Sweet Addiction (Sweet #6)(32)

She flinched as he pulled out of her ass. Her desire had slipped away the moment Lucas had mentioned the word good-bye. She was frozen, caught in a wasteland. She didn’t want to be having sex with Cole. She wanted to be with Lucas. She wanted him to be the one taking care of her and commanding her.

Gently, Cole turned her in his arms and then cradled her close, his hand smoothing over her hair. He didn’t say anything. He simply held her, his chin resting on top of her head.

“I’m sorry,” he said simply. “I never intended to cause you hurt.”

No, she sensed he was as out of sorts as she was with Lucas’s sudden departure. What she didn’t know is if this was a predetermined arrangement or if Cole was just annoyed at how Lucas had handled it. Either way, she now belonged to another man for the next two weeks and deep down she feared that Lucas wouldn’t be back for her. Ever.

CHAPTER 15

Now that Lucas had departed, Ren felt awkwardness descend. She wasn’t sure what she was supposed to do. How she was supposed to feel. She was a blunt, direct person, but right now, the very last thing she wanted was to discuss her feelings. She’d rather drink acid.

Already she could feel herself unraveling. The boundaries seemed to crumble. She hated this feeling. Hadn’t felt this way sense she’d fled her last relationship and had been so desperate to reestablish her parameters. Her safety net.

Oh God, what if he didn’t come back? What if he, like Cole, chose to just simply walk away?

And then Cole’s voice. Sharp. Lean like a whip. Crisp. Cut into her scattered thoughts and snapped her to awareness.

“Get up.”

She blinked but hastened to do his bidding.

“On your knees.”

She sank to her knees and dropped her gaze to the floor.

“Look at me.”

She lifted her chin enough that she could look into his eyes. He stared back at her. Hard. Determined.

“Who owns you now, Ren?”

“You do,” she said quietly.

“Then let’s establish a few things.”

She was so grateful that tears swam in her eyes. Had he known just how much she’d needed this? She needed this direction. This focus. Needed the discipline. She needed him to be firm, because if he was gentle right now, she’d fall apart.

She wanted the security and the safety of his dominance. She desperately needed to reestablish the boundaries and know her place.

He stood, peeling the condom from his softening erection. He strode across the room, leaving her kneeling in front of the couch. After disposing of the condom, he tucked himself back into his pants and then stood there, his gaze trailing over Ren. It was as if he stroked her with his hand.

“Go to the middle of the room and kneel.”

She rose and walked on unsteady legs to the center and then lowered herself back down onto the plush area rug. It occurred to her that he hadn’t wanted her to kneel on the hardwood floor as she had been. Some of her panic and anxiety eased.

“For the next two weeks, you belong solely to me, Ren,” Cole said in a quiet, firm voice that sent shivers down her spine.

There was steel in that voice. A dark promise that excited and reassured her at the same time.

“You will do as I command with no hesitation. Your body is mine. You are mine. Understood?”

“Yes,” she whispered.

“You’ll answer a few questions for me and then we’ll discuss your accommodations here as well as my expectations.”

She nodded her acceptance.

“Do you and Lucas use a safe word?”

“We did in the beginning.”

“And not now?”

She shook her head. “I trust him. He knows me better than I know myself. I could still use it. I mean, it’s not that he’d ignore it. It’s just that I’ve never had to.”

“You should choose one with me.”

Her heart twisted. Her mind rebelled. Logically she understood and even embraced the need for one. Every time she’d started a new relationship, boundaries had always been set. A safe word had been established. Cole and Lucas had been the only two men she’d ever fully trusted, though, and something inside her balked at the idea that even now Cole would somehow hurt her.

She looked deeper, studying the firm set of his mouth and the intense blue of his eyes.

“It was an accident, Cole,” she offered quietly. “I know you’d never hurt me.”

He flinched. Then he recovered and his jaw tightened as if she’d angered him.

“You’re a fool if you trust me so blindly. I’m not the same man, Ren. I’m a hell of a lot harder.”

“Good.”

His brow furrowed. He was taken aback by her response.

She lifted her chin. “I don’t want easy. I’ve never wanted easy.”

For a moment he didn’t say anything. Then he closed the distance between them until he stood a mere foot away, staring down at her from his imposing height.

“Your safe word, Ren. Choose it now.”

“Lucas.”

The word fell between them, and how appropriate the safe word was. It was a name she’d never invoke with Cole unless she was at her very limit. It was also the name of the man with whom she felt the safest with.

She saw his realization that if she did ever use her safe word that it would be the same as walking away—or rather running back to Lucas.