Rapture in Death (In Death #4)(35)

“Madam, I am afraid we have no tables available. You would perhaps prefer the delicatessen on the next block north.”

“Yeah, I would.” Because his attitude annoyed her, she stuck her badge in his face. “But I’m eating here. I don’t give a shit if that puts your chips in a twist, pal. Where’s Dr. Mira’s table?”

“Put that away,” he hissed, looking everywhere at once and fluttering his hands. “Do you wish my customers to lose their appetites?”

“They’ll really lose them if I take my weapon out, which is what I’ll do if you don’t show me Dr. Mira’s table and see that I’ve got a glass of iced fizzy water in the next twenty seconds. Got that program?”

His lips clamped together and he nodded. Stiff-backed, he led the way up a swing of faux stone steps to the second level, and then onto an alcove fashioned to resemble an ocean terrace.

“Eve.” Mira rose immediately from her pretty table and took both of Eve’s hands. “You look wonderful.” To Eve’s faint surprise, Mira kissed her cheek. “Rested. Happy.”

“I guess I am.” After a brief hesitation, Eve leaned forward and touched her lips to Mira’s cheek in turn.

The droid had already snapped to a server. “Dr. Mira’s companion wishes a fizzy water.”

“Iced,” Eve added, curling her lip at the maitre d’.

“Thank you, Armand.” Mira’s soft blue eyes twinkled. “We’ll order shortly.”

Eve took another quick scan of the restaurant, the diners in their summer pastels and pricey cottons. She shifted on her padded chair. “We could have met in your office.”

“I wanted to take you to lunch. This is one of my favorite spots.”

“The droid’s an ass**le.”

“Well, perhaps Armand is a bit overprogrammed, but the food is wonderful. You should try the Clams Maurice. You won’t regret it.” She settled back when Eve’s water was served. “Tell me, how was your honeymoon?”

Eve gulped down half the water and felt human again. “Tell me how long I can expect people to ask me that question?”

Mira laughed. She was a pretty woman with soft sable hair swept back from a quietly attractive face. She wore one of her habitually elegant suits, this one in pale yellow. She appeared polished and tidy. She was one of the leading behavioral psychiatrists in the country, and was often consulted by the police about the most vicious crimes.

Though Eve was unaware of it, Mira’s feelings toward her were strong and deeply maternal.

“It embarrasses you.”

“Well, you know. Honeymoon. Sex. Personal.” Eve rolled her eyes. “Stupid. I guess I’m just not used it. To being married. To Roarke. To the whole business.”

“You love each other and make each other happy. There’s no need to get used to it, only to enjoy it. You’re sleeping well?”

“Mostly.” And because Mira knew her deepest and darkest secrets, Eve dropped her guard. “I still have nightmares, but not as often. The memories come and go. None of it’s as bad now that I’ve dealt with it.”

“Have you dealt with it?”

“My father raped me, abused me, beat me,” Eve said flatly. “I killed him. I was eight years old. I survived. Whoever I was before I was found in that alley doesn’t matter now. I’m Eve Dallas. I’m a good cop. I’ve made myself.”

“Good.” There would be more, Mira thought. Traumas such as the one Eve had lived through cast echoes that never completely faded. “You still put the cop first.”

“I am a cop first.”

“Yes.” Mira smiled a little. “I suppose you always will be. Why don’t we order, then you can tell me why you called.”

CHAPTER EIGHT

Eve chose Mira’s recommendation of clams, then treated herself to some of the real yeast bread set in a silver basket on the table. As she ate, she gave Mira a profile of Fitzhugh and the details of his death.

“You’d like me to tell you if he was capable of taking his own life. Disposed to it, emotionally, psychologically.”

Eve cocked a brow. “That’s the plan.”

“Unfortunately, I can’t do that. I can tell you that everyone is capable of it, given the right circumstances and emotional state.”

“I don’t believe that,” Eve said so firmly, so decisively, that Mira smiled.

“You’re a strong woman, Eve. Now. You’ve made yourself strong, rational, tough-minded. You’re a survivor. But you remember despair. Helplessness. Hopelessness.”

Eve did; too well, too clearly. She shifted in her chair. “Fitzhugh wasn’t a helpless man.”

“The surface can hide a great deal of turmoil.” Dr. Mira held up a hand before Eve could interrupt again. “But I agree with you. Given your profile of him, his background, his lifestyle, I wouldn’t tag him as a likely candidate for suicide — certainly not one of such an abrupt and impulsive nature.”

“It was abrupt,” Eve agreed. “I dealt with him in court right before this happened. He was as smug and arrogant and full of his own sense of importance as ever.”

“I’m sure that’s true. I can only say that some of us — many of us — confronted with some crisis, some personal upheaval of the heart or mind, choose to end it rather than live through it or change it. You and I can’t know what Fitzhugh might have found himself confronted with on the night of his death.”