Until We Touch (Fool's Gold #15)(58)

A few weeks ago she would have teased him about turning into a woman, saying something like that. He would have teased her back. Things had been easy. Before, she thought sadly. Before she’d realized she’d fallen in love with him.

Ignorance really was bliss, she admitted to herself as she stepped back to allow him in. Right now she was battling an uncomfortable combination of hurt, humiliation and, the real kicker—happiness to bask in his presence. How ridiculous was that?

Jack stepped into her small apartment. He bent down and scooped Dyna up in his arms. The long-haired feline relaxed completely and continued to purr.

“Hey, gorgeous,” he said as he rubbed the side of her face. Dyna snuggled closer.

Larissa had to admit that the sight of a big tough guy holding a fluffy cat was pretty hard to resist. Not that she was interested in resisting all that much. Which was part of the problem. Her lack of willpower.

Jack set Dyna on the sofa and then drew in a breath. “I’m sorry about the masseuse,” he said. “That was wrong on a lot of different levels. I shouldn’t have called her at all, but having called, I should have gone to see her somewhere else. I violated your personal space. I apologize for that.”

She nodded, knowing he wasn’t responsible for all the blame.

“I changed the rules,” she admitted, not quite meeting his gaze.

“You did and you scared the hell out of me.”

That made her look at him. “How do you figure?”

“Larissa, you’re important to me. You and I are close and I like that. I like everything about our relationship. I trust you and there aren’t a whole lot of people I can say that about. What we have...” He paused. “I saw Percy in town today.”

“Okay, and that’s relevant how?”

“He was with a girl. Her name is Melissa and they’re seeing each other.”

“Percy has a girlfriend? Why didn’t I know about this? Who is she and do I approve?”

Jack smiled gently. “Not my point. When I freaked out, he told me not to worry. That he wasn’t, ah, sleeping with her. She was too important for that. Now, I used to be an eighteen-year-old guy so I know exactly how much sex matters. What I think he meant is hooking up is easy. Relationships are a whole other thing. That’s what I mean about you. I don’t want to date you because my romantic relationships always end badly. If we don’t go down that path, we can stay together forever.”

Maybe, but the way things were, she was stuck being in love with him. “What if I want more?”

“I can’t give you that.”

“You mean you don’t want to.”

“Isn’t it the same thing?” he asked.

“Not really. I just wish you were interested in me in that way.” She wanted to ask if he could try a little harder, but that seemed too much like begging. And a girl either had to have Dyna’s looks or a little pride.

He closed the space between them and took her hands in his. “We’re a great team. Look at all we get done. Your causes, my causes. We laugh a lot. Isn’t that better than being in love with me?”

She pulled her hands free. “I don’t like this any more than you do. It’s humiliating to think you don’t want me or think of me as other than a friend. Why can’t you be begging me for something I don’t want to give?”

“I’ll beg for things to go back the way they were before, if that helps.”

She crossed her arms over her chest. “I just want to be a part of something. I want...” She paused as yet another uncomfortable truth rose to the surface. “I want what my sisters have. A conventional, normal marriage with a couple of kids and a great husband.”

A muscle twitched in Jack’s jaw, but what he said was, “I want that for you, too.”

“With another guy?”

“Unless you’re playing for the other team these days. If so, I know a really cute girl who might be your type.”

“Ha ha.” She sighed. “I’m so boring.”

“You’re not. You’re lovely.”

“I’m nearly thirty, single and desperately in love with a man who has no interest in me. The only thing that would make me more of a cliché was if you were married. Honestly, how did this happen?”

He shrugged. “You couldn’t help yourself, Larissa. You never had a chance. I mean, come on. It’s me.”

Which was both funny and completely the truth, she thought as she smiled at him. “You’re not all that.”

“I would agree with you, except for this situation between us. It kind of proves my point.”

“You’re so annoying.”

He held out his arms.

She hesitated for a second, then stepped into his embrace. It wasn’t like the one from a few nights ago. There was no erection, no kissing. Just the familiar feel of Jack’s arms around her.

“Friends?” he asked.

She nodded. “I wonder if Kenny would like to go out with me.”

“Aren’t you the funny one? Want to go get dinner?”

“Sure. I’m going to order the most expensive item on the menu.”

“That’s my girl.”

* * *

ORDER WAS RESTORED to the Score family, at least on the surface. Larissa was grateful to have something close to normal in her relationship with Jack. They hung out together, she gave him massages—without him getting aroused—and together she and Percy teased him mercilessly about his somewhat pathetic attempt to have the birds-and-bees talk with a streetwise teen.