Reborn (Shadow Falls: After Dark #1)(73)

“I’ll call them and let them know what happened and that you’re okay. I have a team showing up any minute to take the body. We need to do it before light.”

Della looked one last time at Chan, knowing she’d never see his face again. Never see him smile that silly quirky grin again.

But when she started walking with Burnett, she realized she was wrong. Chan stood peering at her behind a tree. And he wasn’t alone. Someone was with him, half hidden. Chan waved. He had a sad smile on his face. Della’s steps faltered.

Sorry. I’m so sorry, Chan.

“You okay?” Burnett asked.

“Yeah,” she said, “I just thought…” When she looked back, Chan was gone.

“Thought what?”

Thought I saw a ghost. “Nothing, I’m just tired.”

But she wasn’t that tired. She was seeing ghosts. How the hell was that possible?

At ten that morning, Della sat alone at the kitchen table in her cabin. Sleep-deprived and feeling like she was dying inside, she found that even breathing hurt. Earlier, she’d spoken to Kylie and Miranda briefly, and told them she’d explain more later. They would be there after lunch, which gave her a few hours to prepare herself to tell the story again.

She’d also learned that Steve had gone back yesterday to the vet’s office. Which explained why he wasn’t here when she showed up. She’d bet Jessie was happy.

Holiday had spent several hours here commiserating and offering warm, comforting touches. But her comfort didn’t last. Even Holiday said that grief was the one emotion a fae’s touch had less effect on.

But Della wasn’t sure which emotion she felt most. Grief or guilt.

And the camp leader sensed this, too. If she’d told Della once, she’d told her a dozen times … it wasn’t Della’s fault for not talking to Chan.

Della didn’t buy it. Maybe Steve and his doctor buddy could have done something. Or perhaps she could have gotten Kylie to heal Chan. If she’d called him back.

If? If? If? Why the hell hadn’t she called him back?

She’d almost told Holiday about seeing Chan at the gate and again tonight, but at the last minute decided to wait and ask Kylie about it. The fact that she could see ghosts should have scared the shit out of her, and maybe it would when she wasn’t drowning in other emotions.

After Holiday left, Jenny came by. She’d wanted to come in and offer her condolences, but Della blocked the door. “I just need to be by myself.”

The girl nodded, looking rejected, and turned to go.

Guilt pricked Della’s conscience. “Jenny?”

She turned around as if hoping Della had changed her mind. Of course, she hadn’t. “Thanks for understanding.”

The girl nodded, ran up the stairs, and hugged her. “I know I’m not as cool as Kylie, but I think of you as my friend. And I know you must be hurting and I want you to know I care. I wish I could turn myself into fae like Kylie could, and take away some of your pain. But I haven’t mastered that yet.”

“I’m fine, but thanks.” Della forced herself to say the right thing. Not just because it would have been rude to do otherwise, but because she did like Jenny. And through unwanted tears, she watched the girl leave. Finally alone again, Della went back in and plopped back at the kitchen table. She listened to Chan’s message about a dozen times, and each time it hurt more than the last.

She looked at her phone on the table. Part of her said she should call Steve. She’d told him yesterday that she would. But if she called him now she might start crying. She didn’t want to cry anymore.

What she wanted was to reach into her chest and yank out the pain. She wanted to go back in time and do things differently. Call Chan back. Never sleep with Lee. Make her daddy love her a little more so he wouldn’t turn his back on her.

She heard footsteps moving toward her cabin. Had Steve heard the news and come? Her heart ached to have him here.

She inhaled. Not Steve.

Chase’s scent filled her nose—a scent that again tickled her memory. She sure as hell didn’t want to deal with him. Right then she remembered her theory that Chase had been meeting Chan. She’d obviously been wrong.

A knock sounded on her cabin door. Why had he come here?

“Go away,” she said, head down, staring at her hands laced together. She could hear the carbonation fizzling from a Diet Coke she’d opened but hadn’t drunk. She almost felt the same fizzing inside her head, inside her heart.

The cabin door opened and she smelled and heard the black-haired vampire take a few steps inside.

She didn’t look up. “I said—”

“I know, I heard what you said.”

She finally glanced up. He stood there staring at her, his arms crossed over his chest, his posture making a statement of defiance.

And yet you came inside anyway. This was why the guy infuriated her. “Leave,” she seethed. She had too much on her plate to have to deal with him.

“I heard about your cousin. I just wanted to say … I’m sorry.”

Her chest gripped. “Fine, you said it. Now leave.”

He took a few more steps inside. “You don’t need to just sit here. You need to go run, move. Spend some energy. It’ll help with … everything,” he added.

“You don’t know what I need!” she snapped, and it felt good to have a target other than herself to aim her anger at.