The Vincent Boys (The Vincent Boys #1)(37)

I laid my head back on the seat and closed my eyes. There were so many reasons why I could never have Beau. And every time I voiced one it ripped another hole in my heart.

“You’re right,” he said in a hoarse whisper.

Hearing him agree felt as if he’d just run a sword through my chest. I bit back a sob and turned my head away from him.

Neither of us spoke again.

When he pulled into the parking spot beside my car, Sawyer was at the passenger side of Beau’s truck, immediately opening it and reaching for me.

“I’m sorry, baby. I’ve been so wrapped up in football that I’ve been ignoring you. You just lost your Grana and now your relatives have invaded your house.” He pulled me into his arms and I let him hold me. Right now my chest ached so badly I needed someone to hold me together. Even if that someone wasn’t Beau.

“Thank you, Beau. You were there for her when I wasn’t. I owe you one,” Sawyer said over my head. I didn’t look at Beau. I kept my face buried in Sawyer’s chest.

“You’re welcome,” he replied. Sawyer closed the truck door and I listened as the tires crunched over the gravel. The sound of Beau driving off and leaving me here with Sawyer.

“Come back to my house with me. I’m grilling outside with Dad tonight and my parents would love to have you over,” Sawyer said, pulling back to gaze down at me. I couldn’t say no. I didn’t want to say no. Going home meant more Lana and more Aunt Caroline.

“Okay.”

Chapter 14

Beau

“Hey, Beau.”

I turned around to see Kayla walking up beside me with a clipboard in her hands. The halls were packed with everyone stopping by their locker in between classes. This would be the time Kayla hunted me down to ask me a question. It was impossible to get away from her in this crowd. She gave me a flirty smile and licked her lips. Kayla was only brave enough to speak to me when Nicole was nowhere around.

“Kayla,” I replied and kept walking, forcing her to jog a little in order to keep up with me. Normally clipboards and Kayla meant the head cheerleader was going to try to rope you into something.

“You haven’t picked your spirit girl yet.”

That comment didn’t even rank a reply. I never picked my spirit girl. Someone always ended up doing it. Actually, I normally had several volunteers eager and willing at my locker on game day begging to meet all my needs.

“I can put your name in the hat for one of the girls to draw your name or you can pick. The rest of the first string have picked already. So several of the girls already have their two guys. If you want one of the top picks you need to claim her now.”

Again no reason to respond.

“Okay, well here are the best or most popular picks who still have one opening left: Heather Kerr, Blair, Heidi, Noel, Heather Long, and Amy.”

Ashton stood beside her locker trying not to appear as if she was listening. I could see her watching me from the corner of her eyes. That caught my attention. The ache which had taken up residence in my chest these days squeezed, reminding me why it was there. Would this feeling ever go away? How long would seeing her hurt so bad?

“Oh, and Ashton of course.” Kayla’s chipper tone finally said the one word I couldn’t drown out.

“What about Ashton?” I asked, tearing my gaze away from her to stare down at Kayla.

“She’s still available. No one has picked her except Sawyer of course. I don’t think anyone will. No one wants her because they know they won’t be getting any special treatment from her. All the special treatment she’ll be dishing out will be for Sawyer.”

“I want her.”

“You do? Really?”

“Yes.”

“But you know Noel has a thing for you and I can promise she’ll meet all your needs,” Kayla started saying.

“I want Ashton,” I repeated and glared down at her before turning and heading outside to the field house.

Asking for Ashton might be opening myself up for more pain but the thought of her doing things for Sawyer was enough to drive me crazy. The thought of her having to make cookies for yet another guy and decorating his locker and making him cards infuriated me. Besides, I wasn’t doing so great in Chemistry. I needed some tutoring. The one on one kind where boyfriends weren’t allowed.

“That was one helluva catch,” Sawyer said as we picked up our helmets we’d thrown on the sidelines before we ran suicides. I didn’t look at him as I turned and headed toward the fifty-yard line to grab the gloves I’d taken off earlier.

“I was a little more focused today,” I replied, jogging out to grab my gloves. Sawyer followed me. I needed some distance from him. Today he’d pushed me a little too far with his affection toward Ashton. He of course didn’t know that.

“I’d started to get worried about you. The last few practices you have seemed off. But today you seemed to find your sweet spot.”

A week ago his comment would have made me feel guilty. But after having to endure him kissing and touching Ashton daily, my guilty conscience was being replaced by rage. Why the hell should he get to have it all? Our entire lives he’d had it all but I’d never cared. Never wanted or asked him for anything. Now he had the one thing I wanted more than air and he didn’t even know her. The girl he loved didn’t exist.