This Heart of Mine (Chicago Stars #5)(120)

"Training camp?" He slipped his sunglasses into his shirt pocket.

"Veterans are supposed to report this morning."

"Damn. I guess I'm in trouble then."

"Did Phoebe send you here?"

"Not exactly."

"Then what's going on?"

"I wanted to talk to you, that's all. Tell you some things."

"You're supposed to be at training camp."

"I think you already mentioned that."

"One phone call and I can find out why you're not there."

He hadn't wanted to do this yet, and his hands found their way into his pockets. "First, maybe you'd better hear what I have to say."

"Give me your cell phone."

"It's in the car."

She grabbed a sweatshirt he seemed to remember belonged to him and marched toward the fence at the bottom of the meadow. "I'll call from the house."

"I'm AWOL, okay? I'm being traded!"

She spun around. "Traded? They can't do that."

"They're crazy, and they can do just about anything they want."

"Not without throwing away the season." She twisted the arms of his sweatshirt into a knot at her waist and charged toward him. "Tell me exactly what happened. Every word."

"I don't want to." His throat felt tight and his tongue clumsy. "I want to tell you how pretty you are."

She regarded him suspiciously. "I look just like I did the last time you saw me, except my nose is sunburned."

"You're beautiful." He moved closer. "And I want to marry you. For real. Forever."

She blinked. "Why?"

This wasn't going the way he'd planned it. He wanted to touch her, but the frown marks between her eyebrows made him think twice. "Because I love you. I really do. More than I ever could have imagined."

Perfect silence.

"Molly, listen to me. I'm sorry about what happened, sorry it's taken me so long to figure out what I want, but when I was with you, I was having too good a time to think. After you left, though, things weren't so good, and I realized that everything you said about me is right. I was afraid. I let football become my whole life. It was the only thing I was sure of, and that's why I got so reckless this year. There was something missing inside me I was trying to fill up, but I went about doing it the wrong way. But there sure isn't anything missing inside me now, because you're there."

Molly's heart was pounding so loudly she was afraid he could hear. Did he mean it? He looked as if he meant it—worried, upset, more serious than she'd ever seen him. What if he really meant it?

As a child who'd been emotionally abused, she had a strong survivor's instinct, and it kicked in. "Tell me about the trade."

"Let's not talk about that now. Let's talk about us. About our future."

"I can't talk about the future until I understand the here and now."

He must have known she wasn't going to let it go, but he still tried to sidestep. "I've missed you so much. Without you, I stopped being happy."

It was everything she'd wanted to hear. And yet… "All I have to do is call her."

He wandered toward the fence. "All right, we'll do it your way." He braced a hand on the top rail. "I wanted to try to set things right with them once and for all, so I went out to the house. Dan wasn't around, but I saw Phoebe. I told her I loved you and that I was going to ask you to marry me for real. I said I wanted her blessing."

Molly needed something to hold on to, but there wasn't anything around, so she sank down in the weeds, drew her knees to her chest, and concentrated on sucking in air.

He gazed down at her. "You could look a little happier."

"Tell me the rest."

"Phoebe didn't like it." He pushed himself away from the fence, the lines around his mouth deepening. "As a matter of fact, she hated it. She accused me of using you as an insurance policy toward my retirement."

"I don't understand."

"Everybody knows I want to coach eventually, and I've talked to Dan about his front-office work."

Molly finally got it. "She said you were using me to guarantee your future with the Stars. Is that it?"

He erupted. "I don't need a guarantee! I proved myself a long time ago! There's not a player in the league who knows more about the game than I do, but she looked at me like I was a no-name parasite. Molly, I understand that you love your sister, but football's a game about winning, and I have to tell you right now that I've lost all respect for her."

Her legs had regained enough strength for her to stand. "There's more, isn't there?"

His expression was a mixture of anger and confusion, as if he couldn't comprehend how a life made of gold could have developed any tarnish. "She said I could have you or the Stars, but not both. She said if I saw you again, my career with the team was over. If I stayed away, I still had my job."

Something warm opened up in Molly's heart. "And you believed her?"

"You're damn right I believed her! And it's her loss! I don't need the Stars. I don't even want to play for them anymore."