Songbird(29)

And then just as quickly she folded inward. Her face crumpled and her knees buckled. She slid bonelessly to the floor, her sobs searing over Taggert’s shocked senses.

Taggert dropped to his knees beside her, but Greer was already there, folding his arms around her huddled body.

“Shhh, sweet pea. It’s okay. It’s going to be okay. I swear.”

Emily raised her tear-streaked face to stare up at Greer. “I know he’s gone, Greer. I sang for him today. Only for him, though. I didn’t know it would feel so good.”

Taggert closed his eyes and cursed the timing of Frank’s visit. Maybe she’d come around on her own, but she was raw and hurting, and then Frank had arrived determined to make her see the light.

Greer rocked her in his arms, holding her tight as he moved back and forth. “He loved your singing, Emmy. He was so proud of you. You were the reason he learned to play the guitar. It was his way of sharing your gift with you. Don’t take that away from him. Don’t take it away from us.”

“It killed him,” she whispered.

“No, baby. No.”

No longer able to keep silent or remain back, Taggert pressed forward, putting his hand on her shoulder. Her eyes, deeply wounded, sought him out, looking, asking.

“Emmy, you can’t think that. Your attacker was a sick bastard. Do you understand that? It wasn’t you. It was him.”

She looked away, and Taggert blew out his breath in frustration. Then she looked back, a pleading expression in her beautiful eyes.

“I know that. I do, Tagg. But every time I close my eyes I see him, I hear his voice, and I know that if I’d never sung Sean would still be alive, and that’s hard for me to come to terms with even if it’s stupid, and I know it’s not logical but guilt isn’t logical. God I wish it was. I wish I could just turn it off. I felt Sean today. I felt him, and I knew he wanted me to sing, and so I did. I even thought I could go on, but then Frank came, and all I could feel was that panic inside and the knowledge that I couldn’t take a chance on losing one of you just because I want something so inconsequential as to sing again. Isn’t that insane?”

The speech came out all run together and ended in a laugh that verged on hysteria.

“Emmy. Songbird. Our Songbird.”

The words spilled past stiff lips and cracked with emotion. Taggert swallowed and stroked her hair, hoping he could come up with the right thing to say.

“It doesn’t have to be now. It doesn’t have to be tomorrow. But one day, baby. One day you’ll feel safe. You’ll sing. And we’ll be here to help you fly.”

Chapter Thirteen

Supper was quiet, and Emily could feel the stares of Greer and Taggert. A heavy sigh escaped her before she could call it back.

She’d honestly thought she was through with the emotional breakdowns. Her visit to Sean’s grave had been freeing. And then Frank’s visit had brought old fears back.

“Emmy, what are you thinking?”

She glanced up to see Taggert studying her intently.

“I’m okay. Promise. I’m sorry for freaking out on you. Again. It seems it’s all I can do lately.”

“Cut yourself some slack,” Greer said in a gruff voice. “You’ve been through a lot.”

She pushed her food around the plate, grateful that Taggert had dismissed Buck and the hands to eat in the bunkhouse. The last thing she felt like doing was pretending her world wasn’t crumbling around her.

Be a little more dramatic, why don’t you?

She made a sound of disgust.

“My world is not ending,” she muttered.

Taggert’s lip lifted in a half smile. “I should hope not. Greer and I aren’t that bad.”

She laughed, relief soaring through her chest. It was so easy to love him. The idea that she could finally be open with that love floored her.

Slowly she lowered her fork, her pulse speeding up as the two brothers watched her.

“Take me upstairs,” she said huskily. “Please. I need you. Love me.”

Taggert picked up her hand and brought it to his lips. “I do love you.”

Greer shoved his plate aside and rose abruptly. When he reached for her, his hands shook. She took his hand and brought it to her mouth just as Taggert had done to her.

The work-roughened fingers brushed across her skin, and she closed her eyes, imagining them on her body, caressing her, touching her intimately.

“Take us upstairs, Emmy. Show us what you need.”

Need? She needed them. Their love. She needed them to hold her and stand between her and the nightmares.

Taking both their hands, she twined her fingers with theirs and tugged them toward the stairs.

She was nervous. Her food churned in her stomach. Maybe she’d never really quite get over the idea that Taggert and Greer were here with her. Loving her.

They followed her into the bedroom, and they stood waiting as she slowly turned around to face them. Her heart fluttered wildly, and she swallowed as she curled and uncurled her fingers at her sides. Then she squared her shoulders and took that step.

In her wildest fantasies, she’d done this a million times, but the reality threatened to steal her breath away. Her hands shook and her fingers were clumsy as she worked at the buttons on Greer’s shirt. She worked down, her gaze never leaving his face, watching as his eyes flared and simmered like coals.