Waiting On You (Blue Heron #3)(102)

“So your ex is coming to visit. Thanks for the warning.”

“Colleen, slow down. It’s not a big deal.”

“Really? It is to me. And hey, she’s pregnant. Wow.”

He pulled her to a stop. “Mía, don’t—”

She made a hissing noise. “Now is not the time for mía, Lucas.”

“Why? What’s wrong?”

She stopped in front of the Civil War monument and sighed the universally recognized men are idiots sigh of the female. “Lucas. First of all, the woman you threw me over for is here.”

“I didn’t—”

“And second of all, she’s engaged. And pregnant.”

“Right. Why is that a problem?”

Another disgusted look. “So you only...wanted...”

Well, shit. She was crying.

“Colleen,” he breathed. “Sweetheart.”

“Oh, shut up! Don’t sweet-talk me! How dare you sweet-talk me! So she moved on, she found someone else, she’s having a baby—and even then, did you ever think about me? No! Not until I was directly in your line of vision.”

“That’s so far from the truth, it’s almost funny.”

“Really? How long have you been divorced?”

“Officially?”

“Yes! Officially!”

“Two years.” He paused. “And three months.”

“So why didn’t you call me two years and three months ago? Or two years ago? Or a year ago? Or six months ago? Why is it only now, when Joe needed you and Ellen is breeding twins with some other guy, that you even bothered to think of me again?”

Women. He could really use a decoder ring where they were concerned. “It wasn’t because I didn’t think of you. It was because I didn’t feel like I had any—”

“Don’t bullshit a bullshitter, Lucas. You know how many times I’ve seen men sling those smarmy lines? A trillion and six, okay?”

“Colleen, don’t make this into something it’s not. Look. We’re together now, you and I. Aren’t we?”

“I’m not the one with the pregnant woman in my apartment, Lucas!”

An older couple was walking their dog and gave him a sharp look. “Everything okay there, Collie?” the man asked.

“Not really, Bob, but thank you!” she called. “Hi, Sue. Hi, Muffin.”

Lucas waited until the couple was inside. “Yes, Ellen is in my apartment. Should I ask her to sleep in the alley?”

“You—I—it’s—you know what? Bite me. Go to your ex-wife who’s perfect in every way and not messy or emotional or just a stupid bartender.”

“You’re not a stupid bartender. Colleen. Settle down.”

“You know why I think you’re with me, Lucas? Because I’m here. You’re here for your uncle, you’re sad, and hey, what’s this, it’s that girl you used to be with, and lookee here! She’s still single! And easy, apparently, because it only took you what? Three weeks to get into my pants?”

“Four plus.”

“Four plus. Wow. I’m a regular chastity belt. All I am is convenient, Lucas. Your wife divorced you and found someone else, and only now are you interested in me. And you’re not even here for me. And I knew that. I’m an idiot.”

“Colleen, this is ridiculous.” Poor choice of words, perhaps, because she answered with her middle finger, then turned and stomped away.

“You’re not convenient,” he called at her retreating back. “You’re extremely inconvenient, Colleen!” Nothing. “I’ll call you tomorrow when you’ve had time to calm down.”

And again, not the smartest thing to say. This time her gesture was more creative.

With a sigh, Lucas scrubbed a hand through his hair. This had been a pretty fantastic night until fifteen minutes ago.

Well. Ellen was indeed back at his apartment, and she was an attorney, and his dying uncle needed an attorney, and Colleen could just...just...

She couldn’t really believe she was convenient.

He ran the two blocks to her apartment. There was a light in her window, though the first floor was dark. Hopefully, her brother wasn’t about to come out and beat him up.

“Colleen!” he yelled up at her window.

No answer, though the giant dog’s head appeared in the window.

“Colleen!”

“Quiet, or I’ll call the police!” she barked. “This is a nice neighborhood.” She yanked up the screen and stuck her head out, then glanced next door. “Sorry, Mr. Wong. My idiot boyfriend. Do you have a gun? Just to scare him or maim him slightly.”

“Sorry, Colleen,” the neighbor called. “I’m antigun.”

“That’s a pity. Sorry for the noise.” She turned back to Lucas. “What?”

“Don’t be mad at me, you inconvenient woman.”

“I am mad. Leave me alone.”

“Can I call you?”

“No. I’m about to start power-eating Ben & Jerry’s. Leave me alone.”

“What kind?”

The question brought a smile to her lips, which she quickly smothered. “Peanut Butter Cup.”