The Recruit (Highland Guard #6)(61)

She froze. “Nothing.”

His eyes held hers. “I don’t believe you.”

He leaned closer, and Mary felt a burst of panic. “We were—are—finished, whether you choose to accept it or not. Believe it or not, you are not the only man in the kingdom, my lord.”

His eyes flared. She didn’t know what provoked her to challenge him, but she couldn’t seem to help herself.

“You can’t be talking about Felton?”

Something about his attitude infuriated her. Did he think the handsome knight could not be interested in her?

She arched a brow. “Just because I did not wish to marry you does not mean I could not be persuaded to marry someone else. Why not the most handsome man at Berwick?”

She was doing it again. Challenging a man who couldn’t resist a challenge. Who was volatile. Raring for a fight. It was like throwing confections to a bairn and daring him not to eat them.

He leaned closer, and for a moment she feared he would kiss her. The pounding in her chest was because she didn’t want him to. She didn’t want to feel the heat of those warm, soft lips on hers.

His gaze pinned her. “I think you’d better reconsider.”

Her breath was so tight she barely managed, “Why?”

He smiled. “Because I don’t think Felton would like having his wife in my bed, and that’s where you are going to be.”

Mary gasped. But he didn’t let her reply. He opened the door and left her standing alone in the room, gaping.

Fourteen

“When will you go?” Sir Adam asked.

Mary hadn’t missed the slight frown between his dark brows. It had taken most of the day, but she had finally managed to pull Sir Adam aside for a few minutes to speak with him privately. Knowing how much she enjoyed watching Davey, he suggested they sit near a window in the Great Hall that overlooked the practice yard.

The warriors weren’t yet in position, but Mary’s eyes kept straying outside. How she would miss this! Her chest pinched again at the unfairness. But it could not be avoided. Her last conversation with Sir Kenneth was proof enough. And if there was one thing Mary had learned, it was that when she sensed danger, she should run and not wait around for someone else to help her.

In his bed? Her stomach dropped. Dear God.

“As soon as transportation can be arranged,” she answered. “Tomorrow, if possible.”

The frown on those familiar craggy features deepened. His face was so known to her, she did not often take the time to look at him. He must be three and forty now, she realized. Still a handsome man. If only she could think of him that way. Her mind went to another man who she did think of that way, but dearly wished she didn’t.

Irony. Not funny at all sometimes.

“Does Davey know?”

She nodded. “I told him before the midday meal.”

“When will you return?”

Something in his gaze caused her to turn away. “As soon as I am able.”

There was a long silence, and Mary’s gaze slid to the window. She started to smile, catching sight of Davey. But then she noticed the knight he was speaking to: Sir Kenneth. Mary didn’t understand why her son had suddenly attached himself to the rebel knight. It was as if he’d transferred the adulation he’d had for Sir John to Sir Kenneth. Actually, she’d seen very little of Sir John today. His greeting on seeing her at the midday meal earlier had been stiff and reserved, almost as if he were embarrassed about something.

But it was Sir Kenneth who concerned her. Was he trying to get to her through her son?

“It’s him, isn’t it?”

Mary turned back to Sir Adam in confusion. “What do you mean?”

“Sutherland. He’s the man you met in Scotland. He’s the father of your child.”

Mary’s heart stopped. Her eyes widened in astonishment, and perhaps also in fear.

Sir Adam must have seen it. “You’ve nothing to fear, Mary. Your secret is safe with me. I will do whatever I can to help you. Why do you think I volunteered to go to France and asked you to accompany me?”

Mary continued to stare at him in shock. “You knew?”

A wry smile crossed his hard features. “My wife had ten pregnancies. Even though you’ve put very little weight on—weight that you needed—I know the signs.” He held her gaze, and said softly, “And I know you.”

Mary bit her lip and dropped her eyes, feeling the heat rise to her cheeks. He loves me, she realized with a pang of sadness. How could she not have guessed how he felt all these years? She could see it so clearly now.

She lifted her gaze back to his. “I’m sorry.”

He seemed to know what she meant. She loved him, but not in the way he wanted.

He cleared his throat and looked away to the window. “Does he know? Is that why he has come to England?”

Panic replaced the moment of awkwardness. She shook her head frantically. “Nay, and I have no wish for him to find out. His arrival here has nothing to do with me.”

She could tell Sir Adam didn’t approve. “I’ve known Sutherland for a long time. You need not fear that he will not do right by you.”

“I have no wish for him to do right by me.” A wave of emotion rose in her throat and pricked her eyes. “I can’t do it again. I could never marry another man like Atholl.”