Wildest Dreams (Fantasyland #1)(156)

Oh my God.

“And now, ma cherie,” she kept going, her voice gentling, indicating she was not done delivering her death blows, “even though I do sense you are pleased that you are bound to this world and further bound to it through the child you carry, you must know that your husband orchestrated that as well. He did this without your knowledge and, until it came about and you decided to be pleased mostly because the deed was done and you had no choice, he also did it against your will.”

It was then I finally blinked again.

Then I whispered, “What?”

“This powder you took?” she asked, I nodded slowly and she went on. “It is quite powerful and nearly foolproof. However, you have not been taking it now for some time. He discovered it and switched it with a placebo with the intent to sire a child on you in order to safely deliver an heir to the throne of this nation.”

I felt every inch of my body lock.

No.

God. No.

Why would he do that?

“Why would he do that?” I breathed.

“He is a man,” Valentine answered gently, studied my face that I could actually feel was pale and then she continued. “Therefore, my goddess of love, your husband has been very busy. Your parents of this world have known of all of this since your return to them after the time you spent in the country. The three of them have known you are bound to this world everlasting and Princess Sjofn would never return. But it is only your husband, and one of his men who procured the placebo for you, that knows he has schemed behind your back to get you with child.”

I couldn’t believe this.

This was unbelievable.

Why would Frey do this? Any of it.

Why?

Memories clashed in my head. Atticus seeming so despondent when I couldn’t hit the target I knew now was not because he was disappointed in his Sjofn but because he was mourning the loss of his daughter. Both his and Aurora’s easy acceptance of me, acceptance they had no choice but to have for their Frey, their Drakkar had commanded the elves. All of them, including Frey’s quick and unreserved happiness I was pregnant without me having to say a word about remaining in this world, switching places with Sjofn and providing an heir to the throne.

God, I was so stupid, so blind, so involved in falling in love I didn’t even notice, didn’t think, didn’t piece it together – but this was because they all knew I was never leaving way before I did and way before I even knew I wanted to.

I felt my jaw clench and a red film descended over my eyes.

“That said…” Valentine’s voice came to me but I had stopped hearing her, nothing was penetrating the injured, infuriated fog filling my head.

I slowly stood and turned to round the bed.

“Seoafin,” she called but I ignored her and moved, my gait slow, my head feeling fuzzy, my eyes still seeing red.

“Seoafin,” I heard again and then I heard an angry mew from Penelope which could only mean that Valentine had stood but I kept going, my pace quickening. “Seoafin, my goddess of love, I’m not quite –”

But she didn’t finish because I was running to the door, out the door, down the hall, down the stairs, down the next flight, out the door and into the snow.

And as I blindly ran, I ran right into Ruben who caught me in his arms.

“Finnie, what are you doing outside without a cloak?” he asked and my head shot back, my gaze locked with his and his head jerked at what he saw.

“Where’s Frey?” I demanded to know.

“Finnie –” Ruben started, his eyes turning guarded as they took in my face, his hands coming to my upper arms, fingers curling around carefully.

“Ben, where… is… Frey?” I ended my question on a shriek and Ruben’s head jerked again as his fingers tightened.

Then he said gently, “Go inside, my princess, I’ll get him.”

“Fuck that,” I snapped, yanking free of his hold and ignoring his wince at my words. “Tell me where he is.”

“Fin –” he started, something caught his attention, he looked beyond me, his big body went tight and his eyes narrowed.

“Ben!” I yelled and his eyes snapped back to me. “Where the f**k is Frey?”

“Right here, wee one, what on earth is amiss?” I heard Frey ask and the minute I heard his voice, I turned on him.

Then I took him in as he moved toward me, his boots crunching in the snow and my heart squeezed, hard and tight, staying frozen like it was never going to pump again.

My beautiful husband. My sweet and gentle Frey. The man I loved. The man whose child I was carrying. The man who had lied to me and irrevocably changed the course of my life… twice… without bothering to discuss it with me.

“Frey, there’s a wo –” Ruben started to say in a low tone but I cut him off.

“You unbelievable ass**le!” I shrieked, Frey’s brows shot together over narrowed eyes as he stopped walking about four feet from me and his body went still.

“Finnie, what –?” he started.

“Fuck you!” I spat, leaning forward to do it. “Fuck you, Frey! I cannot f**king believe you!”

“Frey –” Ruben said quietly, Frey’s eyes unlocked with mine, he looked around me, he focused on something in the distance, I saw his face go hard but I ignored all of this and kept at it.