Shelter Mountain (Virgin River #2)(60)

“I don’t know if that’ll do it for me,” Rick said. “I know this is crazy…”

“What does Liz say?”

He laughed, but it was a hollow sound. “She wants to quit school right now. Run away and get married. You have any idea how awful school is for her?”

Jack suddenly felt pretty stupid—of all the things he could focus on, be aware of, it had never occurred to him how terrible it might be for a fifteen-year-old pregnant girl to attend school every day. And since she’d only been in that school a couple of months the spring before, it was practically a new school for her at that. She might as well have a tattoo on her forehead. “Aw, Rick,” he said. “I’m so sorry to hear that.”

“I try to be there for her after every class, get her to the next class. I’m late a lot. I’m getting in trouble a lot. It sucks so much.” He sighed deeply. “Lizzie is so young. She didn’t seem that young before. Before we got into this mess. She was…I couldn’t keep my freaking hands off her, she was so hot. She was that way with me, too. She seemed so…experienced. But she wasn’t, you know? There wasn’t anyone before me and there hasn’t been anyone after. And now she’s just this scared little girl who would give anything not to have these problems.” He took a breath. “She needs me so much.”

“Jeez,” Jack said. “I’m sorry, Rick. My mind has been on so many other things, I never thought—”

“Hey, it’s not your problem, okay? It’s my problem. If I’d listened to you in the first place…”

“Don’t kick yourself. You’re not the first guy to have one occasion of unprotected sex. But guaranteed you’re among a very select number to get a girl pregnant on that first and only shot. We’re a small fraternity, for sure.”

“This happened to you?” Rick said, amazed.

“Yeah. Sure did.”

“How old were you?”

Jack turned and met Rick’s eyes. “Forty.”

“Mel?” he said, astonished.

“Between you and me, right?” Jack said. “I don’t know how Mel feels about me talking about it. But yeah, near as we can figure out—first strike. Difference is, I’m an old man, and not sorry. I wouldn’t have it any other way. In my case, I really did get lucky.”

“Shew. I guess if a midwife can screw up, I shouldn’t be so embarrassed.”

“My screwup, bud. All my adult life, that condom’s been automatic,” Jack said. “Not just because of the pregnancy issue, but because you don’t want to expose a woman to anything. If a woman’s willing to share her body with you, you don’t want to take a chance of giving her some STD you don’t even know you have. And you don’t want to be exposed. I lost my head. I didn’t protect her. If I weren’t so grateful for the baby, I’d feel bad about that. But hell, that stuff happens to people, pal. At least we’re old enough to take it on—and want to take it on. But you? Damn, buddy—you kids sure got hit hard. I can’t imagine how rough this is for you. Both of you.”

“My life is so weird right now,” Rick said. “I’m in high school, and I’m sneaking around to be alone with the girl who’s got my baby in her. And it’s not like it’s a punishment, being alone with her, you know? But I’m not even doing it for me—she’s the one who needs attention. I can’t refuse to touch her when she needs to be touched, not when she’s going through this. Can I?”

“She’d think you didn’t care about her,” Jack said.

Rick’s voice grew quiet. “Sometimes she just cries. We do it…I want it to be nice for her, hold her, keep her safe, and when it’s over, she cries and cries. And I don’t know what more to do.”

I think I might cry, Jack thought. “I think it has to be up to her,” he said. “Not what you want—what she wants.”

“That’s what I think, too. Maybe I should just do it. Talk to my grandma about letting Liz move in with us, into my bedroom. Marry her or something.”

“I think you need somebody’s permission for that.”

He shook his head, laughing. “We’re having a freaking baby! In less than three months!”

“Well…”

“They want her to give him up. No discussion. It’s best for him, everyone is saying. Even if they can convince her, I don’t think they can convince me. Do you have any idea how hard it is to keep my mouth shut right now?”

“Oh, man…” Jack was wishing about twenty things at that moment. Top on his list—he wished Rick was his son, so he could step in and help handle things. He understood they were too young to have a baby together, but it was going to happen anyway, and Rick shouldn’t be marrying anyone at seventeen. Still, that baby shouldn’t go away from its mother and father. And how could they do otherwise, at their tender ages? “You’re the father. Aren’t there papers you have to sign to let him go?”

“I don’t know. What the hell do I know?”

“You should talk to Mel,” he said. “Seriously—this discussion is for you and Mel. She does babies, I do other things.”

“Jack,” he said, “there’s a part of me that is so sorry I crossed that line like I did and set this up for us, for me and Liz. What a disaster. But there’s another part that saw that little guy on the ultrasound and just wants to hold him. Show him how to catch a ball…” Then he shook his head. “No matter how much talking people do, there’s no way anyone can get you ready for what happens to your life when you don’t get that condom out of your pocket.”