The Proposal (The Proposition #2)(53)

All thoughts of any propriety flew out of her head. The very fact she was making out with another man on Aidan’s front porch should have immediately doused any desire she felt. But instead, her chest rose and fell in rapid breaths.

Pesh tore his lips from hers and started kissing down her neck. Throwing her head back, she murmured, “Mmm, oh Aidan.”

Her eyes flew open as Pesh stilled his lips. A strangled cry erupted from her throat as she pushed away from him. Oh God, she had said his name. In a moment of pure and electric passion with Pesh, she had called out Aidan. Embarrassed tears stung her eyes as she turned to flee.

Pesh grabbed her arm. “Wait, Emma.”

“Oh God, I’m sorry! I’m so, so sorry!” she cried, as tears streaked down her cheeks. She tried pulling away from him to escape because she couldn’t bear to look at his face.

“Stop it, and look at me!” Pesh commanded.

Emma dragged her gaze off the tiled porch floor and up to Pesh’s face. “Please, just let me go. There’s nothing you can say that would make me hate myself any more than I already do.”

Surprise flooded her when he drew her into his strong embrace. “I don’t hate you, so you sure better not hate yourself.”

She jerked her head back to stare incredulously at him. “I just called out the man who broke my heart’s name while I was making out with you!”

Pesh’s expression saddened. “And when I pressed you back against that wall, all I saw in my mind was Jade, and all I wanted to feel was her.”

Instead of being angry, Emma’s heart ached for Pesh. “I’m so, so sorry.”

“I think she confirms what I’ve feared for a long time. We’re just two broken people who aren’t ready for someone else, no matter how hard we try to force it.” He pushed a strand out of her face. “We’re both still desperately in love with other people.”

“I want to love Aidan…I mean, I do love him, desperately at times, but I’m afraid to let myself feel what I do. Your wife was always true to you. She would have never left you.”

“I’ll admit that what Aidan did still infuriates me to where I want to inflict bodily harm on him. But he loves you, Emma. He’s been working his ass off the past two weeks to try to get you to see that.”

“But he can’t even say the words. Every time he tries, he gets interrupted and then he never makes an effort again!”

Pesh took her chin in his fingers and forced her to look him in the eye. “I want you to think about this for a minute? What would you rather have? Words that can be spoken lightly and then taken back so easily, or would you rather actions?”

A reel of images of Aidan’s behavior over the last weeks flickered through her mind. He had risked his job to take care of her. Not to mention, he had cooked everything and anything she wanted, made midnight runs for bacon and ice cream, massaged her feet while watching chick flick movies he hated and held her when she had felt despair.

He smiled. “I don’t know why he can’t say the words, but I know without a doubt he loves you. For most of his life, Aidan probably loved himself more than anyone else in the world. And now he loves you more.” His hand briefly touched her belly. “And he loves his son.”

A sob tore through her chest, and she didn’t fight the tears that came. She threw her arms around Pesh and squeezed tight. “Why do you have to be so wonderful? You should be mad as hell and turning over furniture, calling me a tease or something!”

Pesh laughed. “The last thing I am is a hypocrite. I know exactly how you feel.”

“You’re going to make someone a wonderful husband.” She pulled away to cup his face in her hands. “I want a wife and family for you more than you can ever imagine.”

“It’s just not time, yet, Emma.”

She kissed his cheek tenderly. “I’m going to pray for your heart to open to someone. Jade would want you to be happy.”

Pesh clenched and unclenched his jaw, and Emma knew he was fighting his emotions. “I know she would,” he whispered.

“Then make two women who adore you proud and find yourself a wife.”

His mouth fell open as he stared at her. Emma smiled and nodded. “I do care for you, Pesh. I realize now the feelings I had for you weren’t entirely romantic, despite my behavior in the carriage or here on the porch. Regardless of the fact I love Aidan, I can’t help but care for you deeply.”

“I care for you, too. And I want you to be happy more than anything in the world.” He leaned over and whispered in her ear, “And I think that happiness is right inside that door.”

Tears stung Emma’s eyes. Unable to speak, she bobbed her head in agreement. When Pesh pulled back, he winked at her. “Hurry on in and make Aidan’s night.”

She gave him a final kiss on the cheek before digging the keys out of her coat pocket. “Thanks again for everything.”

“You’re welcome.” He then waved good-bye before hurrying down the porch steps to his car.

Emma’s fingers trembled as she unlocked the door. Tentatively, she stepped inside the house. Darkness enveloped her as she made her way through the living room. She was surprised not to find Aidan awake. Her nose wrinkled as she eyed the beer cans littering the coffee table.

As she took off her coat, something warm and furry brushed against her leg. “Aw, boy, were you waiting for me to come home?”