Second Chance Pass (Virgin River #5)(37)

He took her to a motel that resembled a country inn; they entered rooms on the parking lot side while the back of each room opened up onto a quaint, sheltered and private patio with table and chairs that faced the ocean cliffs. Lush pots full of geraniums sat around full green ferns and daisy beds that bordered the patios. In Vanessa’s room, which was joined to Cam’s, were fresh flowers and fruit.

After lunch at a sweet little seaside restaurant, they put the baby in the stroller and walked along the cliffs above the ocean, finally spreading a blanket under a full, leafy tree. They talked about their youth, their pasts, their experiences, their likes and dislikes. “You have a real way about you,” Vanni said. “I bet the mothers who bring their children to you fall in love with you all the time.”

“I’m just waiting for the right one to fall in love with me,” he said.

“You were never even tempted to get married?” she asked.

“There were a couple of close calls.”

“I bet you’ve had a million girlfriends,” she said.

He laughed. “That might be giving me too much credit,” he said. “Or not enough, I don’t know which. I’ve had some girlfriends. And many more attempts that didn’t work out.”

“Ah. You’re picky.”

He lifted an amused eyebrow. “Maybe they were.”

“Come on. Haven’t you been in love a hundred times?”

“Not quite. Not counting high school and college when I was in love with a different girl every week, the first one hit me in med school. I had it bad for another med student. It was very hot, very intense, very brief. Very painful. Took me off the market for a while.”

“Really? I’d take you for the heartbreaker.”

“No, sir,” he said, shaking his head. “I realized that up to that point I’d been attracted, but not in love. I had my share of flings, but this woman I went to pieces over. I was all of twenty-four and I could’ve made the promises—all of them. She was with another guy before I knew what hit me. Then another and another. I lost track of her during internship when I heard she was with the senior resident in her program. My pride suffered a major blow, not to mention my perspective.”

“There were more?” she asked.

“Oh, yeah,” he admitted. “I lived with a woman once—but not for long. I don’t think we made it three months. That was my only attempt at that.” He shrugged. “I was twenty-nine and it seemed like I ought to at least make an effort to have a stable, monogamous relationship. It was awful.”

“Awful? What went wrong?”

“Um, first of all, it wasn’t stable. She turned out to be crazy.” Then he smiled.

“Really? I mean, really?”

“You just wouldn’t believe it. A total loose cannon. She threw things at me and everything. I almost went deaf from her screaming.”

“You moved in with her without knowing that?”

His cheeks took on a rosy stain. “I probably should’ve guessed, but I was in denial.” He laughed. “Because she was really…” He swallowed. “Because she was very sexy. I thought I could handle anything if I could just…” His voice dwindled away.

“What men will do,” Vanni said, shaking her head.

“Yeah. Guilty. Did you ever live with anyone?” he asked.

“Never. The closest I came was when I was going with my husband, I traveled from San Francisco to Camp Pendleton to spend every weekend with him while he was still stateside.”

“In college,” he said. “Who were you in love with in college?”

She laughed. “Bret McDoughal. Captain of the football team, president of the debate club. I really expected him to be a senator by now.”

“What is he doing?”

“He sells used cars in Virginia. He makes sleazy, late-night commercials and wears his hair in some kind of weird pompadour. In college, he looked like he was going to take over the world. I was nuts about him.”

“How’d he let you get away?”

“A lot of girls were nuts about him. He had a very short attention span.”

“What a dope,” Cameron said.

“Yeah? Well, I think I made a very slim escape there,” she said, laughing.

He reached out and covered her hand with his. “Can you tell me about Matt? Is that too hard for you to do?”

“It’s okay. I like to talk about him,” she said, and resisted the memory that made one of the things about her relationship with Paul so comfortable—they could share memories. “Matt was a wonderful man, a great friend. He was so funny, so full of energy. What snagged me immediately was his sense of humor—he made me laugh till I cried. And there were other things about him—like his commitment to the Marine Corps, his commitment to his buddies, his boys as he called them—that filled me with admiration. His commitment to me,” she added, somewhat quietly. “He was single-minded when it came to the things he cared about. And he was strong—not just physically. Emotionally strong, too. But you should’ve seen his arms and shoulders. He could do pull-ups and push-ups all day long.”

“Big, like all those Virgin River men,” Cameron said.

“Not really,” she said. “Broad shouldered but not even six feet. When I wore heels, we were the same height. Dark haired, like you. Blue eyes, like yours. Tender and sensitive and easy to talk to.” She got a little misty. “Sometimes I really miss him. I’m sorry.”