Shades of Gray (KGI #6)(47)

“I’ll wait as long as it takes, P.J. I’ll do whatever I can to help you. Whatever it takes for you to heal physically and emotionally. Just know that I’m not going anywhere, and it’s time for you to stop running.”

She snuggled back into his embrace, nuzzling her cheek against his chest as she processed the words that still floated around her mind. Such beautiful words, and she knew he meant them. Cole wasn’t the type to bullshit. He was lighthearted and fun when the occasion called for it, but at the end of the day, he was a straight shooter. He was blunt and spoke his mind.

And now that he had spoken precisely what was on his mind, she was blown away by the implications.

Here was a man who admitted he had feelings for her. Not only that, but he was also willing to wait for as long as it took her to get her head on straight and heal from the trauma she’d endured.

Hell, even more than that, he was risking his life, his reputation and his career in order to help her seek justice.

He was helping her find a way to murder another individual.

She winced at the thought of taking him down with her. She couldn’t bear it. Couldn’t bear it if the team was dragged through the mud with her.

She closed her eyes, secure in the knowledge that she was safe. Cole was here, surrounding her. Offering her unconditional support.

He’d been up front with her. Had told her what was in his heart. Now she had to figure out what was in her own heart and sort out her muddled feelings for a man who infuriated and enticed her in equal measure.

The future was a very scary prospect when she didn’t even know if she had a present. What scared her the most, though, was the very real possibility of screwing up a relationship with someone she genuinely cared about before it even got off the ground.

Cole deserved someone who could give him one hundred percent. Someone who could give herself without any reservations. He was a good man. Loyal. Fiercely protective. A man any woman would be lucky to have.

She could see herself as that woman, and maybe that was what scared her most of all.

And it wasn’t as simple as deciding they fit and then living happily ever after. They had their team to consider. They had dozens of young girls depending on them. They couldn’t afford to f**k it all up because their emotions got in the way.

As much as she wanted to be selfish and let tomorrow take care of itself, she knew she had to remain objective and make the mission her priority. For her own sanity as much as for the protection of those precious little girls.

CHAPTER 24

COLE carried P.J. onto the plane. It was almost as if he’d reached the end of his patience or just blown his resolve to let her do as much on her own as possible.

She’d limped out of the cottage with Cole’s help, and admittedly he’d pretty much carried her then too, but he’d allowed her the illusion of making it on her own. He’d even allowed her to get out of the vehicle at the airfield, but after three painful steps, he muttered a curse and simply swept her into his arms.

She hadn’t argued, because to be perfectly honest, each of those three steps had been agonizing and she was too exhausted to care if she looked weak to the rest of the team.

It was stupid of her to care anyway. Her team members had each gone down before and they hadn’t shown their ass or insisted on making it on their own. All the pressure was of her own making. She didn’t want to seem like she needed help, because she felt like she had more to prove.

Ridiculous, but there you had it. She was a woman, and her team didn’t even care. It was her with the chip on her shoulder and for no reason.

Cole settled her on the back couch and made sure she was comfortable while the others took their seats and belted themselves in.

“I’m okay, Cole,” she said, after he’d placed a pillow underneath her leg. “Go sit down and buckle up.”

He scowled and ignored her, taking position at the end of the couch. He placed a hand over her knee to steady her so her leg wouldn’t be jostled in takeoff.

She sighed, knowing it was fruitless to argue with him. He was one hardheaded male.

As soon as they were airborne, the others filtered back. There were only two armchairs making up the small sitting area along with the couch, and Dolphin and Renshaw took those while Baker slouched on the floor. Steele stood in the doorway, and it was evident he had something on his mind.

Donovan was conspicuously absent, and she didn’t know if it was because he wanted to give the team privacy to hash out their issues or if Steele had told him to hang back.

“I’m going to be straight with you, P.J.,” Steele said. “You’re going to take it easy for the next few weeks. You aren’t going back to your apartment. It’s too risky. Brumley’s likely got a hit out on you. And if I don’t think you’re ready for action by the time we make our move on him, you’re grounded.”

She started to protest but he shut her down before she could say the first word.

“I’ll tie you up and have Sam sit on you if I have to,” Steele said in a terse voice. “You’ll be a liability to the team, not to mention the personal danger you’d place yourself in.”

She bit her lip and didn’t offer argument. It would do no good. And if she told him that there was no way in hell she was staying behind while they went after Brumley, he’d do just as he threatened and have Sam or Garrett play nanny.