Somebody to Love(102)

“I did,” James said. “He hasn’t heard from Nick. He’s getting a flight up.”

“Where was he the last time you saw him?” she asked James, forcing herself to look at him, and in that moment, she hated him, God help her, and hated herself, as well, because she’d left her baby, her boy, her son, with him, and James had lost him.

James flinched, as if he knew what she was thinking. “I was making dinner. Macaroni and cheese. He was on the couch, playing with his little computer thing—”

“Nintendo.” God, she’d left her son with a man who knew nothing about children, who’d told her he knew nothing about children, and she wouldn’t listen, she did what she wanted—

“—and then he was…gone.” His voice broke. It didn’t matter. He didn’t matter. Only Nicky mattered.

“Did you go anywhere today? To the hardware store? To the harbor?”

“No.”

“Maybe he went to the Pines,” Lavinia suggested in a wobbly voice. “I told him his great-great grandfather built the place.”

The chief dispatched a crew to go up the street. Collier squeezed Parker’s shoulder and went with them.

It was fully dark now.

What did Nicky love? What would make him go off…?

“He’s hiding,” Parker said abruptly. “He hides all the time. He loves forts, and he took the nail gun and he’s hiding in a fort somewhere. Where’s Beauty? Maybe she’s with him.”

Beauty, who never barked at strangers; Beauty, who hid when people came into the house.

“Call the dog,” the chief instructed. “People, quiet down!” The crowd, which had grown to maybe fifty or so, grew silent. “Cut the trucks.” The growl of the town’s three fire trucks died abruptly. “Go ahead, Miss Welles.”

“Beauty!” Her voice was quavering and weak. “Beauty, girl! Come on!”

Everyone was silent, listening.

“Beauty! Come on, girl! Let’s go for a swim! Come on, Beauty!” Better, if edged with hysteria.

There was nothing but the sound of wind and water.

Oh, please, God, please. She tried again. “Beauty! Come on, sweetie! Let’s go for a swim!”

Then she heard it—the whine of her faithful little dog.

“Over here!” someone yelled, and Parker was running. People were shining lights at the bottom of the house, where James had put up latticework so no skunks could get under there. But there was a shallow scraping in the dirt, enough so that a child and a dog could fit under there. James ripped off a great chunk of the lattice, and Parker grabbed a flashlight and wriggled under, spiderwebs veiling her hair, sand in her pants. Then her light caught the reflection of her dog’s eyes, and she saw Nicky’s head, the cowlick he got from Ethan. “Nicky?” she called, reaching out to touch him. He was warm. He was breathing. “Nicky, sweetheart?”

Her son opened his eyes. “Mommy! You’re back.”

“I got him,” she called over her shoulder, and a cheer went up from the crowd. “Nick, we’ve been looking for you, baby.”

“I fell asleep in my fort,” he said, rubbing his eyes. “Mommy? Why are you crying?”

* * *

LATER, WHEN EVERYONE had patted her son, when Chief Tatum had given him a plastic fire hat, when the yard and road had cleared, when Ethan had been called, when Nicky had been fed and bathed, Parker just held her son on her lap.

“I’m sorry,” Nicky said for the millionth time.

“This is why you tell me if you’re going to hide,” Parker said, kissing his head.

“You weren’t here.” There was a hard edge of resentment in his little voice.

No. She wasn’t. “You should’ve told James, then.”

“I don’t like James,” Nicky said sullenly, and Parker knew he blamed James for all the fuss, for Mommy being scared and crying. “I want to go home and live with Daddy.”

“We’re going home in a few days.”

“Good. Because I hate it here. And I wanna live with Daddy.” He started to cry.

She kissed his head and held him a little tighter. “Listen, honey. Everyone makes mistakes. It’s what you do after the mistake that really matters. You don’t hide without telling a grown-up, and you never go somewhere you don’t know is safe. Promise me, Nicky. It’s really, really important.”

“Fine. I promise.” He took a shuddering breath and snuggled closer. “I love you, Mommy.”

“Oh, sweetheart, I love you, too. So, so much.”

She held him until he fell asleep, breathing in the scent of baby shampoo. Then she put him in her bed and got in beside him, calling quietly to Beauty to jump up next to them.

Thank you, God. She could’ve been in the E.R. right now. She could’ve been watching a boat drag the harbor. She could’ve been picking out a little casket. Oh, Jesus, thank you for sparing me that.

Little sobs jerked out of her as she smoothed Nicky’s hair. Beauty put her muzzle on Nicky’s leg and watched with her mournful eyes as Parker wept.

Her cell phone buzzed, and she looked at the screen. Ethan.

“Hey,” she whispered. They’d already spoken twice since Nicky had been found.