A Match Made in Bed (Spinster Heiresses #2)(33)

He spoke, his voice quiet and close to the door. “The hardest part of the future, Cassandra, is leaving what is known and trusted to move forward with courage. I know this is not the way you expected your life to unfold, but sometimes, expectations should be abandoned.” He walked away.

She listened to his booted steps echo on the hardwood floor and wondered what he meant. Was he talking about the kiss? Or did he sense her deeper turmoil?

Soren was no poet, and yet his words had perfectly captured the conflict inside her.

Or was he speaking of himself? Did he, too, wonder if he was making the right decision? After all, he was selling his title for money.

They would soon know, because, on the morrow, they would both be stepping into their futures.





Chapter 9




So, she hadn’t wanted him to kiss her the way he had that morning.

That was the reason she’d taken the matter into her own hands. Soren understood her motive as clearly as he knew his own name. What puzzled him was what she was afraid of. What she was thinking. Cassandra never acted without forethought, sometimes too much forethought.

For his part, kissing her had been all he could think about over dinner.

The kiss they had shared on the dueling field had made a difference. She’d responded to him. She’d not been experienced, but she had not held back. He wanted to believe her natural curiosity extended to the bedroom. This was a good thing, because Soren had no desire to be a monk and he wanted his wife to be his lover.

He understood the dangers of marriages of convenience. His parents had had one and they had come to detest each other. His mother had been from a good family of modest fortune. They had scraped together a sizable dowry to launch their daughter into Society. Soren knew it had been hard on her to watch her lazy albeit noble husband invest her money in silly schemes or gamble it away.

Meanwhile, his father had discovered he’d married a woman who was doomed to be perpetually disappointed. She was never satisfied, something that increasingly weighed on Soren.

He was their only child although he had a bastard brother and two bastard sisters. He wondered if Cass knew? It seemed to be a big secret in Cornwall, a place where secrets never stuck.

His half sisters were suitably and happily married. His half brother had a commission and served on the Peninsula. Soren had seen to their successful prospects. Not his father.

But there were things he needed to discuss with Cass, and they were topics that might not please her—such as his first marriage and his son.

Soren had no doubt Cass would find his mother a trial, just as he did. However, he hoped she bonded with his son. He’d mentioned Logan that morning to her. He’d told her that he wanted to save Pentreath for his son and she’d not made a comment . . . except now, on reflection, Soren wondered if she had fully understood what he’d meant. She might have thought he was speaking about a son in general, such as their son once they married.

He’d been preparing for bed. He now sat on the edge of the mattress, working over this new problem. It was quite possible Cass hadn’t registered much of anything that was said, what with the duel and the proposal.

Absolutely, now that Cass had agreed to marry him, he must speak to her about Logan before she heard any rumors. His son was his sole motive for doing what he must to save Pentreath. He was also the reason Soren needed to return home soon. Considering he’d had no choice but to leave Logan in his mother’s care, he’d already been gone too long.

So, when to talk to Cass?

There would be no time before the ceremony. Nor would he run the risk of Cass crying off. She was that independent-minded.

Should he have mentioned Logan before? Perhaps. But Cass had been so cold to him, there had not been an opportunity for private conversation.

He was also aware that she’d have a few questions about his late wife, Mary. And what would he say?

Soren lay back on the bed. Should he admit his bitterness toward Mary? She had attempted to rob him of Logan. He understood her justification. She’d decided she did not want their child to be raised in a white world. She’d been Lenape, and after he’d give up his commission, had suggested several times she wished him to return to her tribe with her. Soren had refused. He believed then, as he did now, their best opportunities were among his people.

Mary had disagreed and so she had never told him she was pregnant. She’d left and kept their son secret from him.

Soren stared at the ceiling, remembering the confusion, anger, and, yes, hurt he’d felt to return home and find his wife gone. He’d been away for a few days meeting with some gentlemen who wanted to help him open a trading post. She’d even instructed a neighbor to tell him not to come after her. She’d returned to her people.

He’d tried anyway. Mary had refused to see him—probably because by that time her pregnancy would have been showing—and it had made him very angry. He’d sacrificed everything for her.

However, time had calmed his temper. He could now blame himself for some of what happened. He’d been gone too often for a new bride. He’d left her in a culture that she understood but had not fully embraced. He should have understood how hard life was for her in the settlement.

And now he had a second chance at marriage.

He realized he truly wanted Cass. Even when she was prickly, and that was quite often. She knew her own mind, and she was exactly what Logan needed. She understood the manners and expectations of English Society. As MP Holwell’s daughter, she’d also been an outsider. She would give Soren good advice concerning his son. He also believed Mary would have liked her.