Whispers at Moonrise (Shadow Falls #4)(62)

The subject on all three of his e-mails was the same: miss you.

A knot formed in her throat.

"Are you mad at me for something?" he asked.

"Yes." Her gaze moved back to the screen and it felt as if her heart started swelling-big, then bigger-until it felt as if it was outgrowing her chest. The ache was real and made it hard to breathe.

She swallowed. "No."

"Is it yes or no? Are you mad or not?" He sounded hurt. Or angry. Maybe both.

She closed her eyes and while she didn't hear him, she sensed he'd moved closer. His scent, a wonderfully earthy smell, seemed to take up residence in her cabin.

She inhaled. "Maybe."

"Hmm." He did indeed sound closer. Too close. Right behind her close. Touchable close.

As tempting as it was to turn around, she didn't. She stared at the screen and held her breath.

"Is this what they mean by a woman having the prerogative to change her mind?" A slight sound of humor rang in his voice.

"It could be," she muttered.

"Is this about me not showing up last night? I left a note. You were asleep."

"It's not about that." Her gaze stayed fixed on the computer screen. She spotted three e-mails from her dad. Another emotionally hard thing she needed to deal with. Knowing her mom was dating, knowing that her stepdad and mom probably would never get back together, would make seeing him even harder.

She blinked.

"Then what's it about?" His hand pressed down softly on her shoulder. Warm sensations flowed from his palm. "Because right now, I'd really like to kiss you and I don't know if that's possible. If you really are mad at me, I mean."

Inhaling, her heart raced at the thought of him kissing her. Of feeling his chest against hers.

"It's about you avoiding me," she said. "You're pulling away."

His other hand breezed across her shoulder. "Just until my father gives his approval for me to join the Council. I know it's hard, and yes, being together is going to be even harder with Clara here, but ... I need his approval. I don't think it will be much longer."

She blinked again, and that's when she saw it. Four ... no, five e-mails all with the word fog in the subject line. Could it be...?

"Oh, shit!" She saw another e-mail from the same address with a subject line that read talk.

"Oh, shit what?" he asked.

She opened her mouth to tell him, but shut it at the same time she shut off her e-mail. She hadn't told him her grandfather had been what chased his sister-hadn't told him because it didn't feel right. Telling him now felt even less right.

If she decided to meet her grandfather without Burnett, Lucas wouldn't approve. He'd be overprotective and insist on telling Burnett.

Kylie couldn't let Lucas tell Burnett, because Burnett would not want her to meet her grandfather without his being present. And it appeared as if her grandfather wasn't keen on meeting with Burnett.

She had to meet her grandfather-with or without Burnett. He had answers, and discovering those answers was her quest. How many times had Holiday told her that following your quest was about listening to your heart? And her heart said this was the right thing to do. Lucas would just have to understand.

And just like that, it hit her. Lucas's quest was to get on that Council. And to do that, he had to pretend in front of his pack and Clara that she wasn't that important to him. How could she be angry with him when ... she had her own agenda that was equally important to her?

Which meant she had to be more understanding. If his quest meant that they couldn't sit together at meals or he had to pretend they weren't boyfriend and girlfriend, she would accept that. Just like she expected him to accept that she had to follow her own quest.

She stood and turned around and faced him. "I'm sorry. I was overreacting." She placed her hands on his chest.

He stared at her, appearing even more puzzled. "You're not mad?"

She offered him a smile that came from deep within. The thought that her grandfather hadn't given up on seeing her filled her chest with a light bubbly feeling. She cut her gaze toward the computer and then met Lucas's gaze. "It hurt to feel that I came second after everyone else, but-"

"You don't come second. When I get on the Council, I'll have the power to put a stop to all this crap. The younger werewolves are clamoring to have someone on the Council to voice their opinion. I'll get their support and the elders won't be able to tell anyone who they should see or share their lives with. They won't hold anyone responsible for the sins of their parents. Please give me a little time."

"I will. And I'm sorry I was a bitch."

"I never said you were a bitch." He pulled her a bit closer. So close that the warmth of his body sent a wave of pleasure through her.

"I know," Kylie said. "And I get it now." She met his gaze and moistened her lips with her tongue. "Didn't you say something about kissing me?"

His brow wrinkled, but with a smile. "I don't think I'll ever understand girls."

"Then stop trying." She lifted up on her tiptoes. She wanted to kiss Lucas senseless, and then she wanted to send him on his way so she could find out what her grandfather said in his e-mails. But the moment Lucas's lips found hers, when his warm chest pressed against her breasts and his hands slipped up under her shirt to fit against the naked curve of her waist, she decided that the e-mails could wait a little longer.