Sunset to Sunrise (Alexa O'Brien, Huntress #7.5)(19)

Then I hung up before she could tell me to go f*ck myself.

For a long time, I lay there staring at the ceiling. I waited for the inner conflict to start again. It didn’t. I knew what I had to do.

There were many reasons for me to want Arys dead. So many reasons. And not one of them mattered. It wasn’t going to happen. Not on my watch. Alexa no longer trusted me. That was fair. I’d earned it. This was an opportunity for me to show her that somewhere inside me, I was still the person she had trusted to have her back in the face of danger. I was still someone she could count on.

Maybe that was all a lie. My mood shifted so quickly. I could go from loving her desperately to loathing her viciously with merely a thought. Both emotions came from the same place, the part of me that belonged solely to her.

“Fuck,” I muttered. “Who am I kidding? She can’t f*cking trust me.”

I punched a fist into the mattress, but it did nothing to ease my frustration. Sitting here alone in this godforsaken room in this shit show of a nightclub made it easy to convince myself that things weren’t as bad between Alexa and me as they seemed. When in fact, they were worse. It was too late to go back. Too much had happened. We had both made mistakes though mine were much greater.

Nothing I could ever do would repair the damage done. I might never even be able to stand in the same room as Alexa without wanting to hurt her. But that wasn’t her fault. And regardless of how screwed up I was, I couldn’t stand back and watch Phillip’s crew take a shot at Arys. I could never do that to Alexa.

Making that decision felt like a small breakthrough. Maybe I wasn’t too far gone yet. I laughed, a harsh sound that caused Lily to stir.

With a groan, I got up and grabbed the naked woman, lightly slapping her face. The sooner I got her up and in a cab out of here, the better. I needed some time to quiet my thoughts before nightfall when I would hunt down Phillip and his rebel crew.

Shya had given the order, but I wasn’t doing it for him. Letting him think so was fine with me. If I was being completely honest with myself, I wasn’t even really doing it for Alexa. I was doing it for me. Because somewhere inside me, I still wanted to pretend I was the man she had once thought I was.

* * * *

The party hadn’t stopped while I’d been locked away inside my room. When I emerged after sundown freshly showered in clean clothes, I found the club to be exactly the way I had left it. Vampires and victims littered the place. Clothing lay scattered about. I could barely take ten steps without stepping on somebody’s undergarments. Blood scented the air. The doors were not yet open to the public, which was a good thing considering my doormen were happily partaking in the blood orgy madness.

This wasn’t good. Eventually the FPA would discover what was going on here. If they shut the place down, I’d never hear the end of it.

“Justin.” I tapped the big guy on the shoulder, interrupting his enjoyment of two blondes that appeared to be twins. “Everyone needs to be cleared out. I want the place empty before we open. These people need to go home.”

He looked up with a malicious glint in his dark eyes. It took him a moment to focus on me there. Blood dripped from his mouth, and he licked it away with a grin.

“The boss lady isn’t back already, is she?” He asked.

“No. But she will be eventually. As much as I enjoy the club with a little extra entertainment, it’s going to land my ass in hot water. It’s got to stop.”

Justin didn’t look happy about it, but he nodded in agreement. “Just let me finish up here, and I’ll take care of it.”

“Thank you. I’ll be in and out tonight. I have something to take care of.” I turned to go but paused, adding as an afterthought, “Don’t let anyone from the FPA in here tonight. Not even Alexa’s sister.”

I lingered to ensure things were getting done. The staff did a great job cleaning up empty glasses and bottles, mopping up and generally making the place look as close to normal as it ever did. Now if we could just keep it that way…

Phillip got my attention the minute he strode in through the backdoor. If he was here, that meant the rest of his band of merry men and women were without their fearless leader. Sitting ducks. I didn’t wait around to see if he stayed. Alexa wouldn’t be gone long. A week at best, though I didn’t find that likely. I needed to take care of this before she returned.

As I made my way across the parking lot to my car, a woman I didn’t recognize called my name from her place in the lineup waiting to get in. I gave a slight nod before getting in the car and slamming the door. Revving the engine, I tore out of the lot before she could pursue me.

Being a hell of a good lover earned me many female admirers. I wasn’t one to boast—the ladies did more than enough of that for me—however, throughout the years I had earned a reputation among them. At least, I had among the ones who had left my bed alive. It wasn’t all that flattering really. Having women throw themselves at me had at one time been an exciting stroke of the ego. Now it was tedious and shallow. They viewed me much the way I viewed them, as a fun means to an end. There was no risk of that when I killed.

I headed for the Clover Bar Cemetery. Dialing Rebecca’s number, I tapped a finger impatiently on the steering wheel. It would come as no surprise if she avoided my call or told me to f*ck off. She was the easiest way to find out where the rebel group might be.