Pushing the Limits (Pushing the Limits #1)(33)

“You’re asking the wrong guy.” What did I know about love? All I knew was that I couldn’t get Echo Emerson out of my mind. No doubt, I wanted her. I couldn’t rid my mind of images of her body writhing in pleasure against mine. That siren voice whispering my name. But she appealed to me in more than a physical way. I loved her smile, the light in her eyes when she laughed, and damn if she couldn’t keep up with me. “If you figure it out, let me know.”

Echo

“I’m sorry,” I said for the third time. “I didn’t know you were in such a hurry.”

Luke kept my hand and dragged me through the crowded mall toward the movie theater. When the crowd gave way, he pulled me next to him. “I’m with your dad on this one. It’s a car. I mean, that car’s a beast and all, but still a car. You’d be better off selling it and making some major cash than wasting any more money or time on it.”

The movie started at eight instead of the eight-forty-five he originally told me. I’d made an appointment at six with a mechanic willing to come to the house to look at Aires’ car. I’d taken the ACT again this morning, come home, accidentally fallen asleep (had a day terror—if that’s what you call a night terror that occurs during the day), and then woken up less than twenty minutes before the mechanic arrived. Luke had waited a whole patient ten minutes before he told the mechanic to leave because we had plans. The mechanic had gone, telling me he’d email the estimate.

“It’s all I have left of Aires.” We entered the carpeted area of the movie theater. I yanked my hand away. “I thought you would understand.”

Going out with Luke was exactly like I remembered—at least the last two months of our relationship, minus the pawing. On our group date last weekend, I asked him if we could take things slow and he agreed—for the first few dates. I had a feeling tonight was going to be the end of Luke’s hands-off promise. So far, dating him the second time around stunk.

Luke placed his hands on his hips. “It’s a good thing Stephen and Lila got here on time to get tickets. It’s sold out.”

Self-absorbed, egotistical jerk … “This isn’t going to work,” I said.

He balled his fist and then forced himself to relax his hands. “Look, I want this to work. You’re just mad because I’m siding with your dad on this stupid car thing. Lila’s dating Stephen. Grace is with Chad. You and I make perfect sense.” He caressed my cheek. That touch used to melt me into a puddle. All I felt now were calluses, a wart and dry skin. “I know it’s rough trying to figure us out again. I think our problem is that we’re taking it too slow. I deserve an award for keeping my hands off of you.”

Luke took a step toward me, slipped a hand around my back, and pressed me into him. Every muscle I had tensed. This didn’t feel natural at all.

“Let’s go see the movie and afterward we can go back to my place. I think you’ll feel a lot better once I help you remember what we’re so good at doing.” His breath fanned over my face and I swear a few spit particles did, too. Why was I doing this again?

“Echo! There you guys are. The movie theater is already packed.” Lila bounced beside me. Relieved for the interruption, I stepped away from Luke.

Stephen and Luke exchanged some sort of weird male handshake. Stephen pointed at theater three. “Come on. It’s starting. We couldn’t get six seats together, but we saved two for you in the back.” Stephen gave Luke a high five. Boy, Luke would be disappointed when he figured out nothing was going to happen in the back.

The guys walked ahead while Lila and I fell behind. Lila asked, “You okay?”

“I don’t think Luke and I are going to work. He hasn’t changed a bit.” Why, like everything else, did this have to be complicated? Why couldn’t anything be simple, the way it had been freshman year?

Lila took a deep breath and pressed her lips together. “We’ll talk later. Let’s enjoy the movie, okay?”

She caught up with Stephen and Luke grabbed my hand. “You just need to focus on being like you used to be. You know— normal,” he said.

Lila sent me a pleading glance. I sank in the seat next to Luke and let him put his arm around me. All of us prayed for normal. But so far, normal only meant more misery.

IN THE FIRST FIVE MINUTES OF the movie we met a teenager who graduated from high school and joined the Marines. Ten minutes in, we watched him graduate from boot camp. Twenty minutes into the movie, I dry heaved.

Nausea swelled my throat, my tongue felt ten sizes too big and I couldn’t breathe. No matter how much air I tried to suck in, none of it went into my lungs. I sprang from my seat and tripped down the dark stairs of the theater to the sounds of men screaming in agony to God and their mothers.

I raced for the women’s bathroom, busted past the door and clung to the cold sink. The mirror revealed a nightmare. Red curls clung to the sweat on my forehead. My entire body shook like an earthquake.

The image of the man’s friend stepping on an IED flashed in my mind. The bile inched up my throat. Oh, God—Aires. Was that what happened to him? Did he scream in agony? Did he know he was dying? The face of the blood-drenched actor merged with Aires’ face. My body wrenched forward, my stomach cramped and I coughed with the dry heave.

He was dead and he’d died in misery, terrified.