A Covert Affair (Deadly Ops #5)(58)

“You want hot tea?” He stood almost awkwardly in her foyer, watching her carefully.

She shook her head, touched by the question. His abuela had always made either of them hot tea whenever they’d felt under the weather or just had a bad day. “I’m okay. I think I just want to crash. You can call your friend or whoever that was to pick you up. Thank you for bringing me home, really, but you don’t have to stay.” She didn’t want to be an obligation to him. Nathan had such an honorable streak, and she wasn’t going to use that.

He just grunted what could have meant any number or responses before bending down and scooping her into his arms.

She yelped, looping her arm around his neck as he strode for the stairs with determined strides. “What are you doing?”

“Taking care of you.”

She appreciated it, but even so . . . “I can walk.”

He did that grunt thing again, refusing to look at her as he hurried up the stairs. Once they were in her bedroom, he set her down at the foot of her bed while he pulled back the covers. Sunlight streamed in from the open blinds, bathing the gold-and-blue duvet and the oversize canvas of the Miami skyline that hung above her bed.

Too many emotions flooded her. Despite what had gone down with them, despite the fact that things were potentially beyond repair between them, he was still taking care of her. When he picked up the short pajama set she’d tossed onto her chaise, she wrapped her arms around herself.

“Nathan, you really don’t need to stick around.” It was almost harder with him here, being so damn nice that she just wanted to cry all over again. She understood why he’d taken off last night, but she was also a little resentful. She’d never kept the truth from him to hurt him or because she hadn’t trusted him. She’d done it because she’d hated herself, had been drowning in ridiculous guilt. It had never been about him.

“I do.” There was no room for argument in those two words. “Change. You’ll feel better.” Then, taking her totally by surprise, he stripped off his jacket, shirt, and shoes. He left his pants on, though, making it clear that he wasn’t trying for more from her.

Instead of using the bathroom for privacy, she undressed by the chaise, leaving her clothes in a heap, even though she normally only left her pajamas out. She didn’t have the energy to put them in the hamper.

Nathan stood rigid by her bed, not even pretending to look away as she changed clothes. Hunger simmered in his gaze, nearly scorching her. She felt her body flare to life, knowing that all that need was for her. But he didn’t make a move for her as she approached the bed and collapsed onto it. Instead he rounded it and slid into the other side.

It depressed under his weight, but Amelia couldn’t make herself turn around to face him. Why the hell was he here? She couldn’t tell if this was obligation or maybe he was offering an olive branch between them. She hoped it was the latter, but that dark, bitchy voice in her head told her it wasn’t.

She was just an obligation, a duty. Now her sheets and bed would smell like him. She craved him even as she silently ordered him to leave, to get the hell out of her home. The longer she was around him, the harder it was going to be to move on when he disappeared from her life.

When his solid arm slid around her waist, tugging her close, she couldn’t even fight his hold. Didn’t want to. She settled against him, soaking up all his strength.

“I know I said it, but . . .” She cleared her throat, her voice seeming overpronounced in the quiet room. “If I could go back and change things, I would. I’m so sorry, Nathan. If you can’t forgive me, I’ll understand, though.”

He sighed, his grip tightening as his chin settled on top of her head. His masculine scent enveloped her. “It’s not about forgiveness. I do forgive you. You were fucking seventeen and hurting. I’d have to be a monster not to be able to let that go. It just kills me that you didn’t trust me. I would have done anything for you. Still would.” He murmured the last part so low she almost didn’t hear him.

Her throat tightened at his words. He forgave her, but it didn’t sound as though that was enough. Had she ruined everything with her fearful decision twelve years ago? She was too afraid to ask if they had a chance at a future. Hell, maybe she didn’t deserve one. More tears threatened, but this time she managed to rein them in. She would not cry again. At least not until she was alone.

“I need to ask you something.” She wasn’t sure how much time had passed when Nathan’s voice cut through the silence.

“Okay,” she whispered, feeling lethargic and beyond exhausted by now.

“We need you to get inside Mercado’s house again. One more date and Elliott should be able to get what he needs. He was damn close last time.” The steady cadence of his voice was normally soothing.

She went rigid in his hold. His words pissed her off. Maybe that was why he was still being decent to her. They still needed her. She almost let out a bitter laugh but held herself in check. A deal was a deal. Her jaw tightened. “I’ll do it.”

She figured after he’d gotten what he needed from her, then things would truly be over between them. Then she could move on for good.





Chapter 15


Babysitter: a bodyguard.





Sid paced in front of the faux fireplace in his condo. A fireplace in Florida was stupid, but it added to the ambience of his high-rise. At least that was what his bitch of a real estate agent had said. She hadn’t even liked him, but she’d still fucked him right in front of the damn fireplace after he closed on the condo. He’d bought it free and clear, so she’d known he had money. Maybe she’d thought she’d get gifts or jewelry out of him. People were always like that, wanting to take, take, take.