The Way You Look Tonight (The Sullivans #9)(63)

As a child, Brooke had looked at Rafe Sullivan with stars in her eyes. Eighteen years later, when he’d touched her as a woman, those stars had transformed into something so bright, so beautiful, that she’d been blind to anything else. All she’d wanted for him was to see him smile more easily, more often. And for herself, a little taste of being wild and safe and warm in his strong arms.

She’d loved him so much that she’d believed she had enough faith in the world for both of them, enough to help renew his faith in people, to show him that love could change everything.

But could it?

Chapter Twenty-three

It had been barely fifteen minutes since Brooke had driven away, and Rafe missed her so badly already that he’d almost fired up his motorcycle a dozen times to race after her. But she’d given him twenty-four hours when he’d asked for it. He owed her the same now, owed her one more chance to think things through.

He had left Seattle for the summer to get away from the ass**les for a little while so that he could clear his head…only to find out that he was the real ass**le. And now, if he couldn’t convince her to take him back, he’d have to come to the lake every summer, wave at her from his porch next door, and watch her fall in love with some other guy who was smart enough to know a good thing when he held it in his arms. It would kill Rafe to see Brooke grow pregnant with another man’s children, and to have someone else teach them to swim and tell them scary stories around the bonfire at night, all the while knowing that that guy should have been him.

But he’d been so stuck on focusing on everything bad in the world that he hadn’t let himself see that the very best thing had been in his arms the whole time. He was supposed to be a great investigator, but he’d ignored every loving, honest cue Brooke had given him.

Although Rafe now had a newly renovated and furnished home, a home that had once been filled with the love and laughter of his family, he finally understood where his real home was. With Brooke.

A week ago, next door hadn’t seemed like far enough away in case things went wrong with their fling. But now it was too far away. He couldn’t stay here, couldn’t imagine spending even one night in his new bed without her curled up against him.

God, he was such an idiot. He’d been so worried about hurting Brooke, about stripping away her innocence with kinky sex. But nothing they’d done in the bedroom had taken away the sweet light in her eyes. No, sending Ben out to dig into her past had been what had finally torn the veil away.

Her parents had never let themselves see the real Brooke, and he’d told her he had. But he’d been so scared about what he’d seen whenever he looked into her eyes that he’d tried to look through the cynical investigator’s eyes instead of those of a man who had fallen in love fast and hard. He’d come up with the perfect way to test that forever...and to make sure she knew exactly how far he was from being a man she could count on to share her sunny, sweet life.

And all the while he’d believed that it was better to throw something away than to have it stolen from him later.

Rafe hadn’t cheated on Brooke, but it was just as bad that he hadn’t talked to her, or had enough respect for her strength to tell her how scared he was about loving her, and about whether he could be the man she needed him to be. He’d been so proud of himself for never cheating on a woman, when all the while it turned out that he was worse than any of the scum he’d caught cheating over the years.

How was he going to fix things?

These were the most important twenty-four hours of his life, and he felt lost. Completely, utterly lost. He’d finally put a stop to the investigations that had darkened his heart, but was it too little, too late?

Other people came to Rafe Sullivan for help. He didn’t go to them. But, suddenly, he realized he’d been a fool for more than one reason, with more than just Brooke. His family had always been there for him, but he’d shut them out. Not just after he’d been slashed with the knife, but long before that, when his job—and life—had become something he didn’t much like anymore.

He pulled the phone out of his pocket and dialed. "Mia, I need your help."

"Rafe? What happened?" Of course, before he could answer, his sister had already guessed it had something to do with Brooke. "What did you do?"

"I screwed everything up, just like you predicted."

"How?"

"I ran a background check on Brooke’s business partner without checking with her first."

She made a considering sound. "Well, that shows a major lack of respect, but honestly, even though I’m sure she’s mad about it, I don’t think it’s anything you can’t come back from if you grovel enough."

"That’s not all, Mia." He swallowed hard at the full extent of his stupidity. "I did a background on Brooke, too."

"Oh, shit, Rafe." She was silent for a long moment. "You’re my brother, and I love you, but you sure aren’t making it easy on a sister to help. Because if a man I was sleeping with did that to me—"

"We aren’t just sleeping together. I love her. And I only have twenty-four hours to figure out a way to get her back."

He didn’t know what he expected Mia to say to him upon hearing that he’d fallen in love with her childhood friend. He only knew it wasn’t, "You would never have done something like that if you didn’t love her." Of course Mia followed it up with something he did expect. "I swear, men are so stupid sometimes I can’t believe there’s any of you left." She let out a long, deep sigh. "If you had just forgotten her birthday or something like that, I could give you an easy fix. You know, a dozen roses or standing outside her window while you recite the poetry you wrote about how beautiful she is. But after what you’ve done, I’m going to need some time to think of a much better way for you to unlock her heart again so that she can trust you."