Susannah's Garden (Blossom Street #3)(49)

“He did, but there was another reason. An equally important one.” She straightened, avoiding Susannah’s eyes. “You might have guessed that my parents’ marriage wasn’t a good one.”

Susannah had wondered about it. She made a noncommittal sound, encouraging Carolyn to continue.

“Mom never adjusted to life in Colville. She hated it here and felt trapped, but almost everyone she loved had been killed in the war. My dad couldn’t leave her. He wouldn’t do that, so he made the best of it until…until I left home and then, well, he fell in love with someone else.”

“Your father had an affair?”

Carolyn nodded. “Lily was his secretary for twenty years and his lover, too.”

Susannah couldn’t imagine why her friend would be telling her something so painful and so private. Unless…“You think my father…had a mistress?”

“I don’t know, but it might explain where the money was going.”

“Thousands upon thousands of dollars,” Susannah whispered, shocked as she considered the possibility.

“Dad genuinely loved Lily,” Carolyn said. “When he knew he was dying, he called me home. He wanted me to look after her when he was gone.”

Susannah was appalled. “I can’t believe he’d ask that of you.”

“It wasn’t easy for me, but I did it because I loved my father. I’m fairly certain Mom never knew. Or if she did find out, she never let on.”

“What happened to Lily?”

Uncharacteristic tears clouded her friend’s eyes. “She died last year. When I got to know her, I loved her, too. She was more of a mother to me than my own. I buried her next to my father. It was what he would’ve wanted.”

“And your mother?”

“She’s on his other side.”

The idea of her father having another woman was inconceivable to Susannah. But then, she was quickly learning that she really didn’t know him. Not once had she suspected that he’d paid off Jake’s father. Just thinking about it made the anger race through her again.

“I’m going to find Jake,” she insisted. “I refuse to let my father get away with this. I don’t care if he had a mistress. I don’t want to know. But I do care about finding Jake. I’m going to put his name in the computer and see what comes up.” There had to be Web sites that let you search for missing people.

“What about Joe?” Carolyn asked.

For a moment, she’d conveniently pushed all thought of her husband and his likely reaction from her mind. It was easy to do, easy to pretend he wouldn’t disapprove. He was in Seattle and she was here in Colville, and they had never seemed so far apart.

“He’ll understand,” Susannah said. Then, she added, “I won’t tell Joe, not unless I actually find Jake.” Why upset him for no reason?

“Do you want my opinion?” Carolyn asked.

Susannah contemplated the question. She was interested in what her friend had to say, and at the same time she feared that Carolyn would tell her to drop this before she got in too deep. That would be good advice; unfortunately it wasn’t what Susannah wanted to hear.

“You’re going to tell me to let go of this.” Susannah wished she could. But she had to talk to Jake, if for no other reason than to apologize for her family’s mistreatment of him.

“Not necessarily. What I want you to remember,” Carolyn said, leaning back and sipping her wine, “is that time in France.”

“You think I can forget? That year everything changed for me.”

“I recall how you waited and waited for a letter from Jake. For weeks on end you defended him, made excuses for why he didn’t write and then after a while you didn’t talk about him anymore. It seemed like you no longer cared.”

“Of course I still cared, but I had other things to think about!”

Carolyn agreed with a nod. “Doug.”

“I’d lost my brother and not hearing from Jake didn’t seem important after that—but I did ask about him when I got home. With no success, and now we know why.”

Carolyn grew quiet again, then shook her head briskly, as if to chase unhappy memories away. “We’re both reacting to the discussion we had with Sandy, Yvette and Lisa the other night.”

“Both?” Susannah raised her eyebrows.

“I…I decided to extend my flower beds at the house.” Her friend blushed as she said it.

“And you requested that landscaping guy,” Susannah finished.

Carolyn gazed down at her wine. “He’s going to stop by tomorrow afternoon to give me an estimate. I know I’m being obvious, but Susannah, I can’t stop thinking about him. It all started with that silly conversation and now I’m wondering where it’ll end—for you and for me.”

Susannah wondered, too. “All I know is that Jake’s been on my mind for weeks, even before I learned what my dad had done. I’m determined to find him, only…only…”

“What?”

Susannah sighed morosely. “I don’t have a computer here.”

“I do,” Carolyn said, as if it was understood that she’d help. “Come back to the house with me. I’ll log on to a couple of search engines and see what we can come up with.”