A Family Affair(3)

“The man you pulled out of the water has been in touch. He wants your name,” the officer said.

“He isn’t going to sue me, is he?” she asked.

“I don’t think so,” he said with a laugh. “He seems very grateful. He won’t have any trouble tracking you down but I said I’d ask. He probably wants to thank you.”

The man’s name was Chad. He was finishing up his PhD at Berkeley while she was working in a law office in the Bay Area. She was twenty-three and he was twenty-seven and she was not prepared for how handsome he was and of course much better put together than when he was dragged out of the water.

He took her to dinner and, as she recalled, their first date was almost like an interview. He wanted to know everything about her and was utterly amazed to learn she’d had a job as a lifeguard in a community pool for exactly one summer when she was a teenager and yet jumped in to save him with total confidence. They fell in love almost instantly. The first time they made love, he asked her to marry him. She didn’t say yes right away, but they knew from the start they were made for each other. What they didn’t know was how many fights they’d have. Very few big fights but many small ones; she thought of them as bickering. They fought about what was on the pizza; a scrape on the side of the car that was not her fault, not even remotely; what kind of vacation they should have and where they should go. As Anna recalled, they always went where Chad wanted to go. They fought about what movie to see, where to eat, what was grumbled under his or her breath.

They fought seriously about his affair. That was in the distant past but it took a long time to get over. Years. But when they finally pledged to stay married, to do their best to make it good, they fell into bed and had the best sex of their lives. And they had Elizabeth.

That experience was how she knew that all the excuses for this current marital rift, no matter what he called it, was probably about another woman and not them growing apart or having divergent needs. He wouldn’t admit it and she had no proof, but she had better than average instincts. She believed he’d gotten all excited at the prospect of falling in love and was rewriting their history to make that acceptable. He was looking for an excuse that would make it reasonable to step outside the bonds of marriage. She could feel it; he’d been involved with someone else.

Or maybe she hoped that was the problem because another possibility was more impossible for her to fix. He had seemed very angry with Anna, and she had watched that anger slowly build for the last three years. Ever since Anna had been selected to fill a vacancy on the Superior Court bench. He had sneeringly addressed her as your honor several times. Chad, she suspected, was jealous.

There was also the fact that Anna disagreed with him on political issues. He complained she didn’t show enough respect for his opinion. She complained that he didn’t listen to what she was saying, acted secretively. He didn’t think she was trying hard enough to be attractive; she’d put on a little weight and he said that showed she didn’t care. They’d lost their sexual edge and hardly ever had sex anymore. She couldn’t do or say anything right. At least the kids were no longer living at home. Anna and Chad had been at odds for about six months.

“Admit it, we have little in common anymore,” was one of the last things he said before leaving on his trip.

“Over thirty years, three children and quite a lot of history,” she had replied. “Not much, I suppose.”

So he booked a trip he said would help him clear his head. “When I get back, we should have a serious talk about our future,” he said. “We might have a lot of past but that doesn’t mean we have to be stuck in it. I’d like to sort out a few things.”

People kept streaming into the large room, many of whom Anna didn’t know. She was acutely aware that some would be clients of his, people who would never see him outside of the office except for an occasion like this. In fact, some of his clients might find themselves in a crisis, having their counselor die suddenly.

There would be a program, of course. While the pictures were rotating on the big screen, there was soft music playing. The bar was open but the food wouldn’t be brought out until after the speaking was done. They all agreed it should be brief and not open to those who hadn’t been asked to speak. Get it over with, Anna had said, and then people will either stay, eat and mingle or bolt, as is their preference.

“Ladies and gentlemen, if you’d take just a moment to freshen your drinks or grab a cup, we’ll be toasting our departed friend one more time after a brief tribute from his family,” Joe said. “Find yourselves a comfortable place to sit. I believe I received the honor of opening this program by virtue of the fact that, other than Chad’s siblings, I’ve known him the longest. I first encountered him in the eighth grade and while months and sometimes years separated us, we’ve managed to keep up with each other ever since. It’s been such a privilege to call myself his friend.”

Anna glanced over at Max Carmichael, the doctor who was the director of the counseling practice where Chad had worked for twenty years. Max not only offered to preside over a testimonial, he had clearly expected to be the one to do so. But the truth was Chad had hated him.

It was going to be Anna and the kids and Joe. Each one of them was going to tackle an important aspect of Chad’s character, deliver a short summary of love and devotion. Of course they couldn’t decide who did what without almost coming to blows, and at the same time Jessie was the only one who actually wanted to speak. Poor Mike was really hurting and it showed; he was Chad’s only son and they were very close. And little Bess, his baby, was shattered. The subjects to choose from were fought over like two dogs and one bone. Bess didn’t have a dog in that fight; she had made up her mind on what she wanted to say.