Torn (Billionaire Bachelors Club #2)(48)
I’m too mad. Angry sex with Gage is amazing—we’ve indulged a few times because we’re sort of sick and twisted like that—but not like this. Not with this sort of horrible betrayal.
He’s taken it too far.
“I saw what you keep on your computer.” He waves his hand toward the monitor. “I had no idea we made a p**n video, Marina. Wish you would’ve told me. Do you plan on selling it now that you know what a jerk I really am? Distributing it online so it can make the rounds? Maybe earn a few million hits on YouTube?”
Gasping, I round the desk, staring at the screen where the video is paused. There we are in black and white. I can see my naked legs wrapped around him, his body hovering over mine, my arms around his neck. I minimize the screen, glancing up to find him studying me, his expression downright deadly.
“Why do you have that on your computer?” he asks, his voice scary quiet. “It makes no sense for you to keep it this long. Unless you did it on purpose so you could use it against me.”
I’m in complete shock. Does he really think that low of me? What sort of women did he date in his past? “I . . . the morning after the encounter in the kitchen, kids smashed the pumpkins we had around the front door.” I’m going to tell him the entire story, even if it kills me. “So I checked the videos from the night before and saw the kids but couldn’t identify them.”
“Okay,” he says slowly, probably wondering why I’m telling him all this.
But there is a point to my story. “Then I clicked through, checking out all the cameras we have and I saw this. Us.” Closing my eyes, I breathe deep, searching for strength. I can’t believe I’m the one who has to explain myself when he’s the one who kept the worst secret ever. I open my eyes and continue. “I—liked watching it. I was so confused after what happened between us. How could I hate someone and want him, all at the same time? You drove me crazy. Keeping this video was my way of . . . holding on to something that has sentimental value, you know?”
“A video of us f**king in your kitchen has sentimental value?” He laughs and shakes his head. “That’s just great.”
“I refuse to let you make me feel guilty. I had it up on my computer because I was going to delete it.” I don’t know why I held onto it so long. Earlier I’d brought it back up, ready to delete when my mom called. I pushed away from my computer, talked to her a bit, felt the headache come on, and then left, forgetting all about it. “I realized it probably wasn’t smart, having a video of us. What if it fell into the wrong hands?”
“No shit. Not one of your most brilliant moves, Marina.” He snorts, shaking his head.
Ah, there’s the old Gage. The one I want to slap across the face for saying such shitty, hurtful things. I stand, slapping my hands against the edge of the desk. “Don’t try and make this all about what I’ve done to you. It’s minor compared to what you’ve done and you know it. You’re the one who bought out my dad and Molina Corp. Why didn’t you tell me? How long were you going to wait? I deserved to know, Gage.”
He glares at me, his green eyes cold. Hard. “You really think I would purposely keep this from you so I could hurt you, Marina? After everything we’ve gone through, everything we’ve experienced this last month? You don’t know me at all, do you?”
I shrug, trying to blow it off. I have no idea what’s real and what’s not anymore. I don’t care how gutted he sounds. As hard as it is for me to realize, I don’t think I can trust him. “I don’t know. It’s only been a month. What could I expect from you?”
It’s Gage’s turn to rush me, coming round the desk so he’s standing in front of me, his hands clasping my upper arms, shaking me as if he can knock some sense into me. “I’m in love with you, damn it. I wanted to show you how I felt by giving you the goddamn deed to this place. I was going to give it to you as a surprise and Ivy was going to redecorate the café. I was putting together an advertising plan and everything. Anything you wanted for this place, I would’ve given you.”
I gape at him, shock rendering me completely still. He was going to give me the deed? As a gift? And have his sister redecorate the café? I can’t . . . oh my God. I’m such a jerk. “Why didn’t you tell me though? You should’ve. My mom took great pleasure in being the first one to deliver the news.”
I’m still so angry at him. I don’t know if I’ll ever feel the same way about him again. His words alone nearly destroyed me.
Now that I know he planned all of this? I don’t know what to think. What to do.
How to react.
“Yeah, I know. I f**ked up. Archer said I should tell you. So did Ivy. But I wanted it to be a surprise. It was a risky move, and look. I really ruined it now.” He laughs, sounding borderline hysterical, and I want to go to him. Comfort him. Tell him everything’s going to be okay.
But I can’t. It still feels like a betrayal, just like me keeping the video of our first sexual encounter feels like a betrayal to him.
Now he talks about his plans in the past tense. Like I ruined my chances to be with him. Work with him.
Love him.
“You’re mad at me, aren’t you.” It’s not a question. He sounds so defeated, my heart is breaking for him. For me. My anger is slowly evaporating, turning more on my mother, which I know is pointless. She’s my mom. I won’t be angry with her forever.