Only Mine (Fool's Gold #4)(10)

“I don’t even know where that is.”

“Kazakhstan is the ninth largest country in the world and the largest country that is completely landlocked.” Dakota shrugged. “I did research.”

“I can tell.”

“Russia is to the north, China to the southeast. The agency was very open and encouraging about the adoption. I filled out the paperwork and prepared to wait.”

Her mother’s mouth dropped open. “You’re getting a child.”

Dakota winced. “No. In late January, after I’d finished the paperwork and had the home and background checks, they called and said they had a little boy for me. But the next day they called back and said there’s been a mistake. He was going to another family. A couple.”

She drew in a breath to keep from crying. At some point the body should just run out of tears, but she had enough personal experience to know that didn’t happen.

“I’m not clear if it was an honest mistake or if they prefer couples and that’s why I didn’t get him. I’m still on the waiting list and the director of the agency swears it’s going to happen.”

Her mother leaned back in her chair. “I can’t believe you’ve been through all this on your own.”

“I couldn’t talk about it,” Dakota said quickly. “Not with anyone. At first I felt too frail to discuss it at all. Then I was afraid I’d jinx the adoption. It wasn’t you, Mom.”

“How could it be?” Denise asked. “I’m practically perfect. But still.”

For the second time, Dakota laughed. It felt good to find humor in life again. She’d had a few months where nothing had been happy or right.

Dakota touched her arm. “I’m dealing. Most days it’s okay. Sometimes it’s hard to get out of bed. Maybe if I’d been in a relationship, I wouldn’t have felt so unlovable.”

“You’re not unlovable. You’re beautiful and smart and fun to be with. Any man would be lucky to have you.”

“That’s what I tell myself. Apparently the entire gender is blind and stupid.”

“They are. You’ll find someone.”

“I’m not so sure. I can’t blame my lack of love life on the man shortage here. Not entirely. I didn’t date when I was away at college, either.” She shrugged. “I haven’t told anyone, Mom. I’ll talk to Nevada and Montana in a few days. If you wouldn’t mind, I thought you could tell my brothers after that.” Denise would explain what had happened in simple terms, and it would be a whole lot less embarrassing than coming from her.

Her mother nodded. Once her sisters knew, they would want to rally, but there wasn’t anything to do. Her body was different. Most of the time she was okay with that.

“You’re still on the list to get a baby from Kazakhstan?” her mother asked.

“Yes. Eventually I should get a call. I’m staying positive.”

“That’s important. I know you don’t love working on the reality show, but it’s a nice distraction.”

“It’s beyond crazy. What were they thinking? Mayor Marsha is terrified something bad is going to happen. You know how she loves the town.”

“We all do,” Denise said absently. She frowned slightly. “Just because you haven’t fallen in love yet doesn’t mean you’re not going to. Loving someone and being loved is a gift. Relax and it will happen.”

Dakota hoped she was right. She leaned toward her mother. “You got really lucky with dad. Maybe it’s a genetic thing, like being a good singer.”

Her mother grinned. “Meaning I should start dating again? Oh, please. I’m too old.”

“Hardly.”

“It’s an interesting idea, but not for today.” She rose and walked toward the refrigerator. “Now, what can I fix you to eat? A BLT? I think I have some frozen quiche, too.”

Dakota thought about pointing out that this wasn’t a problem that could be fixed by food. Not that her mother would listen. Denise was nothing, if not traditional.

“A BLT would be nice,” she said, knowing it wasn’t the sandwich that would make her feel better, but the love that went into it.

DAKOTA WAS MEETING her sisters at Jo’s Bar. She arrived a little early—mostly because her house had gotten too quiet, with only her thoughts to keep her company.

She crossed to the bar, prepared to order a lemondrop martini, only to realize that Finn Andersson was standing in the center of the room, looking more than a little confused.

Poor guy, she thought as she walked toward him. Jo’s Bar wasn’t the usual kind of hangout where a man went at the end of a difficult day.

Until very recently, most of the businesses in Fool’s Gold were owned by and catered to women. Including everyone’s favorite bar.

Jo was a pretty woman in her thirties. She’d moved to town a few years ago, bought the bar and converted it into the kind of place where women felt comfortable. The lighting was flattering, the bar stools had backs and hooks for hanging purses, and the big-screen TVs were tuned to Project Runway and pretty much anything on HGTV. Music always played. Tonight it was ’80s rock.

The men had their place—it was a small room in back with a pool table. But without preparation, Jo’s Bar could be shocking to the average male.