Taking It All (Surrender Trilogy #3)(57)

“You look very distressed,” the doctor said in a concerned voice. “Is someone here with you? Should I summon them?”

“No,” she murmured. “I’ll be fine. It’s just a shock. I was—am—on birth control.” Then another thought hit her and she stared anxiously up at her doctor. “I’ve continued to take birth control. Will that hurt the baby?”

“Well you certainly need to discontinue them,” he advised. “But I doubt you’ve done any harm to the fetus. You’ll need to get an appointment with an obstetrician so they can do a sonogram to determine your due date. And they’ll want you to go in for routine prenatal care. I can give you a referral unless you already have someone in mind.”

Her head was spinning trying to process the bombardment of information. Pregnant. Separated from her husband. A husband she now had to tell she was pregnant.

A few minutes later, she stumbled back into the waiting room where Joss sat. Joss took one look at her and her brow furrowed in concern. She met her halfway across the room, putting an arm around her for support.

“Chessy, what’s wrong?” Joss demanded. “What did the doctor say? Did he give you a prescription for something to help your anxiety?”

Chessy closed her eyes. “What he gave me was more anxiety.”

“I don’t understand.”

“I’m pregnant, Joss.”

Joss stared at her in shock. Her mouth fell open. “Oh my God, Chessy. What are you going to do? I know how much you wanted children but Tate wanted to hold off.”

“I didn’t do this on purpose,” Chessy said fiercely. “I know we talked about it at some point before Tate and I separated. But I acknowledged that a baby wouldn’t fix our problems. I’d never purposely become pregnant with our relationship in the shape it was.”

“I never thought you did this on purpose,” Joss soothed. “But hon, the timing is horrible. Tate is going to want you back more now than ever.”

Tears gathered in Chessy’s eyes. “I don’t want him back because of the baby. I want him to want me. To put me first. I have no doubt he’d put his child first. Is it selfish of me to want that priority over my baby?”

“God no,” Joss denied. “You should expect to come first with your husband. There’s no question of that. How do you plan to tell him?”

Chessy sighed wearily as they exited the clinic and walked to Joss’s car in the parking lot. “I don’t know. I have to think about this. This changes everything, Joss.”

“On the bright side, we’ll be pregnant together!” Joss said, smiling over at Chessy as she put her car in reverse.

Chessy attempted a smile. “Our children will grow up BFFs just like us.”

“Now we just have to get Kylie knocked up and it will be a trifecta!”

“Don’t hold your breath,” Chessy said in amusement. “I don’t think Kylie has plans to be pregnant any time soon if ever. And Jensen seems content with her decision.”

“And she’d make such a good mother,” Joss said sadly. “I hate that her decision is based on her own terrible childhood. Her worry that she’d ever treat a child of hers like her father treated her is ridiculous. There isn’t a sweeter, more generous soul out there.”

“Oh I agree,” Chessy said. “But I think it’s good that she’s waiting. Having children doesn’t necessarily complete a couple. There’s nothing wrong with devoting themselves to each other because, let’s face it, the minute a baby enters the picture, priorities change completely.”

Oh my God. The moment the words came out of her mouth, she realized that she could have well just voiced how her parents felt. That they’d devoted their time to each other, a child an unwanted intrusion. All the neglect that had been heaped upon her during her childhood was never what she wanted for her own child. In fact, even if she and Tate did get back together, her first and only priority had to be her child. Not Tate.

“Very true,” Joss conceded. “And you’re right. Having babies isn’t a necessary component in living happily ever after. Besides, Kylie will now have two babies to spoil. She can be Auntie Kylie and the best part is, she can give them back and sleep through the night, unlike us who’ll be up at all hours.”

“You’re not selling me on this motherhood thing,” Chessy said dryly.

“Sorry. I won’t say another word. My lips are sealed.”

“I wish I could share this with Tate,” Chessy said in a wistful voice. “Not that I’m going to keep it from him. I’m not. But I just wish things were different. That he could have gone to the doctor with me. That we were still together and he met the news with joy. This isn’t ever how I envisioned getting the word that I was pregnant with my first baby.”

Joss reached across the console and curled her hand around Chessy’s. “I know it’s not the way you wanted it to happen, but a baby is a blessing and you’re going to be an awesome mom, Chessy. You can do this. We’ll take childbirth classes together. I’ll let you borrow all my pregnancy books and we can even use the same OB doctor and schedule our appointments on the same days.”

The enthusiasm in Joss’s voice was contagious. Chessy felt the first kernel of excitement since having the proverbial bomb dropped on her in the doctor’s office.