Pushing the Limits (Pushing the Limits #1)(78)

“Hey, baby.”

She gave me a quick glance and a shy smile. “Hey.”

I glanced at the clock. Ten-thirty in the morning. Isaiah and Beth would probably roll in soon, but it would be a sin to see her put clothes on. “How did you sleep?”

The smile fell, but she kept drawing. “Better than usual.”

My heart dropped. I wanted to be the answer to her problems. “You had nightmares?”

She nodded. “Not nearly as vivid, though. Plus I slept longer than I normally do.”

“Why didn’t you wake me?”

“Because you’re cute when you sleep. See?” She turned the page and showed me the drawing of me sleeping.

“What are you working on now?” I snatched the pad and took her hand in mine when she tried to grab it back.

“Don’t look. It’s a work in progress. Just messing around really. Noah …”

I flipped the page to her work in progress and quit breathing.

“Please don’t be mad. I wanted to give you something. Oh, God,” she moaned. “This was a bad idea.”

I tore my eyes away from the page, cupping her face with my hand. “No. It’s the best present anyone has ever given me.” I wanted to kiss her, but I couldn’t. I had to look at the picture again. “How did you do it?” Somehow, she’d drawn my parents.

She scooted next to me, resting her head on my shoulder. “You talk about them a lot. Not like long monologues or anything, but enough that I’ve been able to create a picture in my head. You told me that Jacob looks like your dad and that you and Tyler resemble your mom. You said Mrs. Marcos reminds you of your mom. I saw this picture of your brothers and, I don’t know … I put it all together.”

I love you. Every part of me ached to say it. I gazed into those beautiful eyes and knew I loved her more than I loved myself. I’d known for weeks, but I couldn’t say the words. Saying the words—it made Echo official. It made the attachment I already knew I had to her real.

But it was real and it was official. I was a pansy-ass for not saying the words. Say them. Just say them. I sucked in a breath, opened my mouth, then snapped it shut. No. Not here. I’d take her someplace nice. Someplace beautiful. Maybe back to my parents’ fountain. “Your dad called last night looking for you. I told him you were here.”

She drew away from me, wrapping her hands around her knees. “I guess I should probably head home.” A bitter smile hung on her lips. “Think he’ll forgive me for breaking the rules for one night?”

I didn’t want her to go, ever. I wanted Echo in my bed every night with my arms and legs wrapped around her. But how? In two months she’d be a free woman. Free of high school and, if she chose, free of her father, but I wouldn’t be free.

Taking care of my brothers wouldn’t be like babysitting, it would be a job. A full-time job that required responsibility. How did I explain to young children the difference between a serious dating relationship and a committed, married relationship when they awoke to find Echo in my bed? Even better, would the judge allow me custody knowing half my heart belonged to someone else?

I wouldn’t be their big brother. Fuck, Mrs. Collins was right— I’d be their dad and Echo … Echo would be the woman I was sleeping with. The words tumbled out of my mouth before I knew what I was saying. “Marry me.”

Her eyes widened and her head tilted with a twitch. “What?”

I brushed my hair out of my face and sat up, putting the sketch pad down. “I know it’s crazy, but after we graduate, marry me. We’ll get custody of my brothers and you can get away from your dad and we’ll be a family. I know you want a family as much as I do.”

Her mouth gaped and her eyes flickered between the pillow and the sheets. “Noah … I … I don’t know. I mean, how would we support ourselves? Where would we live?”

“Frank offered me the day shift manager position yesterday. If you marry me, you’ll get to be on my insurance. I know you’ll nail one of those college scholarships you’ve applied for, so we don’t have to worry about paying tuition. You can get a parttime job and help me take care of the boys. Maybe if things go well, I could take some night classes in a year.”

Excitement rippled through me. Maybe I didn’t have to negotiate. Maybe I could have it all, just at a slower rate than I would have liked. “It’ll be perfect. You can go to classes and work while the boys are in school. I can get them ready and off to school before my shift and you’ll be there to pick them up. There is absolutely no way the judge can tell me no.”

“No.” Echo’s small voice caught me off guard. She grabbed her jeans and rolled off the bed. “No. Is this all I’ve ever been to you?” She shrugged them on and then threw on her shirt. “A pawn to get your brothers back?”

No. She was distorting my every word. I sprang off the bed. “No, baby. You have to know how much I care for you.”

She shoved on her boots. “Really, Noah? You’ve never once told me that you love me, yet you’re willing to marry me. I’m not sure if you were listening, but your proposal sounded something like this. ‘Hey, baby, marry me and then you can take care of my brothers.’”

Everything inside of me twisted and began to shatter. I’d f**ked this up. “You’ve got to know how I feel. Please, baby, I …”