Raw Redemption (Crossing the Line #4)(52)

“I can see that.”

When the captain didn’t elaborate, Ailish’s curiosity got the better of her. “Your wife?”

A brisk nod. “She raised herself, her sister. Saw an opportunity for a fresh start and took it. I can sympathize with that. I’ve only spent a short while in your company, and I can see you’re not your father’s daughter.” He leaned back in his chair. “And despite what Henrik did to land on my squad, I trust his judgment.”

Hearing Henrik’s name made the stupid, traitorous organ in her chest leap into a sprint, winding her in mere seconds. Once again, a weight pressed behind her eyes, fury making her stomach burn. Too much. So much. And he wasn’t even there for her to shout at. She could feel Derek watching her, assessing, and didn’t want to take the bait by asking about Henrik. But who knew when she would get another chance to fill in the gaps? “What did land him on your squad?”

Derek’s stoic expression didn’t change. “I wondered if he’d told you.”

A flashback to her walk with Erin in the woods chose that moment to crop up, replay like a homemade movie. Hadn’t Erin said something similar? Just how heinous was Henrik’s crime? “I’ve met Connor and Erin. The rest of your team tonight.” She shook her head. “He doesn’t belong here.”

“He does. He made a choice.”

“Yes. So did I. I made them every day.” Ailish could see the desk in her bedroom, the gambling debts of unknown men spread across the surface like a bloody battlefield. Could see the remnants of her eraser, hear the scratching of her pencil. “But sometimes hard choices are all that’s left.”

“Don’t I know it?” Derek remained silent a few beats before leafing through the documents on the battered desk. “You’re not going to tell us what we need, what we should be looking for and where. I can see that.”

“No. I agreed to cooperate if Henrik stayed away from my father.” She massaged her aching throat again. “He lied.”

“He made the only decision he could to keep you safe and get his spot on the force back.”

The flow of Ailish’s blood slowed. “Get his spot back?”

Derek blew out a breath. “I might be to blame for some of the secrecy between you and Henrik. I asked him to treat this case like a job, when it was clear from the beginning he’s not objective where you’re concerned.” He paused. “I assured Henrik I’d do what it took to have him reinstated if he—”

“Brings down my father.” She swallowed the stone in her throat. Getting back his badge would mean everything to Henrik. Everything. And she’d been his ace in the hole to gain entry to Caine’s world. But he hadn’t taken it. Not ready to feel sympathy or be reasonable, Ailish pushed to her feet and paced toward the small ground-level window. “I’ve been kept safe my whole life. Lied to. I’m tired of it. He should have been honest. I just want people to be honest with me.”

“Be careful what you wish for.”

Ailish turned. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

Another industrial-strength sigh from the captain. “Look, I need you in that house. You’ve been inside, know where everything is located, and that’s information no one else has. It could whittle this operation down from indefinite to one damn day. And that means fewer people die by your father’s hand.”

Her legs turned to lead. “Henrik would never agree to let me inside.”

“He and I made a deal.” Derek stood, pacing behind his desk once more. “You remain safe and walk out of here without a record. I’m already working on the former, and there’s no safer place for you than with Henrik. Trust me on that.”

“No.” Frustration welled so severely inside Ailish, it spilled over like an erupting volcano. “No. I won’t blindly trust you. Or Henrik. I’ve been brought here on a lie. You’re lying to Henrik, despite how you justify it to yourself.” She lifted her arms and let them fall at her sides. “And I’m done being in the middle of everyone’s deception. It’s a terrible place to be.”

To the captain’s credit, he didn’t appear unaffected by her speech. Far from it. But there was still determination in the set of his jaw. “I would like to let you walk out of here, free and clear, Ms. O’Kelly. Free to start over. But I’m responsible for a city. And that city is at risk as long as your father’s operation is up and running. My family lives here. Millions of families. So I’ll do what’s needed. That’s the burden I accepted when I took this job.” He looked away a moment, hands propped on hips. A ditch opened in Ailish’s stomach, but she didn’t know where the sense of impending doom came from until he continued. “Do you ever wonder why we released you from police custody?”

Say no, a voice whispered at the back of her head. But it would have been a lie, and she’d just got done voicing her distaste of liars. The captain would see right through her, and she’d be a hypocrite. “Yes. I’ve wondered every day.”

“Henrik.” Derek shuffled the documents into a stack and shoved them into a manila folder before lifting his gaze to Ailish again. “Henrik destroyed the evidence we had against you. It’s what lost him his badge. What put him on this squad.”