

“She’s so small,” I said more to myself than to the others.

“She’ll grow,” Jax commented, peering over my shoulder.

I shook my head, not believing that I was once that little. “So helpless . . .”

Tate finally appeared at my side and kissed her forehead. “A girl with you three as her brothers will be anything but helpless.” She laughed.

My chest suddenly shook, watching as her mouth opened in a little oval as she yawned, and—holy shit—I was going to die. Could she get any cuter?

I laughed so I wouldn’t cry. “I feel like my heart is breaking, and I don’t know why. What the hell?”

“It’s love,” I heard my mother say. “Your heart isn’t breaking. It’s growing.”

Tate wrapped her arm around my waist and leaned her head on my arm, both of us watching Quinn.

I leaned down, brushing a kiss on her cheek and inhaling her baby scent.

Jesus, I was pathetic.

“My turn,” Jax shot out, nudging in.

Reluctantly, I handed her off, careful to support her head. I was unnerved by how much I didn’t want to give her up.

Hell, I even hated the thought of ever having to leave Shelburne Falls again.

“Oh, God!”