The Pairing (The Proposition #3)(60)

“Fine,” Megan muttered.

“I realize that deep down he’s just a man, and after going a long time without sex, it was probably a little easier for him to give in to just a causal relationship with you. But I’ve worked by his side for seven years, so I have a pretty good handle on what he’s truly feeling.”

“Oh really?” Megan countered, unable to stop herself from being snarky.

“Yes, I do. That man loves you with every fiber of his being.”

Those words caused Megan’s steely resolve to fade. She couldn’t help staggering a bit on her feet. She knew that Pesh liked her—I mean, any fool could see that. But love? “H-He does?”

“Oh yeah, he does. He’s been holding a candle for you since the moment you walked in here. I saw it the first day I introduced you two. I don’t know what has happened since that day, but I know something has changed for you, too.”

“It’s true that I care about him. He’s the most amazing man I’ve ever known.”

“Then what the hell is the problem?”

“I wish I could tell you, but I don’t even know myself,” Megan moaned as tears stung her eyes. “Dammit, stupid PMS hormones.”

“Oh honey, you do actually care about him, don’t you?”

“Yes,” she whispered.

“And you’re a wreck about what you’re feeling for him, aren’t you?” Kristi asked.

Megan couldn’t hold back the sobs any longer. They rolled through her, causing her to bend at the waist under the burden. Kristi stepped forward, wrapping her arms around Megan. Even though she knew she should try to fight her emotions considering she was at work, she decided to let herself go and get it all out. When she finally had a hold of herself, she raised her head, wiping what she imagined were the hideous black mascara streaks off her face.

“I’m so sorry. That was so unprofessional of me.”

Kristi gave her a sad smile. “Would you stop that, please? This isn’t an evaluation. Besides, I’m the one who pulled you in here and provoked you. You always keep your emotions in check out on the floor.”

“The truth is I do care for Pesh. How could I not? I’m just not sure I’m the right woman for him.”

“But if he loves you, how could you think you’re not the right one?”

Megan blurted out all the reasons she’d previously given Pesh about her age and her lack of wanting a committed relationship. When she finally finished unburdening herself of all her doubts and fears, she glanced up at Kristi. There was no judgment in her eyes or anger for that matter. Instead, she merely patted Megan’s cheek. “Oh honey, you’ve got to tune all those negative voices out and go with your heart.”

Megan shook head. “But what if I don’t know what my heart is telling me to do?”

“You will. Just give it time.” Kristi patted her back. “Why don’t you go get cleaned up and then take your lunch break?”

“No, I need to make up for the time I’ve missed.”

“You’re fine.” She motioned to the door. “Go on. See if Dr. Nadeen is on his way to lunch so you can join him.”

“But I shouldn’t. It won’t look right if we’re alone together.”

Kristi chuckled. “Alone together in a crowded hospital cafeteria? I don’t think that’s possible.”

Megan nibbled on her bottom lip and fought the urge to argue with Kristi. After all, if the very woman who was in charge of her clinical grade didn’t give a shit about her and Pesh being seen together, why should she? Finally, she just gave a defeated sigh. “Okay, I’ll go see.”

“Good girl. And you be listening to your heart now. Okay?”

“I’ll try. I promise.”

Although she spoke the words with such conviction of character, Megan was afraid it was going to be harder than she thought.

Chapter Seventeen

When Pesh arrived at work the following day, he found Kristi alone in the nurses’ station. Gazing around, he asked, “Where’s Megan?”

“Oh, she called in sick today.”

Both disappointment and concern filled him. She had seemed a little off the night before when they had dinner together in the cafeteria. She was quieter and somewhat withdrawn. He had just chalked it up to the fact that they were sitting with some of the other staff and she was trying not to make things seem weird with them now.

He wondered if he should call her and check to make sure she was okay. They were in such limbo together that even though it sounded like the right thing to do, he wasn’t sure. With a resigned sigh, he decided to leave things as they were and vowed to check on her tomorrow when she returned to work.

As much as Pesh hated to admit it, the day dragged mercilessly without Megan. He went from patient to patient with a monotony he hadn’t felt in a long time. When his shift ended, he met Kristi in the hallway. “Want me to walk you out?” he suggested.

“Thank you. I’d appreciate that.”

“It would be my pleasure.”

They started out the mechanized doors to the employee parking lot. To fill the quiet of their shoes echoing on the pavement, he said, “I hated to hear that Megan wasn’t feeling well.”

“So did I. Poor thing offered to pull a double tomorrow to make up for being gone.” Kristi smiled. “She sure is going to make a fine nurse.”