The Perfect Match (Blue Heron #2)(78)

He was staring at her, mouth slightly open. “Yes, God forbid you should let anyone know you’re human.”

“And what does that mean?” she snapped. “Are you an expert on me all of a sudden?”

There was a knock on the exam room door, and in came Levi, dressed in his police uniform. He jerked to a stop at the sight of them. “Oh. Hey, you two.”

“Hi, Levi,” Honor said, glad for a friendly face. “What are you doing here?”

He drew in a breath. “Uh, I have to ask Tom some questions.”

“What for?” Tom asked.

“The doctor suspects domestic abuse,” Levi answered. “And I did just hear yelling.”

First a catfight, now this. “Do your thing,” she said wearily.

“Mate, it was nothing,” Tom said. “She was helping out at the self-defense class and caught me off guard.”

“So really, this is kind of your fault,” Honor said. “Since the class was your brainchild.”

“I’d have to agree,” Tom said. “It’s certainly not Honor’s.”

Levi did not look amused. “Let me talk to Tom for a second. I have to follow procedure, even if you’re Faith’s sister. Especially because you’re Faith’s sister.”

“You bet.” She slipped out and stood in the hallway. So now her brother-in-law/supercop was investigating her. She sighed, then force-smiled at an old man with an oxygen mask over his face. He didn’t smile back. Poor guy. Honor looked away.

Hospitals had always creeped her out, ever since Mom had died. That had been the worst day, of course. The worst day in her life. She’d been the one to answer the phone; Dad was in the fields, and she was waiting for Mom and Faith to return from Corning. They’d been late, and Honor was jealous, imagining them out to lunch somewhere, or bopping into the cute little shops on Market Street.

“Is your father there, sweetheart?” Chief Griggs had asked, and Honor knew in that second that something horrible had happened. “I need to talk to him.”

“Why?” Honor asked.

“I just do, honey.”

A white, icy fear flashed over her. Her knees buckled, then straightened. “Are they dead?” she whispered.

“Sit tight, okay? Is your dad home?”

“Yes.”

“I’m on my way,” the chief had said, and the terrible kindness in his voice had confirmed it. Death stood in the kitchen with her as she put the phone down on the counter next to her chemistry textbook. It followed her to the back door, out into the yard, and yet she was calm as she called to her father.

Faith and Mom, gone. Dead. So this is what people meant when they said they felt numb.

Dad was going to need her. As Chief Griggs pulled into the driveway, she wrapped her arms around her father’s waist. Heard the words—Faith was okay, but Constance didn’t make it.

Honor felt her dad sag, heard the horrible small sound that he made as the chief said the words. Held his brittle, dry hand all the way to the hospital where one ambulance had taken Faith, and one had taken Mom.

That ambulance would’ve gone more slowly, Honor thought, standing outside Faith’s room as Daddy went in. No lights, no sirens. Somewhere below her, her mother’s body was being slipped into a dark, cold cupboard.

Mommy.

The horrible magnitude of the loss threatened to swallow her whole and suck her down. The only one who really got her, who had made her feel so special, was gone. It was over. Life would never be the same, never as good, as whole, as happy.

The black grief had to be held off, though. Honor was her mother’s daughter: calm, logical, pragmatic. No one else in the family was like them. She would keep her shit together, she would duct-tape her heart so it wouldn’t shatter and she’d do what had to be done.

But those happy, perfect days of wholeness...they were done.

Only with Brogan—and only once in a great while, admittedly—did she ever get a little glimpse of that again. Not that she’d been miserable. Just that life hadn’t been firing on all cylinders. She’d been waiting since she was sixteen years old to have that piece of her returned, and every once in a while, when she and Brogan were out to dinner together or when he forgot what time zone he was in and called her in the middle of the night had she ever glimpsed a sliver of what she’d been missing.

Which did make her wonder what she was doing with Tom. He was still mostly a stranger...a stranger who flirted with anything that sported br**sts and a pulse. Who was occasionally so wonderful that she’d start to hope for that missing piece, only to have him withdraw seconds later.

The door opened, and the man in question appeared, Levi close behind him. “I’ve decided not to press charges,” Tom said. “So long as you’re on your best behavior from now on.”

“Very funny,” she said.

“You guys need anything?” Levi asked.

“We’re all set,” she said. “Thanks, Levi. Sorry you had to come out here.”

“All in a day’s work,” he said. “See you soon.” He started to walk away, then turned and looked at them, a frown creasing his forehead. “Are you guys sure you’re okay?”

“We’re fine, mate,” Tom said, sliding an arm around her shoulders. “Right, darling?”