What He Left Behind(57)



But holy shit, boring. Forget it.

I turn off the TV completely and start playing games on my phone instead. Just as I hoped, they hold my attention, and before I know it, Ariel’s head snaps up, making her tags jingle. A second later, the garage door rumbles to life, and Ariel is off the couch, bounding toward the door.

It’s just as well she has no dignity and does the running, jumping and barking. At this point, it’s either her or me.

Christ, what the f*ck is wrong with me? He’s been gone a few hours.

Having sex with another man.

Having sex with Michael.

Just like I’ve been doing for weeks.

Then Ian steps into the foyer. Ariel goes crazy—I know the feeling, sweetheart—so he crouches down to pet her and at least try not to get whipped in the face by that tail. Meanwhile, I sit up but don’t stand yet. Can’t look too eager, right?

Get a grip, idiot.

On the armchair, Rosie stretches and yawns, looking as indifferent as possible, then sits up and stares at Ian expectantly. When he’s done greeting the dog, he stands, and on his way to the couch, stops to pet her, and she bumps her head against his arm, purring loudly.

I shoot him my most pitiful expression. “So I’m third in line?”

“Hardly.” He rolls his eyes, sits beside me and puts an arm around my waist. “But I have to appease them so that when I say hello to you…” He draws me in for a kiss, and it’s one of those deep, languid kisses that turns my brain to mush. When our lips separate, he finishes: “…we don’t get interrupted.”

“G-good point.”

“So.” He winks. “Hello.”

We both laugh, and he kisses me again, briefly this time.

“So, um.” I clear my throat. “How was he? I mean, how was it? The night. With Michael.”

Ian chuckles and touches my cheek. “You’re adorable when you’re flustered, you know that?”

“Flustered. I’m—”

“Yes, you are.” He kisses the tip of my nose. “And to answer your question, everything went fine.”

“It went fine?” I fold my hands in my lap because I can’t remember how to look casual. “It wasn’t a surgical procedure, Ian.”

He laughs nervously. “What do you want me to say? I had a great time, and I’m pretty sure Michael did too. There isn’t much more to tell.”

“You enjoyed yourselves, though, right?”

Color blooms in his cheeks, and he can’t quite look me in the eye. “We had a good time.”

“Ian?” I tip up his chin. “You okay?”

“Yeah. Yeah.” He kisses my hand, and this time he does meet my gaze. “I guess it’s just a little weird coming home from another guy’s bed. Even his.”

“Tell me about it.”

He’s about to say something, but Rosie picks that moment to stomp across me and flop down in Ian’s lap.

I chuckle. “Somebody missed you tonight.”

He scratches her tummy. “How badly did she terrorize you?”

“She only bit me once.”

“She bit you?” He eyes me. “What did you do?”

“Told her she couldn’t sit on the kitchen counter.”

“What?” He wags his finger at her. “What have I told you, kitty?”

She swats at his finger but keeps her claws in. Of course.

He laughs, then picks her up and deposits her on the other cushion. When he faces me again, the humor is gone. “So, tonight.” He swallows. “There was one point where Michael started to freak out.”

My blood turns cold and my spine straightens. “What happened?”

He loses focus for a second. Slowly, he shakes his head and meets my gaze again. “I’m not even really sure, to be honest. Everything seemed fine, and then…”

“And then it wasn’t?”

“Basically.”

Sighing, I nod. “Yeah, I’ve had that happen many times. But, he was okay afterward?”

Ian nods. “We stopped for a little while. He calmed down, and then we got started again.”

“What set him off? I mean, what were you guys doing when it happened?”

Ian swallows. “Missionary. Or, trying to, anyway.”

“You on top? Or him?”

“Me.” He chews his lip. “When we tried again, he wanted to do the same position again, so we just took it slower.”

“He does like that position,” I say quietly. “We’ve done it quite a few times.”

“Why would it set him off this time?”

“It’s hard to say. That f*cking PTSD can just come out of nowhere.”

Ian’s lips twist. “Now I get why you called it a minefield.”

“Uh-huh. He’s come a long way, though. It’s amazing to see the difference in him. How he was so nervous and self-conscious early on, but now…”

Ian shivers.

So do I.

“It’s a damned shame he was ever like that,” Ian says. “I swear, if I ever see Steve again…”

“You and me both. And I’m going to be chewing my nails to stumps the first time Michael’s out with another guy.”

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