Virgin River (Virgin River #1)(101)

She settled back to earth slowly. “I thought you were going to call,” she said.

“Isn’t this better?”

“You always know what to do,” she said.

“Not always,” he said, holding her close. “Right now, for example. I’m not sure what to do.”

“Why?” she asked, her eyes still closed, her face buried in his chest.

“When are you going to tell me?”

She lifted her head. “Tell you?”

“About the baby.”

“But Jack, you know the baby and mother are—”

“The baby inside of you,” he said, placing a large hand over her flat tummy. A startled look crossed her features. She pushed him away a little bit. “Did someone say something to you?” she asked.

“No one had to say anything. Please tell me I’m not the last to know.”

“I just saw John yesterday—and how in the world would you know?”

“Mel,” he said, running the back of one knuckle along her cheek. “Your body’s changing. You haven’t had a period. For a while, I thought maybe you’d had a hysterectomy or something because I haven’t noticed a period since the first time we made love, but there’s a blue box under the bathroom sink. You don’t drink your beer, and you get nauseous from time to time. Not to mention being more tired than usual.”

“Lord,” she said. “You never think a man will notice. Not things like that.”

“Well?”

She sighed. “I went to see John yesterday to confirm what I already suspected. I’m pregnant. Three months.”

“You’re a midwife. How could you not know at three weeks?”

“Because I assumed I was sterile. Infertile. Mark and I did everything to try to get a baby—even in vitro fertilization. To no avail. This was the last thing I ever expected.”

“Ah,” he said, finally clear on why she might keep it from him. “So, here we are,” he said.

“I’m sorry, Jack. You must think I’m an idiot.”

He kissed her. “Of course not. Mel, I’m in love with you.”

She was frozen for a second. “Oh, God,” she finally said, plummeted into tears. “Oh, God, Jack!” She buried her face in his chest and wept.

“Hey, no reason to cry, baby. You a little surprised? No more than me,” he laughed. “I never thought this could happen to me. It hit me so hard, I damn near fell down. But I love you.” She continued to softly cry. “It’s okay, honey. It’ll be okay.” He stroked her hair. “You want to have a baby, obviously.”

She lifted her head. “I wanted a baby so badly, I ached. But do you?” she asked. “I mean, you’re forty.”

“I want everything with you. Everything. Besides, I like babies. And I’m wild about pregnant women.”

“When did you decide you knew for sure?” she asked him.

“At least a month ago.” He put a hand over her breast. “Sore? Haven’t you noticed the changes? Your ni**les have darkened.”

“I was in denial,” she said, wiping at her tears. “I was so desperate for a baby—but I had accepted that it couldn’t happen. I wouldn’t have done it this way.”

“And how would you have done it, exactly?”

“If I thought it even remotely possible I could get pregnant, I would have at least been sure you wanted a family, so that we could make a decision like this together. Fully informed. So if it happened, it would be okay. I hate that you’ve had this thrust on you. With no warning.”

“That wasn’t going to happen, not under the circumstances. It never would have occurred to you to try for a baby—convinced it was impossible. So—maybe it’s a good thing it just happened like this.”

“And what if it had gone the other way? What if I told you the thing I wanted most in the world was a baby, asked you to try for one with me?”

He pulled her a little closer. “I’d have been happy to help out.” Then he smiled into her eyes.

“I don’t know what to say. You just accept everything. You’re amazing. I thought you might be very pissed.”

“Nah. The only thing that disappoints me is that it took me this long to find you.”

“Even with all my baggage?” she asked.

“I don’t consider this baggage.” He leaned over and kissed her belly. “I consider this the grand prize.”

“You want it?” she asked.

“I told you,” he said. “I want it. It makes me happy.”

“God,” she said in a breath. “I was afraid.”

“Of?”

“Of you saying, ‘Holy shit—I’m forty! What do I want with a baby?’”

He laughed at her. “I didn’t say that, did I? Nah, I’m ready. A family sounds good.”

“Jack,” she said. “I’m still afraid.”

“Of?”

“Of believing in us. My last stab at something like this ended so, so badly. I thought I’d never get over it. I’m not sure I am yet.”

“Well, you’re just going to have to take a leap of faith,” he said.