Susannah's Garden (Blossom Street #3)(71)
“He said I shouldn’t worry about money,” she whispered. Her heart ached as she looked at her friend. “What did he do?” she asked. “Where was he getting money?”
“I have my suspicions,” Carolyn said in a low voice.
“But why would Doug get involved in anything like that?”
Carolyn’s gaze met hers in the dim light outside the tavern. “I don’t know and I doubt we ever will.”
“Do you think that comment Sharon made about Doug not being the only one meant Jake was part of it, too?” she asked. “Jake and Doug?” Susannah broached the subject carefully, afraid of the answer. So many of the memories she’d nurtured were being destroyed. Everything she’d believed was turning out to be something else, and Susannah felt she no longer knew what was real and what wasn’t. It gave her an unexpected insight into the kind of confusion her mother must feel.
“Sharon would say anything to upset you,” Carolyn reminded her. “I don’t know how much credit we should give any of the stuff she said.”
“Right.” Susannah agreed in theory. “Could Troy really be Jake’s son?” she asked tentatively. When they’d started dating, Jake had been wild and undisciplined—the stereotypical bad boy. In contrast, she’d been the good girl, and the attraction between them was powerful. She’d made clear to Jake that if he wanted to be with her, he’d have to change, and he’d tried. He’d loved her, and had tried to prove himself to her and her father. Except that the mighty Judge Leary had refused to talk to Jake, had refused to have anything to do with him.
Everything she’d learned about Jake in these past few weeks had shattered the image she’d held of him and now, it seemed, her brother, too. For the first time since she’d arrived in Colville, she longed for her life in Seattle. Her summers there were peaceful, spent working in her garden and doing small projects around the house. The year before, she’d taken an upholstery class and reupholstered the dining room chairs and then, in a burst of enthusiasm, wallpapered the kitchen. A one-week jaunt to Hawaii with Joe had been an added bonus. By comparison, this summer felt like a nightmare with no escape and no end.
Once inside her car, Susannah gripped the steering wheel tightly. “I have to wonder exactly what the truth is. I have no idea anymore.”
“Surely there’s a way to find out.”
Susannah wasn’t convinced she wanted to dig up information that might best be left buried. She said as much to Carolyn.
But Carolyn shook her head. “You can’t leave it there, especially if Sharon’s implicating Doug in some kind of wrongdoing. And her hints about Jake—don’t you want to know if there’s any truth to them?”
“Oh, my gosh! Shirl Remington mentioned that she was inquiring about Jake in Canada. If he was in trouble, he might’ve fled there.”
“So many young men went north to avoid the draft,” Carolyn said.
“I might never find him, then. Especially if he changed his name.” It was a possibility Susannah hadn’t considered before. “At this point I don’t even care. He obviously isn’t the boy I remember or the man I thought he was.”
Her friend shrugged. “You’ve paid the investigator. You might as well listen to what she has to say.”
Susannah started the engine and turned onto the highway that led back to town. “I guess you’re right,” she said reluctantly.
They rode in silence for a while before Carolyn asked, “Listen, would you mind if I went with you to that private investigator?”
Whatever Carolyn’s reason, Susannah was grateful for the company. “That’d be fine. But…oh, Carolyn, I don’t think I could stand it if Doug did anything illegal. I mean, that’s not what Shirl’s looking for, but if he was involved with Jake in some stupid scheme, it might all come out. I’m really not sure I want to know.”
“Not even if it’s the truth?”
“I can’t believe any of this is happening. I wish I’d never found that agreement between my father and Allan Presley. That’s what got me into all this.” In any case, it was what had intensified her need to search for Jake.
As Susannah drove the dark country road to Carolyn’s home, she felt an overwhelming sense of discouragement. The road and the house looked much the same as they had when she and Carolyn were kids. And yet that sameness struck her as false. Nothing was as it seemed. Past and present seemed to blur, leading her to doubt the truth of her own history.
She turned down the long driveway and parked, and Carolyn climbed out of the car. “What time do you want to leave tomorrow?” she asked, sounding as casual as if they were meeting for some ordinary event.
Susannah bit her lip, calculating the distance. “About eleven-thirty.”
Carolyn nodded. “I’ll be at your house by eleven.”
“Okay. See you then.”
Susannah waited until Carolyn was inside and the lights were on before she reversed her route and headed back into Colville.
As she drove, she considered calling Joe, despite the lateness of the hour. She didn’t blame him for his unhappiness with her. They rarely argued, and she hated this. The problem was, Susannah didn’t know what she could say other than to apologize and she’d already done that.