The Windup Girl(37)

Still, the ghosts are all around. Everyone agrees on that. The victims of AgriGen and PurCal and all their ilk.

Jaidee says, "I wouldn't take it personally, about your grandmother. On the full moon, I've seen the phii crowding the roads around the Environment Ministry, too. Many dozens of them." He smiles sadly. "It's really impossible to fix, I think. When I think about Niwat and Surat growing up with this…" He takes a breath, fighting back more emotion than he cares to show before Kanya. Takes another drink. "Anyway, the fight is good. I just wish we could get hold of some AgriGen or PurCal executives and throttle them. Maybe give them a taste of blister rust AG134.s. Then my life would be complete. I could die happy."

"You probably won't reincarnate, either," Kanya observes. "You're too good to end up in this hell again."

"If I'm lucky I'll be reborn in Des Moines, and bomb their generip labs."

"If only."

Jaidee looks up at Kanya's tone. "What's bothering you? Why so sad? We'll both be reborn somewhere beautiful, I'm sure. Both of us. Think of all the merit we earned just last night. I thought those Customs heeya were going to shit themselves when we burned the cargo."

Kanya makes a bitter face. "They've probably never met a white shirt they couldn't bribe."

And as quick as that, she kills his attempt at good humor. No wonder no one likes her at the Ministry. "No. That's true. Everyone takes bribes, now. It's not like before. People don't remember the worst times. They aren't afraid the way they were before."

"And now you dive down the cobra's throat with Trade." Kanya says, "After the December 12coup, it seems as if General Pracha and Minister Akkarat are always circling one another, looking for a new excuse to fight. They never finished their feud, and now you do something to further anger Akkarat. It makes things unstable."

"Well, I was always too jai rawn for my own good. Chaya complains about it, too. That's why I keep you around. I wouldn't worry about Akkarat, though. He'll spit for a while, then he'll calm down. He may not like it, but General Pracha has too many allies in the Army for another coup attempt. With Prime Minister Surawong dead, Akkarat really has nothing left. He's isolated. Without megodonts and tanks to back up his threats, Akkarat may be rich, but he is a paper tiger. This is a good lesson for him."

"He's dangerous."

Jaidee looks at her seriously. "So are cobras. So are megodonts. So is cibiscosis. We're surrounded by dangers. Akkarat…" Jaidee shrugs. "Anyway, it's already done. There's nothing you can do to change it. Why worry now? Mai pen rai. Never mind."

"Still, you should be careful."

"You're thinking of that man at the anchor pads? The one Somchai saw? Did he frighten you?"

Kanya shrugs. "No."

"I'm surprised. He frightened me." Jaidee watches Kanya, wondering how much he should say, how much he should reveal that he knows about the world around him. "I have a very bad feeling about him."

"Really?" Kanya looks distressed. "You're frightened? Of one stupid man?"

Jaidee shakes his head. "Not afraid so that I will run and hide behind Chaya's pha sin, but still, I've seen him before."

"You didn't tell me."

"I wasn't sure at first. Now I am. I think he is with Trade." He pauses, testing. "I think they are hunting me again. Maybe considering another assassination. What do you think of that?"

"They wouldn't dare touch you. Her Majesty the Queen has spoken in your favor."

Jaidee touches his neck where the old spring gun scar still shows light on his dark skin. "Not even after what I did to them at the anchor pads?"

Kanya bridles. "I'll assign a bodyguard."

Jaidee laughs at her fierceness and is warmed and reassured by it. "You're a good girl, but I'd be a fool to take a bodyguard. Then everyone would know that I can be frightened. That's not the way of a tiger. Here, eat this." He scoops more snake head plaa onto Kanya's plate.

"I'm full."

"Don't be so polite. Eat."

"You should have a bodyguard. Please."

"I'll trust you to guard my back. You should be more than enough."

Kanya flinches. Jaidee hides a smile at her discomfort. Ahh, Kanya, he thinks. We all have choices we must face in life. I've made mine. But you have your own kamma. He speaks gently. "Go on and eat more, you look skinny. How will you find a special friend if you're only bones?"

Kanya pushes her plate away. "I don't eat much these days, it seems."

"People are starving everywhere, and you can't eat."

Kanya makes a face and scoops a sliver of fish onto her spoon.

Jaidee shakes his head. He sets down his own fork and spoon. "What is it? You're even more glum than usual. I feel like we've just put one of our brothers in a funeral urn. What's bothering you?"

"It's nothing. Really. Just not hungry."

"Speak up, Lieutenant. I want straight talk from you. It's an order. You're a good officer. I can't stand having your sad face. I don't like any of my people to be sad-faced, even the ones from Isaan."