Addicted to You (Addicted #1)(38)

“You,” I hear Lo’s voice.

The server’s shoes clank on the floor, coming towards us. Oh my God?! What is Lo doing? “What would you like?”

“Stop staring at my fucking girlfriend,” Lo says, topping it off with a bitter smile. “That’d be great, thanks.”

“Lo!” Poppy shrieks.

Rose is actually laughing. The world has gone mad. And I refuse to look at it, hiding underneath the covers, topless, my chest still pressed on the lounge chair.

“I wasn’t staring,” the server refutes with a tense voice, unmasking his emotions. “If you want something, I’ll gladly get it for you. If not, I’m going.”

“Great,” Lo says. “I’ll take a Fizz.”

“You mean a bourbon and Fizz?” he retorts in challenge. Oh shit.

“No, I mean a regular Fizz.”

The server says, “But you’ve been drinking bourbon all day, Mr. Hale. Are you sure you don’t want another one?”

“You’ve been drinking hard liquor all day?” Rose says, her voice suddenly flat.

“No,” I refute before Lo can. I peek from underneath my towel and glare at the server, finding some internal confidence for Lo’s benefit. “You must be mistaken. I’ve tasted his drink.”

The server eyes me for a long time, trying to read my expression, and I try to soften my gaze, as though telling him it will be worth his while. Or something. Anything. I mean, I moaned while watching him spout off menu items. And he saw it. That’s all I have to go on.

“Right,” the server says. He glances back at Lo with a knowing, satisfied look, thinking he’ll bed me later and really show up this rich prick. I don’t want him to, and I fear that he actually will. And I’ll let him. “I’ll get your drink—”

“Don’t,” Lo says, clipping my bandeau back. “I’d rather not drink spit with my Fizz, and we all fucking know that’s where this is headed. So leave.”

Poppy says. “You can cancel my order. I think it’s for the best if you stay inside.”

The server nods and disappears at her wish.

I stand immediately. “I’m going to the bathroom and maybe to the pool.” The words sound static and hurried, but no one questions them, except Lo. He collects his things and follows me indoors and to our cabin.

I don’t look at him. I head to the tiny, tiny bathroom and turn the one-person shower to freezing cold.

I hear clinking, and I glance back just as he gulps straight whiskey from the bottle. He licks his lips and wipes his mouth with the back of his hand, pissed. When his eyes meet mine, he finally says, “Did you orgasm?”

My entire body flushes. “Not really,” I mumble.

He nods to himself, staring dazedly at the ground. “Did you get aroused from me or him?”

I frown. “Does it matter?” I already feel awful about the whole event. “You shouldn’t have been teasing me like that, Lo. I’m already tense as it is.”

“I was trying to help,” he snaps.

“By making me want to have sex on the sun deck?!” I shout. “That’s not helping. You made the situation worse.”

His face twists in anger and hurt. He plops on the edge of the double bed and puts the bottle to his lips again. Then he says, “If you have sex with that fucking asshole, we’re done.”

I hesitate by the bathroom. “What?” My voice goes small. For some reason, I think he’s talking about our friendship. His glazed, reddened eyes tell me so.

He lets his words hang in the air while I internally freak out, imagining a world without him. So very alone.

“What do you mean, Lo?” My heart hammers.

“We’re done,” he says. “You really think your family will accept the fact that you cheated on me with the staff? No, we’ll have to break up.”

Our fake relationship, that’s what he’s talking about. I exhale. “I’ll be careful.”

His eyes narrow, heated. “So you’re going to sleep with him?”

I shrug. “I don’t have much of a choice.”

He shakes his head. “Un-fucking-believable.” He stands up and takes his bottle with him, turning his back on me.

“You don’t understand,” I start, quickly trying to defend what my body craves. “I can’t stop thinking about it, Lo. My legs are shaking. My hands are shaking. I feel like I’m being set in a blender. I just need someone...”

“Stop.” His voice sounds pained again. “Just…stop.”

I’m so confused. “What do you want me to do? I can’t go without it. You’re drinking!” It’s so unfair. “Why can’t I have sex?”

“Because we’re supposed to be together!” he yells. “You’re supposed to be my girlfriend.” Before I can ask him to elaborate, he goes to the door, purposefully trying to avoid my questions. “I’ll be at the pool.”





*


I spend most of the day shivering in a shower, trying to force myself to forget Lo and the male server and body parts. Self-love does nothing but frustrate me, and I sink to the cold tiles, crying the pain away.

Lo confuses me. Does he want to be with me? Or is he just afraid I’m going to ruin our lie? I can’t find the meaning to his words, no matter how hard I repeat them.